NEW-Need some positivity here.

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susie0915
Posts: 873
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Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby susie0915 » Thu Oct 26, 2017 7:14 am

Try not to focus on how much it sucks to have to be going through this. Focus on the fact that you are getting rid of this cancer. I agree with everyone here that the positive attitude is so important in getting through your treatment. You are going through chemo to get rid of any straggling cancer cells that may be lingering. Not to say it is easy, and there will bad days. I had some bad days during chemo, but I tried to keep a sense of humor through it all. Stay positive, you've already made it through so much.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 Pet scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 Bowel blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 Clear CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 CT 4mm lung nod
7/17 no change lung nod
10/17 Clear pel/abd CT
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, clear CT pel/abd/lung nod no change
11/18 CEA .6

NHMike
Posts: 1847
Joined: Fri Jul 21, 2017 3:43 am

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby NHMike » Thu Oct 26, 2017 10:01 am

Aqx99 wrote:
teacher2017 wrote:I have noticed that my health got better once I changed my attitude. It does go in waves. I can see how the phases of grief have to happen. I know I can get throw the chemo. I am determined and know I have no choice. So let's get on with it then!!!! Bring it on!


This is exactly the attitude you need going in to this. You have a marathon of treatment ahead of you. It takes a lot of strength to get through it. I started going downhill with all the crap my husband has laid on me, but since I started getting help for that I have improved again. Attitude really is everything with this. We're here to support you, keep us updated!


Attitude improves with good news. I felt a lot better after the second MRI results. I still have down times anticipating surgery but there are things that help with attitude.
6/17: ER rectal bleeding; Colonoscopy
7/17: 3B rectal. T3N1bM0. 5.2 4.5 4.3 cm. Lymphs: 6 x 4 mm, 8 x 6, 5 x 5
7/17-9/17: Xeloda radiation
7/5: CEA 2.7; 8/16: 1.9; 9/8: 1.8; 11/30: 0.6; 12/20 1.4; 1/10 1.8; 1/31 2.2; 2/28 2.6; 4/10 2.8; 5/1 2.8; 5/29 3.2; 7/13 4.5; 8/9 2.8
MSS, KRAS G12D
10/17: 2.7 2.2 1.6 cm (-90%). Lymphs: 3 x 3 mm (-62.5%), 4 x 3 (-75%), 5 x 3 (-40%). 5.1 CM from AV
10/17: LAR, Temp Ileostomy, Path Complete Response
CapeOx (8) 12/17-6/18
7/18: Reversal, Port Removal

DonutHead
Posts: 50
Joined: Tue Oct 03, 2017 6:45 pm
Facebook Username: mark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby DonutHead » Thu Oct 26, 2017 4:54 pm

Done with my first cycle of the OX and Xeloda....next cycle starts 01 November. 7 more to go! i feel good and am looking forward to the next cycle actually. It’s a new normal and at times i find myself forgetting about everything. Doctor says my counts are near normal and i appear to be doing good....for now. it’s early and i anticipate some challenging times, but i am all in! as i run during my chemo, i say out loud to myself....FIND IT, KILL IT! THIS WILL NOT BEAT ME, THIS WILL NOT KILL ME!

Time to enjoy my next several days off!

Mark
Male 49 yrs.
09/2017: Colonoscopy 2.2x2 cm lesion - Invasive Adenocarcinoma
- CT - slightly enlarged LN; CEA 2.0
- LAP Rectosigmoid - 8' and 25 LNs removed
- Biopsy - 1/25 LN slight molecular invasion
- Stage IIIa - T3 N1 M0
- Chemo: 3 of 8 rds Ox; 8 rds 4000mg Xeloda
10/2017: PET - NED
03/2018: PET/CT - NED
09/2018: PET/CT - NED
Still Here!

