Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

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Arrack979
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2014 9:14 am

Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby Arrack979 » Wed Apr 18, 2018 5:56 pm

I've been completely panicing lately. Consistently had lots of issues after reversal and over immodiumed, got constipated and then had a series of painful bowel movements that left me throbbing after. Moved and need to change Dr., finally have initial GI appt tomorrow evening.

I've been SO panicked this time ever since I noticed mucus after this episode. I've had terrible pain ever since, after every bowel movement painful spasming that last for hours.

This is comsuming me. I'm literally shaking, having terrible stomach cramp and diarehhea, with more and more mucus and pain, giving myself multiple rectal exam AND feeling a lump/bump inside - even had to leave work to day becasue I literally crapped my pants in the middle of meeting (made it halfway to the bathroom).

I've become completely obssesseed. Everytime I see more mucus of think of the lump I felt inside I literally get sick. I'm spenidng hours each day researching the internet, hoping to convince myself it's just a fissure and/or hemmroids - ANYTHING but a recurrence! Read one article and statistically I'm at good odds given prognostic factors, etc., read another and I see fissure for men are on 1% anterior and that's where my tumor was.

I always get nervous (as many of us do) before routine test, but get obsessed over pains/aches fearing it's back.

Logically, I know there is nothing to do, but go to the Dr. and find out the truth one way or another. I know I shouldn't borrow trouble. I know I'll regret the worry either way, but I'm in pain and with every bowel movement (3-6x/day on average) I get reminded of it.

Being ~ 3.5 years out from surgery I though I'd be better, but the reality is given my MSI-H status, etc. a local recurrence is BAD news and the mucus set it off as that was the first symptom I had originally - it's like a form of PTSD.

*********
What do you guys do to deal with the anxiety? It's affecting my job, my marriage, my life - everything!!! Just a month ago I felt fantastic, now I'm in panic mode again and I keep cycling in and out of it.

I'm thinking of seeing a therapist or something to help me deal and get my head on straight, any suggestions as to a certain type or other ideas.

BTW, I also feel guilty being so afraid when (like every other time) it cold turned out to be nothing, and there are those who have real problems to worry about.

I'm ruining my life either way and feel totally out of control - any advice???
35 yo Male
Rectal Cancer IIIb
28 rounds Radiation + Xeloda
TME LAR & temp ileostomy 11/19/2014
yp stage IIIa - 0/19 LN's T3N0M0
FOLFOX - 8 rounds, completed 4/17/2015
Reversal - 7/15/15
CEA: 5.0 pre-treatment; 1.2, 1.3, 1.3, 1.0, 0.9, 1.1, 1.5, 1.3, 1.6 (Change to Roche vs. Bayer)
Scan:10/13/15 - Lung "spot" indeterminable watch and wait (later determined to be a cyst)
Scan: 4/18/16 - Clear
Scan: 4/12/17 - Clear
Scan: 2/26/18 - Clear

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby Aqx99 » Wed Apr 18, 2018 6:21 pm

I have been seeing the oncology counselor at my cancer center for a while. She referred me to a psychiatric nurse practitioner when we felt medication was needed.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

zephyr
Posts: 363
Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2016 7:31 am

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby zephyr » Wed Apr 18, 2018 7:45 pm

Full disclosure: I haven't been through a reversal so ... basically ... I probably don't know what I'm talking about. That said, after I started chemo I remember telling my gastroenterologist that I was noticing a lot of mucus. He said the colon is basically a mucus factory. Could be (maybe?) that your system is re-setting and adjusting to a new normal. As for counseling, I also see the oncology social worker at the hospital and she has been a tremendous help. Since she only deals with cancer patients, she's pretty much heard it all and can offer practical advice or just an understanding shoulder to cry on. Sometimes you really need to talk to someone outside of family and friends who really "gets" what you're experiencing. You might also consider wearing Depends until your system straightens out. It's the only way I am able to get through meetings/events without being completely preoccupied with what's going on inside my pants. Keep an extra Depends in your car for those times when you need to change.

Hope this helps.
Nov-2009 Early stage CRC, routine colonoscopy
2010-2014 F/U colonoscopies, all clear
Jun-2016 CRC during F/U colonoscopy, surgery, Stage 4, KRAS, MSS
Aug-2016-May-2018 Folfox, 5FU, Folfiri & Avastin
Aug/Sep-2018 YAG laser surgeries (Germany), 11 nodules removed
Nov-2018 clean CT scan
Mar-2019 New lung nodules
Apr-2019 Dec-2020 Xeloda/Avastin, SBRT, cont. Xeloda/Avastin
Mar-2021 Forfiri/Avastin
Mar-2022 Ablation & Thoracotomy
Feb-2023 Folfiri & Avastin
Nov-2023 Xeloda & Avastin

AppleTree
Posts: 267
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 8:16 am

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby AppleTree » Thu Apr 19, 2018 3:58 am

I saw a psychiatrist DR a few months ago through my regular medical clinic and he prescribed a low dose anti depressant/anti anxiety. It has helped me a lot and when I get through this, I can always go off.

I had my reversal and then a year later had a met, so am doing Folfox with no stoma. I always leave the house with a little bag of depends, wipes and dark pants that will match my top. 99% of the time I do not need it now, but having it gives me an extra sense of security.

My oncologist started ordering Sandostatin shots for me and it has helped my diarrhea tremendously. But does it ever hurt for at least a week at the injection site. I have my 12th and final round of Folfox next week. 1 more shot and then I hope to go back to Lomotol pills instead.

