O/T Need to vent

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Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Lee » Wed Nov 15, 2017 12:49 pm

Aqx99 wrote:The insurance company will demand he return the rental now that the van has been totaled. They did the same thing the last time. I spoke with my insurance company this morning and was relieved to find out that they follow the driver when it comes to the points when determining premiums. That means that once he and his bad driving record are off the policy, my premium should drop considerably. I just paid the 6 month premium in August, I would not be surprised if they tell me I'm covered for a year or more.


How soon will he be off your insurance plan? Do you have any ideas what he's going to do next? Be think he is in something of a pickle :mrgreen:

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Aqx99 » Wed Nov 15, 2017 1:04 pm

Lee wrote:
Aqx99 wrote:The insurance company will demand he return the rental now that the van has been totaled. They did the same thing the last time. I spoke with my insurance company this morning and was relieved to find out that they follow the driver when it comes to the points when determining premiums. That means that once he and his bad driving record are off the policy, my premium should drop considerably. I just paid the 6 month premium in August, I would not be surprised if they tell me I'm covered for a year or more.


How soon will he be off your insurance plan? Do you have any ideas what he's going to do next? Be think he is in something of a pickle :mrgreen:

Lee


As soon as he calls them to do it, which I will hound him about until it is done. Apparently, even though the policy was mine originally, because I added a man he became the primary driver on the policy. So I can't remove him, he has to remove himself. I have no idea what he plans to do next, and frankly I don't care. I had to explain to him that he was not getting a big fat check from the insurance company, the bank was getting that. He doesn't make enough money to finance a car, and he has nothing in savings. So he is either going to borrow his parents' car for work or borrow money from them to get a piece of crap car. It is not my problem anymore.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Lee » Wed Nov 15, 2017 4:41 pm

Aqx99 wrote: . . . because I added a man he became the primary driver on the policy. . .


Sorry butt that is so sexist. Do you think he will honor what you ask? I sure hope so. Butt it's good to know one way or the other, he will off your policy. I wonder if his parents really want him driving there car or putting him on there insurance plan :shock:

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Aqx99 » Wed Nov 15, 2017 6:04 pm

Lee wrote:
Aqx99 wrote: . . . because I added a man he became the primary driver on the policy. . .


Sorry butt that is so sexist. Do you think he will honor what you ask? I sure hope so. Butt it's good to know one way or the other, he will off your policy. I wonder if his parents really want him driving there car or putting him on there insurance plan :shock:

Lee


I called him about it. He said he will as soon as he gives the rental car back. He plans on buying another vehicle, how I do not know and do not care. As long as he keeps up with paying me the money he owes me.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

Utwo
Posts: 285
Joined: Mon May 23, 2016 10:14 am
Location: T.O.

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Utwo » Fri Nov 17, 2017 12:58 pm

Aqx99 wrote:Apparently, even though the policy was mine originally, because I added a man he became the primary driver on the policy.

I do no believe that this can happen automatically.
Was he made a primary driver because of his better/longer driving history?

Who is a policyholder?
I believe that a policyholder can remove any driver who is on his/her policy.
58 yo male at diagnosis: T1bN0M0, 0/15 nodes, low grade/moderately differentiated adenocarcinoma
03/2016 colonoscopy: 2 small polyps removed in left colon; CEA = 1.3
04/2016 colonoscopy: caecum sessile 3.5 cm polyp piecemeal removed with kind of clear margins
05/2016 "prophylactic" laparoscopic right hemicolectomy - bleeding, leak, infection
06/2017 CT scan, colonoscopy OK; CEA = 1.6
A lot of funny stuff discovered by CT scans in liver, kidney, lungs, arteries, gallbladder, lymph node, pancreas

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Aqx99 » Fri Nov 17, 2017 1:55 pm

Utwo wrote:
Aqx99 wrote:Apparently, even though the policy was mine originally, because I added a man he became the primary driver on the policy.

I do no believe that this can happen automatically.
Was he made a primary driver because of his better/longer driving history?

Who is a policyholder?
I believe that a policyholder can remove any driver who is on his/her policy.


