CrossfitChick1980 wrote:My DH said it so simply, "So, we are here." The mets in his liver are growing, despite one round of chemo, he has ascites and is very confused. His bilirubin is through the roof and after a lengthy conversation, he said he wanted to just go home and do hospice. My question for any caregiver, when did you know it was the end? I know hospice will give us a general idea but he is so confused and so frail, I dont think he will last much longer. Any information is appreciated.
sending posi +++vibes to your whole family right now
In a bit of a dark space myself BUTT.... need to chime in with any help I can offer.
First, he "knows" despite the confusion, as we all must know .... when we are near.
The liver issues will cloud the brain
due to body chemistry etc. ... just the way it seems to go sometimes
BUTT yes, I am sorry to say, he knows.
caregivers ? we don't "want to know"
BUTT ... we NEED to know... to be there
JUST to be there ...
my experiences encompass 2 basic situations :
1. strong "mind" and failing "body"
2. strong "body" and failing "mind"
... which both ultimately led to a failing of both mind and body
My question for any caregiver, when did you know it was the end?
when the good moments are outnumbered by the bad
when the pain exceeds what we can control
when the one we love is .. " no longer there..."
when the treatment is worse than the affliction
when our loved one says " ... enough, ... I am ready to pass "
when .... enough has been enough
and we have done all we can do
when I need you
to set me free
that is the greatest
act of love
that you can do
forever in your heart ....
Love Peace and Harmony
always on the Journey with you