Also, my diet is fairly limited and bland. I do better with small portions. I do not like eating out because I never know how it will agree with me, so I pack my own food.

I started having blood streaked stool this winter. My GI DR said it waz hemeroids. Then I had an episode of a blood in the toilet too. I asked for a Sig scope just to confirm that it was hemeroids. It was, phew! Having that scope put my mind at ease a lot. My last colonoscopy was this past summer, but I was still very worried.
Diag Feb 5, 2016 Age 45
3 cm tumor 5 cm from verge
Radiation + Xeloda pills - 3000mg 5x week
3/14 - 4/16 - 25 sessions
Shrank just over 50% L nodes 0/13
Remove rectum with temp Ileo 6/17
Reversal 7/20 due to infection
Acute hepatitis August. Chemo cancelled
June to September 2016 - 58 days in hospital

2017
6/16, MRI shadow in lung
Pet - 6.6mm Met in Upper R lobe
7/30 VAT surgery Mass General/Boston
8/24 port
8/30 - 4/28 Folfox. 12 rounds
2018
June CT shows new lung Mets.
July/Oct PETs...CLEAR!

User avatar
Atoq
Posts: 412
Joined: Wed Oct 25, 2017 9:31 am

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby Atoq » Thu Apr 19, 2018 10:18 am

I am waiting to get my reversal and therefore I do not have experience with that, but it is really good that you are getting checked soon so you will know for sure that everything is ok. About anxiety I think training helps me, I also try to accept that things happen alle the time and I want to have a nice time as much as I can while I can. I have two kids, two dogs and a husband, if my time will end soon, I don’t want to leave bad memories, as long as I am not in pain I am fine. I know it is easy to say and difficult to drive thoughts in one or another direction, but for me, by now, it works.

Best

Claudia
1972, 2 kids
Dx rectal cancer 10.2017
T3N2aMX (met left lung 8 mm)
Lynch neg
CEA 1.8
Neoadjuvant chemoradio Xeloda + 25x2 Gy
05.12.17 laparotomic surg. for blockage, colostomy
25.01.18 laparotomic lar, hysterectomy, ileostomy
05.03.18 core needle lung biopsy
07.05.18 CAT scan, lung met 11 mm
04.06.18 ileo reversal
26.06.18 wedge VATS
24.08.18, 31.02.19 CAT scan
12.09.18, 06.02.19 scope, CEA 1.6
19.11.18 scope
20.08.19 CAT, eco
13.09.19 scope, CEA 1.2
18.03.20 CAT, eco, scope, NED
29.11.20 CAT, NED
2023 NED

Basil
Posts: 275
Joined: Thu Mar 16, 2017 12:33 pm

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby Basil » Thu Apr 19, 2018 3:24 pm

This may seem obvious but I rely on Xanax. Never taken it before being diagnosed but I've had a couple of panic attacks in the last year and sometimes feel one coming on. The Xanax does the trick. I also take it before going into MDA for surveillance appointments.
40 y/o male (now 46), kids 11 & 14.
Dx 3/16/17, rectal cancer s3,t3,n1,m0
PROSPCT trial (FOLFOX in lieu of chemorad)
FOLFOX 4/5/17 - 6/26/17
LAR 7/31/17, temp ileo
pathological complete response
Adjuvant chemo cancelled (IDEA Study)
Ileo reversed 9/25/17
NED
1 year scans - clear
2 year scans - clear
3 year scans - clear
4 year scans - clear
5 year scans - clear (considered cured)

User avatar
CRguy
Posts: 10473
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby CRguy » Thu Apr 19, 2018 7:55 pm

Arrack979 wrote:I'm ruining my life either way and feel totally out of control - any advice???

Get help
Get professional counselling help with someone who can talk to you face to face.

WE ... can and WILL be here to support you ... BUTT
with a high level of anxiety and panic ....

You need to talk to a professional ! = WORD !

Many of us have done just that, me included my friend

you feel you are alone ... you are NOT alone
you feel helpless ... you are NOT helpless
you feel you have no control ... you HAVE control

just gonna "quote" myself here
viewtopic.php?f=1&t=59711#p474613

please read this post and PM me anytime

WE .. are here for you
BUTT ... YOU gotta take the first step

Harmony on the Journey bro'
CRguy
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
17 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far

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henry123
Posts: 218
Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2017 3:25 am

Re: Help dealing with Health Anxiety/Panic

Postby henry123 » Thu Apr 19, 2018 8:12 pm

My take on situation .

"Thy will is sweet to me , O Lord."
Guru Nanak.

Accept that this disease is part of you and every living creature.
If it is there , it is there. It's God will and we have to accept it cheerfully.

https://books.google.co.in/books?id=TZd ... na&f=false


At the same time, try to get best medical and psychiatric help that you can get and afford. That is our duty to our body and our family.
Please forgive if I am a bit blunt.
46yo M msi-high Lynch +ve
5/16 lap AR 14/21 L nodes +ve
T4N2M1
7/16 Capox 9 cyc
9/16 cea 2
1/17 550
PET CT mets in lung & peri
iri+ avast fail
3/17 10577
4/17 regro fail
5/17 cea 28800
5/17 CT inc in size of mes nodes ,onset of multi nodules in liver
6/17 Opdivo start
7/17 26754
8/17 5623
9/17 497
10/17 52
CT all clear exc a nodule in Lung. liver norm
1/18 3.6
Aspirin start
6/18 1.5 CT clear
12/18 1.1 NED
1/20 NED Opdivo stop
8/23 1.0 All ok


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