Hang in there, we are in the same boat, sometimes wondering if our paddle will fall in the water, or it tries to fall in the water and we grab it right before it does and keep on moving. The struggle is definitely real!! LOL...
I also have my ups and downs. There are times when I am watching a movie, or youtube video or old pictures of myself before cancer struct me and I ask myself what the hell happened?? How did this happen to me?? Why Lord?? The colostomy, or the port on my chest, or the infusions of avastin every 3 weeks, or the xeloda pills every other 7 days, or the taking pills to control gas or everything that is now my normal compared to the easier normal life I had before 2016 cross my mind daily and remind me daily and sometimes discourages me daily, but I press on, for my family, for myself...
Oh and yes, there is some grump in me, I can be that grumpy old troll, I hate it, especially if I am feeling abdomen discomfort. Really makes you a grump. I usually hide in my man cave when I am a grump.
We got this I just need 30 more years, LOL...
RC T3N1M0 12/16
MSS - NRAS Mutation
Chemo Rad, CCR - W&W 5/2017
CT Scan 11/2017 Liver Met 5.5cm Stable, Stage IV
Port Scheduled for 12/2017, folfox - avastin 12/2017
LAR/Liver Resect 4/2018
Chemo Finish 8/2018
CEA highest 500, lowest .8 throughout process, waiting for latest
Recurrence left vesical/pelvic sidewall - 10/7/2019 resect perm bag,
FolFiri 11/6 - 5 rounds
CEA rise Feb/May 3.7, 8.8, 30, Recurrence in Pelvic
Maintenance Chemo begin 6/3/20 FolFiri