DonutHead
Posts: 50
Joined: Tue Oct 03, 2017 6:45 pm
Facebook Username: mark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby DonutHead » Sat Oct 28, 2017 7:51 am

Does anyone have any information on potential limited range of motion issues following a sigmoid resection? i am nearly nearly 6 weeks post op and feel a stretching feeling in my left side when normally stretching in the morning or twisting my trunk area. there is no pain, just a feeling as if that side is more limited in a stretching motion. i know to ask my surgeon and will, but wanted to ask if anyone had any experience with this. thanks!
Male 49 yrs.
09/2017: Colonoscopy 2.2x2 cm lesion - Invasive Adenocarcinoma
- CT - slightly enlarged LN; CEA 2.0
- LAP Rectosigmoid - 8' and 25 LNs removed
- Biopsy - 1/25 LN slight molecular invasion
- Stage IIIa - T3 N1 M0
- Chemo: 3 of 8 rds Ox; 8 rds 4000mg Xeloda
10/2017: PET - NED
03/2018: PET/CT - NED
09/2018: PET/CT - NED
Still Here!

teacher2017
Posts: 211
Joined: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:18 pm
Facebook Username: Lydia Clark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby teacher2017 » Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:57 am

So I tried some meditation this weekend and had a Reiki healing session. Not that I was ever into it before but it seemed to help clear negative thoughts and relax me. Still getting that port put in on Friday and chemo next Wed. What do you do to relax and de-stress?
48 year old female- mom of 2 (12,15)
DX stage 3c - 12/17 LN. T3
8" sigmoid resection Sept 22 2017
6.1cm tumor size
chemo -folfox 11/8/17-4/18
CEA level- 1.4 11/8/17
Colonoscopy- 5/30/18 - CLEAR!
Cea level- 1.8 6/1/18
Cea level- 2.1. 8/4/18
Sh$t has hit the fan- 8/10/18 Stage 4
1cm met in seg.8 liver
Liver resection- 9/12/18
Cea level- 1.5 10/1/18
Cea level- 1.2 12/1/18
Clear scan- 12/5/18

Pemba
Posts: 84
Joined: Thu Aug 24, 2017 7:52 am

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby Pemba » Mon Oct 30, 2017 9:04 am

If You fell the more spiritual things help you I can recommend yoga (if you have the energy) if you have a laptop or a iPad you can do a free online classes called yoga with Adrienne on YouTube. Some of the videos are 10 minutes other 30. She has some great anxiety yoga classes.

I can also recommend guided meditation, there are some different apps out there, and some of the guides have a focus on cancer but often without using the actual word.
Age: 26
2017: 15mm Tubulovillous adenoma- Low grade dysplasi.
Next scopy: original 2020 probably 2018-19

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susie0915
Posts: 873
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Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby susie0915 » Mon Oct 30, 2017 12:39 pm

The cancer center I went to has a spa. All cancer patients are eligible for $400 worth of services. They offer massage, yoga, acupuncture, facials, rekei, and some others. I didn't know of this benefit while doing chemo, I wish I would've. But I'm still eligible and going to use for acupuncture to see if it will help neuropathy. I did try to exercise during treatment which was helpful to make be feel better and make me feel like my life was somewhat normal. Anything you can do to help you relax.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 Pet scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 Bowel blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 Clear CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 CT 4mm lung nod
7/17 no change lung nod
10/17 Clear pel/abd CT
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, clear CT pel/abd/lung nod no change
11/18 CEA .6

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Shana
Posts: 401
Joined: Sun Jul 30, 2017 9:45 pm
Location: Sonoma, CA

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby Shana » Mon Oct 30, 2017 1:16 pm

teacher2017 wrote:So I tried some meditation this weekend and had a Reiki healing session. Not that I was ever into it before but it seemed to help clear negative thoughts and relax me. Still getting that port put in on Friday and chemo next Wed. What do you do to relax and de-stress?


I've been interested in trying meditation, yoga and really anything that might help me stay positive. I'm at chemo now, it's become routine, just another part of my life. I asked how long I have to be on this regimen. The oncologist I saw today was filling in for my regular onc, he's the head honcho of the practice and he told me very gently, "you have a chronic disease and it requires regular treatment to keep in in check." He also said that doesn't mean that I can't take a chemo holiday at some point but it definitely sounded like chemo for life which I pretty much figured... I know that I will need to develop more coping skills down the road. I'd like to try Reiki if you feel it was helpful to your psyche.

Wishing you all the best with port placement and for your upcoming chemo. What will they be treating you with?
DX - 12/16
MSS - KRAS wild
Well-differentiated adenocarcinoma at splenic flexure
Stage IV CC with liver mets
5FU - Failed twice - 1/17 and 3/17
Irinotecan + Cetuximab: 8/17
Irinotecan and Erbitux ran it's course. CEA rising
Primary tumor invaded tail of pancreas and spleen. Liver mets major concern
Y-90 radioembolization on 9/17/18, liver enzyymes have dropped. 10 Radiation treatments to primary tumor completed too. CT scan Nov to assess overall situation...

