Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

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BeckyH
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Nov 26, 2016 12:19 pm

Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby BeckyH » Tue Sep 18, 2018 10:28 pm

I’m not sure why I decided to read some research articles tonight. Maybe because there were some newer
Literature reviews and research about my specific type of cancer. I went so far as to dig out my care plan and realized that I need to correct my signature here. And according to at least one article I have a zero percent chance of living 5 years from surgery. For any of my friends that are curious, I am Stage 3, T4a, N2b with 35/56 lymph nodes affected. I am currently 2 years, 7 months, and 10 days Post resection.

Generally I do a good job of living in the moment. Right now, I feel like I need to update my will.

I am so glad to be alive and I RELISH the time with my husband and 12 and 15 year old. And I hate this disease that messes with my head when my house is quiet. I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.

DX: Suspected Colon Cancer January 29, 2016
2/8/16: Removed 17" Colon (Sigmoid area) & 1"Rectum & 58 lymph nodes
2/12/16: CA in 35/58 lymph nodes
Cancer: Stage 3C T4aN2b
Path: Signet Ring Cell Adenocarcinoma
Chemo: 12 rounds of FOLFOX, (3/17/16 to August, 2016) Leukovorin DC'd after WBC decrease.
Scans: F/U scans every 3 months initially, then every 4, now every 6 months. All NED. Next December 2018
CEA: Stable b/t 1 and 2
DX: Suspected Colon Cancer January 29, 2016
2/8/16: Removed 17" Colon (Sigmoid area) & 1"Rectum & 58 lymph nodes
2/12/16: CA in 35/58 lymph nodes
Cancer: Stage 3C T3N2B
Path: Signet Ring Cell Adenocarcinoma
Chemo: 12 rounds of FOLFOX, (3/17/16 to August, 2016) Leukovorin DC'd after WBC decrease.
Scans: F/U scans every 3 months; last one 8/2017--All NED.
CEA: Stable b/t 1 and 2

stu
Posts: 1441
Joined: Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:46 pm

Re: Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby stu » Wed Sep 19, 2018 1:43 am

Just because your human . Bound by our humanity. That’s why we do things that unsettle our wellbeing. I think anyway!!!
My mum’s other shoe had already dropped way back . They hammered home that she would need to get into the top five percent of chemo responders, then it was an ever lower percentage for surgery and that was before we got to overall survival stats . Certainly back in 2009 it was not too bright a forecast .
In 2017 she is doing well all things considered . Turns out she is quite good at pushing statsical boundaries . Someone has to be the force of change . Seems to me that it might actually be you . So instead of reading old stats you are in the business or rewriting current ones . Keep up the good work and long may you scan well .
Stu
supporter to my mum who lives a great life despite a difficult diagnosis
stage4 2009 significant spread to liver
2010 colon /liver resection
chemo following recurrence
73% of liver removed
enjoying life treatment free
2016 lung resection
Oct 2017 nice clear scan . Two lung nodules disappeared
Oct 2018. Another clear scan .

hiker
Posts: 139
Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 10:15 am

Re: Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby hiker » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:01 am

I'm certainly no doctor, but I would say you've already beat the statistics. You're 2 1/2 years post-surgery and still NED with no recurrences. That sounds very promising to me. Forget what you've read and live a long, full life.

I'll be here to wish you well in December when you get another clear scan and 5 years from now.
Colonoscopy 2/17, 5cm tumor descending
Diagnosed stage iv, liver mets 3/17
Colon resection 3/17
Told surgery not an option, get my affairs in order
Meet w/MSK team 5/01/17
Folfox(3rds) 5/17-6/17
Liver resection/implant HAI pump 7/17
HAI pump chemo(5rds) 8/17-2/18
Folfiri+Vectibix(11rds) 8/17-2/18
Spot on chest CT 10/17
Lung biopsy (that was fun) 11/17
Nocardia bacterial infection w/spread to brain (this is serious) 11/17
IV antibiotics 12/17-2/18
Oral antibiotics 3/18-12/18
Clear of cancer since surgery

Dori W
Posts: 34
Joined: Mon Aug 25, 2014 2:30 pm
Facebook Username: Dori Woodhouse

Re: Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby Dori W » Wed Sep 19, 2018 3:59 pm

I did the same thing! Over and over again...I felt like I couldn't stop! It is so hard.

