Being on the pump for 46 hours is a bit of a PITA to me, but not a huge deal. I shower and wash my hair, etc in the morning before infusion, and just wait until it is off to shower again. The first night I slept with it I put it on the table next to the bed and was uneasy. I was afraid I would do something to kink the hose, it would fall on the floor, etc etc. I kept checking it all the time during the day. The next two cycles I've pretty much ignored it. I put it on the bed--in the middle, so I don't have to worry about it falling off--and forget about it until morning. I do, as they suggest, take an Ativan the night of infusion to counteract the steroid in the infusion and help me sleep.
It sounds to me as if you should use Ativan, if they've given you a prescription, and talk to them about your reaction to the pump. Can you talk to a counselor?
From what I've been reading here, people seem to suffer much worse side effects with Xeloda.
F, 64 at DX CRC Stage IV (or "3 1/2" per Dana Farber consult, LOL)
3/17/18 blockage, emergency surgery, r hemicolectomy
11 of 25 nodes
5 of 5 mesentery nodes, matted
0.5 cm sub-capsular liver met removed
pT3 pN2b pM1
Neg CEA, neg BRAF, KRAS G12D, germline mut ATM
dMMR, MSI-H, Neg for Lynch
5/4/18 FOLFOX started
Added Neulasta 6/28/18
7/9/18 CT scans show no masses or enlarged nodes, 2mm indeterminate lung nodule