Update from Riki's Wife

ElenaSoprano · Postby **ElenaSoprano** » Sun Dec 04, 2022 2:35 am

Heartbreaking... As a new member of this forum, I found Riki's messages to be a source of much-needed strength and resilience. Ruth, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family...

beach sunrise · Postby **beach sunrise** » Sun Dec 04, 2022 7:36 am

Ruth, my heart hurts so bad right now. You were blessed to have him in your life. He was such an important man here on the forum.
I will miss him so much!
I would also like to know about the gofundme for my friend Rikimaroo.

Markdale · Postby **Markdale** » Sun Dec 04, 2022 5:18 pm

My condolences. He was very knowledgeable and helped guide a lot of people here.

Luna18 · Postby **Luna18** » Mon Dec 05, 2022 8:37 am

I am really sorry for your loss. Please, DM me with the gofundme link.
Sending you and your family love and light
Patricia

GrouseMan · Postby **GrouseMan** » Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:26 pm

I am very sorry for your loss Ruth. It is tremendously hard for those of us that are caregivers. I am happy that he told you he loved you. My wife was unconscious for the last several days of her life and we could not discuss our feelings. I was quite the wreck for some time afterwards. Took me more than a year I would say to regain my mental balance. I thought I was getting dementia for a while as I would walk into a room and forget why I went in there. For me my attention span and short-term memory seemed to be in disarray. I hope you don't experience that. I hope you have family and friends nearby to help you through your grief. I didn't.

Sincerely

GrouseMan

Rikimaroo · Postby **Rikimaroo** » Mon Dec 05, 2022 7:05 pm

Thank you all, really I thank you so much for your words. As I've read my updated post to you all, I've cried, really really cried bcuz that last week was really tough in all sorts of ways. He knew it hurt me so much to see him the way his frail body was, to know his mind was breaking down & falling asleep more & more, to realize he could barely talk & what's more, he would only talk to me bcuz I could read the signs of him needing something. My voice would calm him, even when I would talk a bit loud in his ear so he would know it was me touching or moving & giving him medicine. The morphine would keep him asleep which sucked bcuz I wanted him to talk more & more but the pain was bigger so I had to keep giving it to him. I'll send a private message to those who requested but in case I miss anyone, the gofundme page for him can be found by typing this in the search: In loving memory of Narine Harripersaud...

He also has a YouTube Channel (can you believe that?!) & will happy to know just how much of a funny dude he was. That channel can be found under: Rikimaroo (there's two channels with this name but the one with the Music Notes image is his). The video I have posted for friends & family to see (which I've added some more things to it) is private: https://youtu.be/mGlvKLRDzok (maybe you can copy & paste?) but I would love to share that with you guys :-)

Thank you SO much!

MadMed · Postby **MadMed** » Mon Dec 05, 2022 8:42 pm

Thank you for sharing, this was moving. I felt a sense of kinship with Riki, and now with the images, I believe we would have been great friends. His memory lives within you and the children.

nmorgen · Postby **nmorgen** » Tue Dec 06, 2022 3:16 am

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Rock_Robster · Postby **Rock_Robster** » Tue Dec 06, 2022 5:36 am

I’m so sorry to hear this. Thank you for sharing your story together and personal photos here. Riki was a light and institution for many of us.

aquarian_asian · Postby **aquarian_asian** » Tue Dec 06, 2022 8:20 am

Sorry for your loss, Mrs Riki and please take care of you and family. I usually read this post and it is really a sad news.

Rikimaroo · Postby **Rikimaroo** » Thu Dec 08, 2022 11:25 am

Good morning guys,

So in the process of "cleaning up" i'm having a hard time figuring out what to do with all the medical supplies my husband was given from hospice. He had a colostomy bag & so we got A LOT of supplies. I would love to help someone out by shipping out these supplies.. hope this is not something weird I'm offering? I don't know but i feel like throwing it out is a waste & that it could help someone else out. This includes diapers, colostomy bags, & many other little supplies that goes with this. They were not used or opened. Am really hoping it's not weird ...

