Postby zephyr » Fri Dec 13, 2024 12:17 pm
This probably isn't very healthy, but it's a practical response for me. I tend to go to the worst outcome and work my way back. It goes something like this: ok, this is it, things are going south, and I have 3 months to prepare. What needs to be done before then in case I can't easily get it done after because of chemo schedules or whatever? Car maintenance? Probably don't want the car breaking down when you're least able to handle it. Maybe clean out old paperwork to make room for more later? Kitchen cabinets filled with expired cans and spices? In my case, I head to my guest room and start pulling out things to donate: clothes that haven't been worn in over a year, art supplies that aren't being used, small appliances I was sure I couldn't live without but only used once and then put on a shelf. I don't want my husband to have to deal with them later, or maybe another caregiver to be required to search through the unused to find what's needed. Again, maybe it's not a healthy response but at least I feel like I'm DOING something constructive. Plus it distracts me. It's a kind of I can't fix the cancer so what CAN I fix?
Nov-2009 Early stage CRC, routine colonoscopy
2010-2014 F/U colonoscopies, all clear
Jun-2016 CRC during F/U colonoscopy, surgery, Stage 4, KRAS, MSS
Aug-2016-May-2018 Folfox, 5FU, Folfiri & Avastin
Aug/Sep-2018 YAG laser surgeries (Germany), 11 nodules removed
Nov-2018 clean CT scan
Mar-2019 New lung nodules
Apr-2019 Dec-2020 Xeloda/Avastin, SBRT, cont. Xeloda/Avastin
Mar-2021 Forfiri/Avastin
Mar-2022 Ablation & Thoracotomy
Feb-2023 Folfiri & Avastin
Nov-2023 Xeloda & Avastin