Scared

[Trying]

I feel since i found out about my peri met i am beyond discouraged about a cure. One member was so kind to point out a new procedure but its not in canada or even the us yet.
My anxiety is too much. I read about others getting cured and am so happy for them but wonder if it will eber happen for me. Im scared. I just need to raise my boy. Im so scared of this taking me. Please give me hope. Im so private in my life except here. I let it all out to you guys. How the hexk do i get rid of my cancer if they keep just talking chemo. Im at q major center and 3rd oncologist who is top head of the hospital. I dont know what im looking for. Maybe words of encouragement. I dont know. I feel awful. Maybe uts just one of those days. Sorry if i brought anyone down.

Nicole

[AmyG]

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time.

Did you and your son do something fun today? Make a pillow fort, maybe an inside picnic? Build a snowman then come in for a hot drink and something sweet?

I hope tomorrow is better for you.

[Trying]

Im sure tomorrow will be better. Thank you for your reply

[CRguy]

... Sorry if i brought anyone down.
Nicole

Hey sista' you did not bring us down
you could not have raised US any higher ...
by being able to be here FOR you and WITH you
and 'cos collectively we ARE with you

... and YOU
are one of us

just how it works here on the CTalk !

any thing
any time
any how

we are here for you
and you are here for us
WORD !

PM or email me anytime

CRguy on the Journey

[Trying]

Thank you so much for the message

Nicole

[Punky44]

So sorry you are having a particularly hard day. Keeping you in my prayers!

I know people with anxiety (like me) struggle with uncertainties and the unknown. No matter how bad you want to know the answer, you can’t and that sucks because it makes you feel powerless and unable to make plans. But, we have to remember that no one is guaranteed anything—not to be morbid but the non cancer patient next door could get hit by a bus tomorrow (though I hope this doesn’t happen to your hypothetical neighbor.) I just hope this helps reframe your thinking that life is really out of control for everyone and so since we can’t control it, we can only enjoy living it.

[brokenwings]

Hi again Nicole,

The reason I pointed out PIPAC is that I thought you had plenty of peri mets and therefore you were not eligible for CRS and HIPEC yet.
But if you only have 1 peri met, why didn't your doctors suggest surgery? Maybe they're waiting for your liver mets to disappear?

In any case, if you only have 1 peri met they should suggest surgery at one point.

Could you tell me more precisely what are the reasons your doctors refuse surgery?

A big hug,

Paola

[stu]

Hope you are having a better day today .

Some days are just plain rubbish . Hope it’s eased a bit .

take care,

Stu

[DarknessEmbraced]

I'm sending big hugs your way!*hugs* I'm sorry you're having such a hard time and hope today is better for you.

[Trying]

I think they are waiting for ly liver mets to be operable before peri met

You are all so helpful and i dont know how i would do this without you all

[AppleTree]

I was so sick in Austria. My doctors asked if I had made arrangements for my son. I think other countries are just straight up frank. Not that they were saying I was dying, but that I would have less stress knowing these things were taken care of. And you know what...whatever you set up, you can change down the road, if you want. It is just a precaution that your baby is taken care of. Take care of this and you will have alot less to worry about. In this 1 area, maybe we are luckier than the random person being killed by a bus, because we actually have time to consider and prepare a plan for our children. My son has a binder with nationality papers, 2 passports (dual citizen), his and my social security cards, our birth certificates, my medical power of attorney and power of attorney to my chosen people including immediate access to my bank accounts, pass #s for all my debit cards, etc., simple will, and guardianship papers for my son should I be unable to care for him. This is all in a safety deposit box that is accessible by 2 family members. Copies at my lawyers.

I remember when I sent him to my sister and he came to the hospital to say goodbye before going to the airport. I could not even raise my head. And I was very sad, but hid that from him. But I DID get better and now we live together again. But just in case...my safeguards are in place and if I ever have another scare, at least I will not have to worry about his care. And believe me, nobody is going to fight over a moody teenager (my son), but maybe his finances. So, best to have it all spelled out and that is one huge worry off your mind so you can concentrate on YOU.

I hope you will have better days coming up. I know it seems like we worry about strange things, but we have a strange journey.

[boxhill]

trying, what are your tumor genetics? BRAF and KRAS wild-type or mutated? MSS or MSI? Are you possibly a candidate for immunotherapy? I know there are some issues around obtaining it in Canada at this point, but some people have been able to get it on a humanitarian basis from the manufacturer.

Honestly, I think you ought to know definitely why your doctors do not recommend surgery right now, and know what the plan is to get you to an operable state. I can't see that more uncertainty is going to do anything to help you with your--totally understandable--anxiety.