I’m married, but this would be my strategy (which I’d probably throw out the window when the time comes, but interesting to consider).
Date 1 - no mention of the C word. Just have fun. See if you like each other.
Date 2 - I’d probably tell her that I had been diagnosed with cancer. Doing treatment, or not; whatever the situation is right now. Don’t dwell on it, but I’d struggle to talk openly about my life and who I am without at least bringing it up.
Date 3 - if things look like they’re going somewhere a bit more serious, cards on the table. Stage, prognosis, etc. I think that’s fairer on both people; if she bows out at that point then fair enough. Otherwise, she’s along for the ride.
Of course this is ENTIRELY individual and up to you; I don’t think there’s a “wrong” approach.
Enjoy the date!
2018 Dx RC, 12cm high
Mod diff, EMVI, LVI. 4 liver mets
pT3N1aM1a Stage IVa. MSS NRAS G13R
CEA: Nov-18= 14; then ~2. Nov-21: 5.4
11/18 FOLFOX x6
3/19 Liver resection
5/19 25x pelvic IMRT radiation
7/19 ULAR & ileo, 1/27 LN
8/19 Liver lesion
8/19 FOLFOX, FOLFOXIRI, FOLFIRI x7
12/19 Liver resection
2/20 Ileo reversed
11/21 Liver met & celiac node; 2-3 tiny lung things, indeterminate
3/22 Nodal spread & 3 liver lesions. Lymphadenectomy
4/22 Liver SBRT x 5