Reality has hit me

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Reality has hit me

Postby sharpey92 » Wed Feb 19, 2014 11:38 am

This post may annoy some people so i apologise in advance.

Had a bit of thinking today and I have come to the conclusion that i am a Hypochondriac, if im honest to myself ive convinced myself i have something such as cancer, (please note i havn't lied about my symptoms at all, everything i post is genuine) when in reality i more than likley havn't got anything sinister wrong with me.

I feel really bad for jumping the gun and comparing myself to the brave people that are fighting the dreadful disease that is cancer. Im not like everyone on this forum, im not brave.

I feel that i have wasted everyones time, the doctors, yours and my family.

Again im sorry for being a moaning worrier and i respect every single one of you more than anything, you are the bravest people i have ever had the chance of speaking to.

I will post my results for my flexi sig next week and i thank you all so much for your time again you are all amazing people and you are all in my prayers.


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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby Lee » Wed Feb 19, 2014 11:49 am

Personally, I think you should really push for a colonoscopy.

Having pain is not normal. Do you have cancer. I don't know. But if you want to find a true solution to what is happening to you. See the GI doc and get a colonoscopy. Only then will you get a true diagnoses of what is causing your pain/problems.

For what it's worth, I had no pain at my diagnoses, only occasional rectal bleeding. Many yrs early, my mother ended up in the ER with major stomach pain and lots of rectal bleeding. A colonoscopy determined she had a bad case of diverticulosis. She changed her diet, problem solved. BUTT it was the colonoscopy that gave both of us a true diagnoses.

rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby dianne052506 » Wed Feb 19, 2014 4:45 pm

I do not think you are a hypochondriac. I think you are someone who is aware of what is "normal" for his own body and is rightly concerned when that "normal" suddenly changes. And, BTW, pain is never normal.
I'm sorry for not writing this earlier but I would have been ballistic over a secretary calling that the doctor "had a change of heart" and therefore wanted to change a procedure he had previously deemed medically necessary and scheduled for me. The second "change of heart" would have put me over the top. I don't know if I would have been snarky and asked if he was reading his horoscope to determine your procedure, or if I would have been able to stay pissed but calm and demand a medical explanation for the change in the medical procedure.
Either way, I wish you the very best.
May 06 Stage IV CC: liver,ovarian mets
Oct 07 inoperable lung mets
Feb 08 - Apr'12 chemo
allergic to oxaliplatin, irinotecan
Aug '12-Feb'14 Genentech PD-L1/Avastin trial
Mar '14 -radiation to largest lung nodule
still recovering; looking at trials again

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby BrownBagger » Wed Feb 19, 2014 4:53 pm

You're also uncommonly gracious.

Trust me, being concerned about your health is no vice, nor is it a waste of anyone's time. Ignore symptoms, and bad things can happen. I know this from experience.

Good luck & here's hoping it's nothing.
Eric, 58
Dx: 3/09, Stage 4 RC
Recurrences: (ongoing, lung, bronchial cavity, ribs)
Major Ops: 6/ RFA: 3 /bronchoscopies: 8
Pelvic radiation: 5 wks. Bronchial radiation—brachytheray: 3 treatments
Chemo Rounds (career):136
Current Chemo Cocktail: Xeloda & Erbitux & Irinotecan biweekly
Current Cocktail; On the Wagon (mostly)
Bicycle miles post-dx 10,477
Motto: Live your life like it's going to be a long one, because it just might, and then you'll be glad you did.

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby Val*pal » Wed Feb 19, 2014 4:54 pm

You're not wasting anyone's time. If you feel something is wrong, then by all means look into it. Granted, it's unlikely you have colon cancer, but it's better to be sure. There's a whole range of colon problems that you may have, some of which can lead to irritation and possibly (?) to cancer. Better to be safe than sorry.

My mom was someone who was so afraid of getting some horrible disease that sometimes she over reacted, so I get it if you are (maybe) over reacting. I guess some people are just more inclined to be frightened by symptoms someone else takes for granted. However, I have to say, my mom made it to 89 without any real disease, so all her worries were for nothing. Because I was raised by my mom, I went in the opposite direction. I tend to discount all symptoms until something finally hits me over the head to tell me I'm sick. I have to admit, though, that since my husband was diagnosed with CC, I freak out if I have even a slight gastro symptom.

Please let us know your test results.
DH dx'ed May '11, age 62
Jul '11: resection Stage IV
10/11: 6 mo Folfox
8/12:thyr canc, surg/tx
2/13: peri mets
2/13: Firi/Avas
6/13: Ok
8/13: break
10/13: Lung, peri, mets
10/13: Firi/Erb
1/14: Erb Fail; spread
5/14: Tx stopped
6/20/14: At rest

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby sharpey92 » Thu Feb 20, 2014 6:28 am

Lost for words at the responses but I had to write back.

Going a bit off topic but thought i would share this with all of you

A strange thing happened last night, to cut a long story short when my Grandmother passed away a few close members of my family started noticing a small moth would appear now and then, literally tiny but it would bring comfort to us all (basically would thought of this moth as my grandmother, i know a bit strange) anyway a few months have roughly passed and no sign of a moth from any of us, but last night i was sat on my doorstep just having a think to myself and just randomly a little moth made an appearance and i just had a wave of calm and peace come over me, i know this has nothing to do with the current topic but thought i would just share this little story with you all, (which is completly mad i know but completly true) I believe that people we have lost always give a little sign that they are always with us and always there when we need them most, in my case a moth which randomly appeared about a week after my grandma passed and is always there to just give us a bit of guidence in tough times.

I dont know if it is a sign of anything or just there to make me smile but either way it makes me happy to see it and nobody can take that away from me.

Thank you all again so much for the replies and Brownbagger thank you cant recall anyone every calling me ''uncommonly gracious'' ill take that as a compliment :)

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby sharpey92 » Thu Feb 20, 2014 7:40 am

O and the blood has returned today

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Re: Reality has hit me

Postby alphagam » Thu Feb 20, 2014 9:57 am


There is obviously a problem, probably not Colon Cancer. My 29 year old daughter has recently had bleeding, slight pain, and scared to death. I told her to fight tooth and nail to get a colonoscopy based on my history. Her doc was great, referred her to my surgeon for a colonoscopy. She is a TINY person, 4'4" tall, 73 pounds so we all thought a face to face meeting was best. Surgeon was thankful for that, but agreed. Long story short, colon was squeaky clean, but she had two hemmoroids. She is such a worrier, but now she knows to add fiber. Colonoscopy is the gold standard. Push for it!

Dx Feb 2010 4 cm tumor, just inside rectum
EUS stated T3 tumor
2nd opinion, need better path
Mar 2010 transanal surgery. Surgery by board certified CRS found tumor only in lining
6 exams of surg site, 3 PET, 3 scopes laterNED.
Scope in Mar2015, clean colon
Next scope/test in 3 years

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