July 22, 2022 I went in for surgery convinced my cancer was contained in the Sigmoid. When I woke up my husband told me the news. Apparently, my tumor had escaped the colon and they found a second tumor in addition to 23 of 42 lymph nodes were infected with cancer as well. Why didn't the tests show lymph nodes show up? Why didn't they know it had left the colon? What about the second tumor? Why should I trust this entire system? Do I need a PET Scan next? MRI?
My mind is spinning, moment to moment my thoughts and plans change. As I sit here recovering from major surgery, I have no idea what my life looks like anymore.
4aN2b . Stage 3. Folfox here I come. Or should I ?
Before my routine colonoscopy on June 2, 2022 I was living my best life. Empty Nest!!! Finally doing me !!! Always putting everyone else first, it was my turn to do ME! What does doing me look like ? Do I have three years? Five? Will I waste a year doing Chemo that will cause health issues I never had?
I am all over the place. I am angry, scared, worried! I want to completely ignore this and live my life... I want to travel, I want to see things I have never seen. I also want to see my children have children. Ugh!!!!