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susie0915
Posts: 873
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2017 8:17 am
Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby susie0915 » Mon Oct 30, 2017 1:52 pm

Shana wrote:
teacher2017 wrote:So I tried some meditation this weekend and had a Reiki healing session. Not that I was ever into it before but it seemed to help clear negative thoughts and relax me. Still getting that port put in on Friday and chemo next Wed. What do you do to relax and de-stress?


I've been interested in trying meditation, yoga and really anything that might help me stay positive. I'm at chemo now, it's become routine, just another part of my life. I asked how long I have to be on this regimen. The oncologist I saw today was filling in for my regular onc, he's the head honcho of the practice and he told me very gently, "you have a chronic disease and it requires regular treatment to keep in in check." He also said that doesn't mean that I can't take a chemo holiday at some point but it definitely sounded like chemo for life which I pretty much figured... I know that I will need to develop more coping skills down the road. I'd like to try Reiki if you feel it was helpful to your psyche.

Wishing you all the best with port placement and for your upcoming chemo. What will they be treating you with?

Maybe massage would be helpful Shana. I still get feelings of depression. Especially when I'm not busy. I need to learn to relax. I feel like I should be doing something all the time. I don't know if it's because since cancer I want to fit everything in possible, or just an feeling of restlessness. I met with a oncology counselor and she assured me these feelings are normal post treatment. Do you know when you may be able to take a break from chemo? It would probably be a welcome break for you. I think you have always been positive and so thoughtful on this forum. I'm sure you do have your down days though. I recommend you trying any of these if it can help you deal with all that you're going through. It can be distressing at times I'm sure.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 Pet scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 Bowel blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 Clear CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 CT 4mm lung nod
7/17 no change lung nod
10/17 Clear pel/abd CT
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, clear CT pel/abd/lung nod no change
11/18 CEA .6

teacher2017
Posts: 211
Joined: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:18 pm
Facebook Username: Lydia Clark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby teacher2017 » Mon Oct 30, 2017 6:02 pm

Shana wrote:
teacher2017 wrote:So I tried some meditation this weekend and had a Reiki healing session. Not that I was ever into it before but it seemed to help clear negative thoughts and relax me. Still getting that port put in on Friday and chemo next Wed. What do you do to relax and de-stress?


I've been interested in trying meditation, yoga and really anything that might help me stay positive. I'm at chemo now, it's become routine, just another part of my life. I asked how long I have to be on this regimen. The oncologist I saw today was filling in for my regular onc, he's the head honcho of the practice and he told me very gently, "you have a chronic disease and it requires regular treatment to keep in in check." He also said that doesn't mean that I can't take a chemo holiday at some point but it definitely sounded like chemo for life which I pretty much figured... I know that I will need to develop more coping skills down the road. I'd like to try Reiki if you feel it was helpful to your psyche.

Wishing you all the best with port placement and for your upcoming chemo. What will they be treating you with?


Oh you know, the folfox cocktail!
48 year old female- mom of 2 (12,15)
DX stage 3c - 12/17 LN. T3
8" sigmoid resection Sept 22 2017
6.1cm tumor size
chemo -folfox 11/8/17-4/18
CEA level- 1.4 11/8/17
Colonoscopy- 5/30/18 - CLEAR!
Cea level- 1.8 6/1/18
Cea level- 2.1. 8/4/18
Sh$t has hit the fan- 8/10/18 Stage 4
1cm met in seg.8 liver
Liver resection- 9/12/18
Cea level- 1.5 10/1/18
Cea level- 1.2 12/1/18
Clear scan- 12/5/18

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Shana
Posts: 401
Joined: Sun Jul 30, 2017 9:45 pm
Location: Sonoma, CA

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby Shana » Mon Oct 30, 2017 6:12 pm

susie0915 wrote:
Shana wrote:
teacher2017 wrote:So I tried some meditation this weekend and had a Reiki healing session. Not that I was ever into it before but it seemed to help clear negative thoughts and relax me. Still getting that port put in on Friday and chemo next Wed. What do you do to relax and de-stress?


I've been interested in trying meditation, yoga and really anything that might help me stay positive. I'm at chemo now, it's become routine, just another part of my life. I asked how long I have to be on this regimen. The oncologist I saw today was filling in for my regular onc, he's the head honcho of the practice and he told me very gently, "you have a chronic disease and it requires regular treatment to keep in in check." He also said that doesn't mean that I can't take a chemo holiday at some point but it definitely sounded like chemo for life which I pretty much figured... I know that I will need to develop more coping skills down the road. I'd like to try Reiki if you feel it was helpful to your psyche.

