I am doing OK. I pop in for a few mins here and there from time to time, but I find my heart often isn't in it much, as its painful to be reminded of the situation I had gone thru, and the very rapid decline of my wife 3 months ago. I feel the medical establishment really let us down. My head really isn't much into anything including continued research at this point. Trying to honor her memory with the dogs, but work makes it difficult to keep up their training. Still in the process of getting affairs in order. Every time I thing I am ahead I find other stuff I need to take care of. Since before we ever got married she took care of everything having to do with vehicle purchases, mortgages, everything financial, so I really had no clue! I found out yesterday that I could lose the truck I am still paying on because I was not a co signer on that particular loan. I will have to get a new loan in my name (probably with worse interest rate now) if I want to keep the truck! A time consuming PITA! Have had issues with our horse, as he has been throwing shoes left and right the last couple of months! It aint cheap to have them reset. I don't like the farrier much they use at the barn, and my Wife's preferred farrier lately has been very unreliable in terms of showing up. I can't afford to take time off waiting for a no show. Also - all the work around the property that the two of us use to do, is now done only by me, and its slipping.
So - I am doing OK. Not great.
DW 53 dx Jun 2013
CT mets Liver Spleen lung. IVb CEA~110
Jul 2013 Sig Resct
8/13 FolFox,Avastin 12Tx mild sfx, Ongoing 5-FU Avastin every 3 wks.
CEA: good marker
7/7/14 CT Can't see the spleen Mets.
8/16/15 CEA Up, CT new abdominal mets. Iri, 5-FU, Avastin every 2 wks.
1/16 Iri, Erbitux and likely Avastin (Trial) CEA going >.
1/17 CEA up again dropped from Trial, Mets growth 4-6 mm in abdomen
5/2/17 Failed second trial, Hospitalized 15 days 5/11. Home Hospice 5/26, at peace 6/4/2017