I was the original policyholder. I added him to my policy when we got married. I have the better driving record, he's had a ton of accidents and tickets. I've had none We probably both got our licenses around the same time because he got his at 19, I got mine at 16. He's 3 years older than me.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Aqx99 » Sat Nov 18, 2017 10:05 am

OK, now I'm borderline homicidal. He called me yesterday to ask about GAP coverage. I explained to him that you get it at the dealership when you finance the car. He asked me if we had it through our car insurance. Then it dawned on me, he added his new van to my policy instead of getting his own! I told him that I never agreed to let him do that and he was supposed to be getting his own policy and dropping off mine. He argued with me that his plan was to shop around for another policy in the next few days. I called my local agent and explained the situation. They called him back about the policy and how he was supposed to have gotten his own. Then he called me, screaming that he needed a credit card to get a new policy and he does not have one. I called the agent back and she explained that she had told him he could pay cash in the office or use a credit card over the phone, and that he was mistaken about being required to have a credit card to get the policy. She asked if I wanted her to call and clear it up with him and I said yes, because otherwise I would say some not nice things to him. She called me back after dealing with him to let me know that she had set him up on his own policy and that none of my already paid premium would go towards his new policy, which was another thing I wanted to make sure of. I paid that policy in August, he doesn't deserve to benefit from it. I'm just glad that she was so understanding of my situation and helped me handle it.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

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susie0915
Posts: 945
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2017 8:17 am
Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby susie0915 » Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:13 pm

So he is now off your policy? So glad you won't have to worry about this. He is probably paying a lot for that insurance with his history.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 PET scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 C 4mm lung nod
10/17 pel/abd CT NED
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, CT pel/abd/lung NED
11/18 CEA .6
5/19 CT NED, CEA <.5
10/19 Clear colonscopy
11/19 CEA <.5

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby Aqx99 » Sat Nov 18, 2017 3:29 pm

susie0915 wrote:So he is now off your policy? So glad you won't have to worry about this. He is probably paying a lot for that insurance with his history.


Yes, he is off my policy. The agent made sure of that. I'm sure his premium is out the roof, but frankly I don't care.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

MissMolly
Posts: 645
Joined: Wed Jun 03, 2015 4:33 pm
Location: Portland, Ore

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby MissMolly » Sat Nov 18, 2017 4:10 pm

“ You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.” - Bob Marley -

Ann:

Wow! And Double Wowza !

While the ongoing saga with your (separated) husband is unnerving and dramatic and difficult to read as an observer from afar, I am beyond impressed with your personal resolve and fortitude. You have been placed in several difficult binds with no easy answers, and yet you are consistently acting with level emotions and making decisions that are best for you. That takes gumption.

I am sorry that you are having to be “dragged through the mud,” so to speak. But a few weeks or months from now, you will reflect back on this time and think to yourself with pride “Wow, I did all of that? !”

Your relationship with your (separated) husband is not unlike surgery to remove a painful kidney stone. The pain from the kidney stone may be intense and the recovery difficult for a few days, but it is all worth it as you come to feel better with health restored. The dynamics with your husband may be discombobulating and challenging now, but soon you will feel a lifting of the weights and burdens that you have been unfairly carrying.

I wish you well, in all ways.
Karen
Dear friend to Bella Piazza, former Colon Club member (NWGirl).
I have a permanent ileostomy and offer advice on living with an ostomy - in loving remembrance of Bella
I am on Palliative Care for broad endocrine failure + Addison's disease + osteonecrosis of both hips/jaw + immunosuppression. I live a simple life due to frail health.

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susie0915
Posts: 945
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2017 8:17 am
Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: O/T Need to vent

Postby susie0915 » Sat Nov 18, 2017 4:22 pm

Aqx99 wrote:
susie0915 wrote:So he is now off your policy? So glad you won't have to worry about this. He is probably paying a lot for that insurance with his history.


Yes, he is off my policy. The agent made sure of that. I'm sure his premium is out the roof, but frankly I don't care.

And you shouldn't care. One less thing to cause you stress. You are handling everything so well.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 PET scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 C 4mm lung nod
10/17 pel/abd CT NED
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, CT pel/abd/lung NED
11/18 CEA .6
5/19 CT NED, CEA <.5
10/19 Clear colonscopy
11/19 CEA <.5


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