The Colon Club

An increasingly warped sense of humour could be an early warning sign of
impending dementia, say UK experts. The University College London study
involved patients with frontotemporal dementia, with the results appearing in the
Journal of Alzheimer's Disease.
http://www.bbc.com/news/health-34766361


Oh........

R - E - A - L - L - Y.............







Let the games begin and may the odds ever be in our favour!

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Maaaaate! Happy 'straya day
may we all still be here this time, next year

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A RETIREE'S LAST TRIP TO COSTCO!!

Yesterday I was at Costco, buying a large bag of
Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Owen,
the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a
woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an
elephant?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on
impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,
I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I
probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but
that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet
and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with
Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The food is nutritionally complete, (certified), so it works well and
I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically
everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped
to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

Well, I thought the guy behind her was going to have
a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch
what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to
think of crazy things to say.

Thanks for the laugh Mr. Case.

Somehow, I figured this comment would show up here ! Love you my sista nut !

Another Talking Dog Story:

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house:
'Talking Dog For Sale.'
He rings the bell & the owner appears & tells him the dog is in the backyard.
He goes into the backyard & sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says, "So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so...
I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping."
"I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a Bullshitter. He's never been out of the yard!"

Good one, BS! Ha! Dogs in covert operations.

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Don't we all love our doggie jokes

I realize this is dumb.
However, I laughed just the same.

It's so dumb it makes you laugh! hehehe

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