Wishing you all the best with port placement and for your upcoming chemo. What will they be treating you with?


Maybe massage would be helpful Shana. I still get feelings of depression. Especially when I'm not busy. I need to learn to relax. I feel like I should be doing something all the time. I don't know if it's because since cancer I want to fit everything in possible, or just an feeling of restlessness. I met with a oncology counselor and she assured me these feelings are normal post treatment. Do you know when you may be able to take a break from chemo? It would probably be a welcome break for you. I think you have always been positive and so thoughtful on this forum. I'm sure you do have your down days though. I recommend you trying any of these if it can help you deal with all that you're going through. It can be distressing at times I'm sure.


Susie,

Massage sounds wonderful! Things are going well on my current chemo so I'm trying to do the things that I used to enjoy doing before CRC. I used to work full time so I have too much time on my hands now that I am feeling relatively "normal". I am even going to a Halloween party with friends tomorrow. I think I do feel the need to live as fully as possible since diagnosis. I have my down times for sure but I kind of smack myself and remember how much I've already gone through and survived. I have no chemo break date yet, might not be for awhile but hoping that my December scan shows more improvement which will eventually allow a break without losing ground. I psychologically feel safer when I'm on chemo, I don't need a therapist to explain why either! I'd be happy with even a 2 week break over the holidays so I can enjoy them this year, we didn't even get a tree last year because I just didn't care.

Thanks for your suggestion and sharing your own feelings, it's so helpful knowing that I'm not the only one with this restless feeling. I would drink some wine but I've been pretty much abstaining since my diagnosis. What I really want is a Mai Tai with a little paper umbrella... oh and to be sitting on the beach while I sip on it :lol:
DX - 12/16
MSS - KRAS wild
Well-differentiated adenocarcinoma at splenic flexure
Stage IV CC with liver mets
5FU - Failed twice - 1/17 and 3/17
Irinotecan + Cetuximab: 8/17
Irinotecan and Erbitux ran it's course. CEA rising
Primary tumor invaded tail of pancreas and spleen. Liver mets major concern
Y-90 radioembolization on 9/17/18, liver enzyymes have dropped. 10 Radiation treatments to primary tumor completed too. CT scan Nov to assess overall situation...

teacher2017
Posts: 211
Joined: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:18 pm
Facebook Username: Lydia Clark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby teacher2017 » Tue Oct 31, 2017 7:57 pm

Speaking of wine and Mai tais, I'm not much of a drinker. But since this diagnosis, I have wanted to get rip roaring drunk. I could really use it. Been wondering if my colon can stand it. But one of these days I'm gonna line up some shots. F Cancer. How many of you reacted like this? Did you scream out the window? Drive around for hours? Or am I the only one?
48 year old female- mom of 2 (12,15)
DX stage 3c - 12/17 LN. T3
8" sigmoid resection Sept 22 2017
6.1cm tumor size
chemo -folfox 11/8/17-4/18
CEA level- 1.4 11/8/17
Colonoscopy- 5/30/18 - CLEAR!
Cea level- 1.8 6/1/18
Cea level- 2.1. 8/4/18
Sh$t has hit the fan- 8/10/18 Stage 4
1cm met in seg.8 liver
Liver resection- 9/12/18
Cea level- 1.5 10/1/18
Cea level- 1.2 12/1/18
Clear scan- 12/5/18

User avatar
susie0915
Posts: 873
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2017 8:17 am
Facebook Username: Susan DeGrazia Hostetter
Location: Michigan

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby susie0915 » Wed Nov 01, 2017 7:23 am