Cleaning up after a loved one has passed away is & can be overwhelming. The mountain of things to straighten out from his name to mine, even the health insurance for the kids is stressful (they don't want to talk to me as I wasn't added in the account lol) so offering the death certificate is ready for all these companies. My husband left me as much information as possible written down but now that I'm having to take over & clean up, I'm realizing that I am missing a lot of information such as account #'s, who the companies are to be paid monthly, username/passwords & so little by little I've started to write down additional notes to his spreadsheet. I thought I was more than ready but no.... life is showing me that there's SO much more to be aware of. Can't wait till tax season is here so I can go completely insane :-(

but that too I'll have to overcome. Thank God I have many who are willing to hep me out with information they know how to get, otherwise I would be so lost.

My husband was into IT (& so am I) so computers was something he loved. Anything to help out because to him & myself, computers is like putting a puzzle together but to him, teaching people about how to work better with their computer was "satisfaction" of a job well done.

Am hoping to hear from someone ... even if it is to tell me "you're crazy Ruth, you don't offer those things to anyone" ... lol

Sincerely,
Ruth
GoFundMe link:
please contact poster via PM - ccmc
Celebrating Narine's fun life moments:
https://youtu.be/mGlvKLRDzok

MadMed · Postby **MadMed** » Thu Dec 08, 2022 1:27 pm

Thanks for the note Ruth, this helps me make sure i'm organized when time comes. My wife would be completely lost, fortunately there's someone there to help her.
Also not weird at all about asking about donating the stuff, i am sure the need is there. Hopefully someone here has a good tip, i remember there was something similar on this board.
Also, thanks for sharing the gofundme, just donated.

Riki was a good person, unfortunately heaven needs those people back the most it seems.

Peregrine · Postby **Peregrine** » Thu Dec 08, 2022 1:54 pm

Thanks for the update, Ruth. I hope you can continue to keep posting here from time to time.

Just a short note to say that I'm sure it's OK to give away those kinds of unexpired, unopened supplies. That's exactly what I did after I had my ileostomy reversal. I was fortunate to find a local colon cancer support group that was very happy to take whatever I wanted to give them.

It's not the same for prescription medications, however. By law, they cannot be given to anyone other than the person to whom they were prescribed. After I finished chemo, I had a lot of unused prescription nausea and pain meds that I never used. My only option was to take them to a local pharmacy and ask them to put them in their secure medical supply trash bin.

I'm hoping you and your children will be able to have a nice holiday season. I appreciated hearing the Christmas carols that Riki had recorded on his YouTube music channel in 2019. Your kids are really very talented in music!

Take care, and don't stress out too much about the taxes and accounts right now. That can wait till later.

Lee · Postby **Lee** » Thu Dec 08, 2022 4:22 pm

Rikimaroo wrote:Good morning guys,

So in the process of "cleaning up" i'm having a hard time figuring out what to do with all the medical supplies my husband was given from hospice. He had a colostomy bag & so we got A LOT of supplies. I would love to help someone out by shipping out these supplies.. hope this is not something weird I'm offering? I don't know but i feel like throwing it out is a waste & that it could help someone else out. This includes diapers, colostomy bags, & many other little supplies that goes with this. They were not used or opened. Am really hoping it's not weird ...

Am hoping to hear from someone ... even if it is to tell me "you're crazy Ruth, you don't offer those things to anyone" ... lol

Sincerely,
Ruth
GoFundMe link:
please contact poster via PM - ccmc
Celebrating Narine's fun life moments:
https://youtu.be/mGlvKLRDzok

Hi Ruth,

Please accept my condolences on the passing of you husband. He was a good man.

Regarding ostomy supplies, there are organizations out there that will gladly accept your left overs ostomy supplies and give them to people who need them.

https://www.ostomy.org/

You might want to click on the above link. It will take you to UOAA (United Ostomy Association of America). Someone at that site should be able to direct you to the right people/organization.

Good luck and again please accept my condolences on the passing of your husband.

Lee

Sunnycd · Postby **Sunnycd** » Sun Dec 11, 2022 9:34 am

Oh, Ruth, I am so so sorry. I just watched the video and it was so great to see his face and his family! His posts helped many through our own journeys, and I could see his love for you whenever he mentioned “my lovely wife”. I gave away all my supplies to my hospital (after reversal), when I went to my docs appt, but I checked w the nurse in advance.

As for everything else, take it day by day. You don’t need to have it all figured out in 1 day, a week, a month. When my dad passed, we started with the most pressing parts, and left all the other parts (donating, cleaning up, etc) for later. 8 years later, my mom is still organizing, one drawer at a time.

Sending my love to you and your family, Sunny