I had a similar diagnosis: signet ring, stage 3c, 14 of 18 nodes affected. I recall my oncologist saying that if I made it to two years without a recurrence, she would feel much more optimistic. It's now been over ten years since I was diagnosed and I still haven't had a recurrence.

Try to stay off the internet. If you are like I was, this seems impossible, but try anyway.

Take care,
Dori
Diagnosed stage 3C signet ring colon cancer in May, 2008
14 out of 18 positive lymph nodes
Final treatment in November, 2008
NED ever since
I used to have an account under "Dori," but I've lost access to it.
You can view my old posts here: search.php?author_id=1446&sr=posts

Cmac1275
Posts: 55
Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 4:21 pm

Re: Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby Cmac1275 » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:43 pm

Dori W wrote:
Try to stay off the internet. If you are like I was, this seems impossible, but try anyway.



+1 to this.

I went from doing very little research...just following doctors orders, so to speak...to now spending entirely too much time each day online researching all things cancer. Of course, you have to be your own advocate. So, this isn’t entirely a bad thing. But I’ve had a few weeks now where the positive and oblivious mindset that has carried me so far has been tested.

To me, the psychological war cancer plays on us is just the worse. Just gotta try and do your best to manage and avoid situations that will drive your anxiety north. Like others have stated, you have a lot to feel good and positive about considering you’re NED 2.5 years.
42 yr, male, husband and father of 3
DX Stage IV Colon Cancer Jan 2018
Multiple liver mets
KRAS G13D / MSS

Jan 2018 Partial colon resection
Mar 2018 FOLFOX + Avastin | CEA 60.1
July 2018 Partial liver resection | CEA 4.7
Sep 2018 Recurrence in liver | CEA 2.9
Oct 2018 FOLFOX + Avastin
Nov 2018 Stopping FOLFOX. New mets | CEA 4.3
Dec 2018 Beginning AbbVie ABT-165 Trial

crikklekay
Posts: 104
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2018 9:47 am
Location: Richmond, VA

Re: Why do I torture myself? Signet Ring Cell Sigmoid Colon

Postby crikklekay » Thu Sep 20, 2018 3:16 pm

My husband has the same staging except he's N2a since it was just 6 out of 22 affected. I remember sitting in the hospital room the evening after he was diagnosed and thinking I would feel better with facts, I'm generally calmer if I know what's going on and feel in control. I'll never forget opening the page for the American Cancer Society and reading that colon cancer was the second most deadly in America and I slammed my laptop close. Since then I can't bring myself to look at statistics, it causes me too much anxiety. In his cancer journey I have found that that the internet is NOT my friend though I'm grateful I found this board.

Congrats on being cancer free for 2 1/2 years! I hope you continue to be cancer-free, and you're halfway to the 5-year mark which is good!
Caring for DH John
Colon Cancer, Sigmoid colon
Adenocarcinoma
G2, Moderately differentiated w/invasion of visceral peritoneum
Stage IIIC
Positive lymph nodes: 6/22
Chemotherapy: FOLFOX (6)
12/17 ER and emergency surgery
02/18 Hospital w/ MSSA infected port, PICC line inserted, chest CT scan showed septic emboli & blood clots
03/18 Hospital w/ CDIFF
04/18 Chest CT scan clear
06/18 Colonoscopy Clear
08/18 CT Scan Clear, NEMD
06/19 Colonoscopy Clear
08/19 CT Scan Clear
08/20 CT Scan Clear


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