I'm not a huge drinker either. I do partake now and then though. Screaming out the window is okay, it's a good release. Driving around is also therapeutic. I don't know if you have been put in contact with an oncology counselor, but that may help as well. I know it's been mentioned to you before. It was helpful for me as the counselor assured me that all my feelings were quite common and normal. I still have moments that I get angry about my dx and what the treatments have done to my body. But for the most part, I'm doing okay and as time goes by my life is becoming more normal. Just a new normal. Once you start chemo, you will be focused on that, knowing you are killing any cancer that may remain in your body. This lull between your surgery and chemo has gives you nothing to do but think, and our mind can go so many places. The busier we are the better. I don't work so that gave me a lot of free time to ponder. I have been thinking of volunteering, as I need to get busier. I'm sure when you are at work it is easier.
58 yrs old Dx @ 55
5/15 DX T3N0MO
6/15 5 wks chemo/rad
7/15 sigmoidoscopy/only scar tissue left
8/15 Pet scan NED
9/15 LAR
0/24 nodes
10/15 Bowel blockage. surgery,early ileo rev, c-diff inf :(
12/15 6 rds of xelox
5/16 Clear CT lung scarring/inflammation
9/16 clear colonoscopy
4/17 CT 4mm lung nod
7/17 no change lung nod
10/17 Clear pel/abd CT
11/17 CEA<.5
1/18 CT/Lung no change in 4mm nodule
5/18 CEA<.5, clear CT pel/abd/lung nod no change
11/18 CEA .6

teacher2017
Posts: 211
Joined: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:18 pm
Facebook Username: Lydia Clark

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby teacher2017 » Wed Nov 01, 2017 2:45 pm

susie0915 wrote:I'm not a huge drinker either. I do partake now and then though. Screaming out the window is okay, it's a good release. Driving around is also therapeutic. I don't know if you have been put in contact with an oncology counselor, but that may help as well. I know it's been mentioned to you before. It was helpful for me as the counselor assured me that all my feelings were quite common and normal. I still have moments that I get angry about my dx and what the treatments have done to my body. But for the most part, I'm doing okay and as time goes by my life is becoming more normal. Just a new normal. Once you start chemo, you will be focused on that, knowing you are killing any cancer that may remain in your body. This lull between your surgery and chemo has gives you nothing to do but think, and our mind can go so many places. The busier we are the better. I don't work so that gave me a lot of free time to ponder. I have been thinking of volunteering, as I need to get busier. I'm sure when you are at work it is easier.


I agree the busier I am the better. And the break between surgery and chemo is long. Makes me feel unproductive. The nightmares are not so vivid but still made an appt to see a counselor. The dark thoughts are still there. I just horpe they aren't in the front of my mind one day.
48 year old female- mom of 2 (12,15)
DX stage 3c - 12/17 LN. T3
8" sigmoid resection Sept 22 2017
6.1cm tumor size
chemo -folfox 11/8/17-4/18
CEA level- 1.4 11/8/17
Colonoscopy- 5/30/18 - CLEAR!
Cea level- 1.8 6/1/18
Cea level- 2.1. 8/4/18
Sh$t has hit the fan- 8/10/18 Stage 4
1cm met in seg.8 liver
Liver resection- 9/12/18
Cea level- 1.5 10/1/18
Cea level- 1.2 12/1/18
Clear scan- 12/5/18

Aqx99
Posts: 403
Joined: Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:28 am
Facebook Username: aqx99
Location: Pfafftown, NC

Re: NEW-Need some positivity here.

Postby Aqx99 » Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:45 pm

teacher2017 wrote:I agree the busier I am the better. And the break between surgery and chemo is long. Makes me feel unproductive. The nightmares are not so vivid but still made an appt to see a counselor. The dark thoughts are still there. I just horpe they aren't in the front of my mind one day.


I'm glad you are seeing a counselor. Mine has helped me immensely. Don't be put off by the idea of medication, either. My counselor referred me to a psychiatric nurse practitioner because she felt medication would help me. He prescribed me something to help me sleep, as well as a mild antidepressant. I've been taking both for a few weeks and I feel they are helping. He even mentioned that he noticed a change in me when I saw him last week.
Anne, 40
Stage IIIB Rectal Cancer
T3N1bM0
2/21/17 Dx, Age 39
2/21/17 CEA 0.9
3/23/17 - 5/2/17 Chemoradiation, 28 treatments
6/14/17 Robotic LAR w/temp loop ileostomy, ovaries & fallopian tubes removed, 2/21 lymph nodes positive
7/24/17 - 12/18/17 CapeOx, 6 Cycles
7/24/17 Dx w/ovarian cancer
9/6/17 CA 125 11.1
11/27/17 CEA 2.6
12/5/17 CT NED
12/13/17 CEA 2.9
1/11/18 CA 125 8.6
1/23/18 Reversal
3/21/18 CT enlarged thymus
4/6/18 PET NED
7/10/18 CT NED
7/11/18 CEA 2.6
9/18 Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy


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