LA or Bust?

[CryBaby]

A couple of months ago, I posted a note with regards to uncontrollable fits of crying at my workplace. I thought it might have something to do with the promotion at my company to a sales position a week before being diagnosed and undergoing surgery. A month ago, I decided to take disability for the remainder portion of my treatment. Only three left! Since taking time off, I have not had not cried like I did at work. I have been enjoying the time to myself and the time to heal. Still, I now know I do not want to go back to my old job. I made most of my commissions advertising menthol cigarettes. That’s just not right!!!

After a month of soul searching and trying to figure out what I want to do with my life, I decided to make a career change. I’m interested in finding a job where I can help people. In particular, I’ve been looking into foundations that raise money to help other people with cancer, diabetes, HIV, children…etc…. Basically, a job where I can give back to society and wake up motivated. Furthermore, I decided to move to Los Angeles. I have lived in NYC for 8 years and it’s time for a change (I grew up in TX). I chose LA because I have a ton of friends out there and my parent’s are close by. (I am only 30). I know it’s the city with my second biggest support group.

Still, my oncologist at Sloan-Kettering does not recommend I move so quickly after finishing treatment and my first PET and CAT scans. She has warned me twice about my advanced Stage 3CN2 and the high possibilities of recurrence. She also has reminded me about the incredible group of friends and family (sister, husband, nieces) who live in New York and have stood by me through this experience. I’m an extremely optimistic person and always look for the best in any situation. In my mind, I’m done with cancer …although I know that might not be the truth. Still, I can’t see myself staying in NYC and waiting to get sick again. I want to live my life and do all the things I have wanted to do but not had enough courage to do on my own…like moving and making a career change.

Anyway, I think I have written a novel here. Please let me know what you think I should do.

Thanks!!!

[Molly]

Hey CryBaby!

Given the fact that any one of us could step out in front of a bus TOMORROW, I think you should go with your heart. You can ALWAYS change your mind, right???

[northern lights]

I think you answered your own question in the third paragraph (In my mind, I am done with cancer....). You are still young and if you have the adventure in you then you should follow your heart.

At the same time, think about your health coverage because you don't want to take a giant leap of faith and not have a soft place to land.

Good luck
Sharon

[Christine]

Hi Crybaby,

As someone who picked up and moved to LA three years ago, I say go for it - as long as you have some medical coverage or a way to pay medical bills. And it may not be Sloan Kettering, but the UCLA Jonsson Comprehensive Cancer Center (http://www.cancer.mednet.ucla.edu) is ranked in the top 10 in the country. We also have the USC/Norris Cancer Center (http://ccnt.hsc.usc.edu) and City of Hope (http://www.cityofhope.org). I know people who have received excellent treatment at all of these facilities. I am personally a patient (stage IV) at UCLA and am very happy with the care I've received.

I'm three rounds away from finishing treatment too and I will not be going back to my old job (I've been on disability since Aug 2005). I'm applying for my master's degree in Public Health specializing in Health Services - Policy. Similar to you, after having gone through all this crap, I am very motivated to get out there and make some changes.

Anyway, if I can answer any questions about maintenance scans or support groups in the LA area, let me know.

[Erika]

Dear Crybaby-

On the one hand I can see your oncologist's point-of-view, but she's thinking about this from a physician's perspective, not that of a patient.

You can ask yourself "what if it comes back?" and make decisions accordingly.

But "what if it doesn't?"

Only YOU can truely decide for yourself whether moving to LA is the best decision. I've dealt with these issues myself, moving out of my "medical comfort zone" more than once, but it was necessary for me to move on, follow my dreams, and not let cancer run my life. If heaven forbid, the cancer returns, I (or you) will deal with it then. But I can't imagine having lived the last 6 years of my life out of fear of "what if". I worked too hard to beat cancer to continue to live under 'cancer's rule' - same for you.

Best of luck,
Erika

[Edward]

My best friend from college was diagnosed with leukemia in the mid-90's. In that time he fathered two children, served on his city's council, served as mayor, started his own consulting firm, and obtained a law degree. Here is a post of what someone said upon learning of his death on 2/21/2006.

Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Ventnor, NJ formerly Minersville
Time: 2000-02-22 19:33:22
Comments: I just checked out Schuylkill Online and learned of the death of Pottsville's Mayor Terry Reiley. Terry was a true Schuylkill Countian, his pride in his hometown and county were only over-matched by his love of family and friends. I remember asking Terry to join us as a celebrity bartender, at Rumors, for a Half Way to St Patrick's Day Promotion. He showed up dressed all in green, urging people to spend money and tip even more, (all the money raised went to a local charity)he single-handedly made the event a huge success because he convinced people it was ST PATTY'S DAY.... I never had the heart to tell him that it was September 17 NOT March 17. Terry; all of NEPA lost a leader and a friend--you'll never be forgotten. P.S.-I'll "have one" in your honor on St Patty's Day. God Bless Terry's parents, his wife & children, his brother and his countless number of friends.

Interestingly, he was mayor of Pottsville PA, home of Yuengling Beer. He wore Pottsville on sleave.