Anxiety for Caregiver

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ashima2016
Posts: 36
Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2016 10:56 am

Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby ashima2016 » Tue Aug 15, 2017 12:39 pm

Waiting for my hubby's colonoscopy to be done. My anxiety has been increasing after chemo completed, and can be overwhelming from time to time, the CT, MRI, blood work, and the colonoscopy.

I am a stress eater, and I've ate too much candies lately - not good. Very few family and friends know what we've been through in the past 10 mths.

Dear board members, how do you cope with the anxiety? Especially as the caregiver?

Basil
Posts: 275
Joined: Thu Mar 16, 2017 12:33 pm

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby Basil » Tue Aug 15, 2017 2:46 pm

Xanax
40 y/o male (now 46), kids 11 & 14.
Dx 3/16/17, rectal cancer s3,t3,n1,m0
PROSPCT trial (FOLFOX in lieu of chemorad)
FOLFOX 4/5/17 - 6/26/17
LAR 7/31/17, temp ileo
pathological complete response
Adjuvant chemo cancelled (IDEA Study)
Ileo reversed 9/25/17
NED
1 year scans - clear
2 year scans - clear
3 year scans - clear
4 year scans - clear
5 year scans - clear (considered cured)

JudeD59
Posts: 726
Joined: Sun Apr 12, 2015 12:16 pm

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby JudeD59 » Tue Aug 15, 2017 3:55 pm

Can you ask your doctor for a prescription for Ativan? I find it to be very gentle and help a lot. It doesn't make me woozy or feel drugged at all.

Some people find relief from stress through exercise. I know it's probably hard for you to find a spare minute for yourself, but if you can take a brisk walk or do some yoga or something, that might help a little.

Personally, I would try both the pills and the exercise. I'm a patient, not a caregiver, but Ativan and walking both helped me and still do.

Good luck!

Judy
56 yrs old, wife, mother to 4 daughters
RC Stage II T3N0M0 DX April 2, 2015
6 cm. mid-rectum-CEA 121
Xeloda and radiation finished 06/15/15- CEA 242
CEA right before surgery 81
LAR performed 8/12/15 Temporary ileostomy
CEA 10-21-15 1.6
PET scan 11-4-15 All clear
Port installed 11/11/15
Folfox started 11/18/15
Folfox stopped due to bad reaction
Reversal 2/17/16
CEA 2/3/16 1.7
CEA 3/31/16 1.3
CT Scan 4/12/16 All Clear
Port removed 4/21/16
CEA 5/24/17 1.4

User avatar
ocstacy
Posts: 264
Joined: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:29 pm
Facebook Username: stacy

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby ocstacy » Tue Aug 15, 2017 10:36 pm

Dear board members, how do you cope with the anxiety? Especially as the caregiver?


I have joined a boot camp class and I love it! I love to run and compete on my fit bit. I was addicted to meds back in the day.. you name it.. xanax, vicodin, ambien.. i was a pill popper. I do not go to drug cause of it's habit forming addiction. My mother's dr. purposely does not prescribe ativan to younger people because of the addictions.

Many starts have over dosed on Ativan but they mix with alcohol and other drugs. Just be safe. My mom takes 1/2 Ativan for sleep and it's prescribed by her general dr. He said that with my mom's age, it's okay for her to take them.
Caregiver/daughter to dear mother age 78, dx 5/09/17 because of me!! :wink:
Rectal CA Stage 3 low-grade adenocarcinoma- 6 cm
Neoadjuvant start 7/10/17 ended 08/16/17
3D Lap. surgery @ Keck USC, Dr. Sang Lee 10/17/17 temp ileostomy
11/1 hospitalized abscess/hernia - home 11/06/17 antibiotics
NO LYMPHS INVOLVED! NEAR PATHOLOGICAL RESPONSE! YAY! :shock:
Took her last chemo med 05/10/18! Ileo reversal 07/24/18
1st BM after reversal 07/25/18 Anal Fissure 8/15/18
Me:1st Colonoscopy age 38. 08/17 Benign polp.

tater
Posts: 133
Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2017 5:53 pm

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby tater » Wed Aug 16, 2017 12:41 am

When you figure it out let me know, because this taking care of my wife and young family has been a test of faith to say the least. I've almost wondered if I need to go get some anti depressants.
DH to 38 wife w/kids
Stage 3C DX 3/3/17 CEA 29
5-fu and radiation ended May 17, 2017
Stage 4 External iliac node July 17, 2017
FOLFOX + Avistan July 18 2017 CEA 2.3
Nov 9, 2017 Coloanal Anastomosis, Hysterectomy & External Nodes Removed W/ileostomy
Clear Margins NED
CEA 1.5 12/17, 2.1 2/18, 2.3 6/18, 1.1 9/18, 1.3 12/18, 1.8 3/19, 2.5 6/19
Clear CT and MRI on 2/5/2018, 9/18 Clear Scans
Reversal Surgery 6/26/18
Small Spot on right ureter surgery 10/30/19 adhered to artery
Dec. 2 start 12 rounds FOLFIRI

Beckster
Posts: 438
Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2017 3:01 pm
Location: New Jersey

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby Beckster » Wed Aug 16, 2017 6:39 am

ashima2016 wrote:Waiting for my hubby's colonoscopy to be done. My anxiety has been increasing after chemo completed, and can be overwhelming from time to time, the CT, MRI, blood work, and the colonoscopy.

I am a stress eater, and I've ate too much candies lately - not good. Very few family and friends know what we've been through in the past 10 mths.

Dear board members, how do you cope with the anxiety? Especially as the caregiver?



As you know, we are going through the same thing...know you are not alone in this journey. Just a suggestion.... There are support groups for survivors and caretakers. As part of the MD Anderson multi disciplinary team, you were afforded a nurse navigator, dietician, and social worker. Reach out to the nurse navigator or social worker. There a groups you can join, plus it might give you access to other programs as part of MD Anderson.

Becky
57/F
DX:(CC) 10/19/16
11/4/16- Lap right hemi(cecum)
CEA- Pre Op (1.9), Pre Chemo (2.5)
Type: Adenocarcinoma
Tumor size:3.5 cm x 2.5 x 0.7 cm
Grade: G3
TNM: T3N0M0/IIA
LN: 0/24
LVI present
Surgical margins: clear
MSS
12/27/2016 - Capeox, anaphylactic
1/2/17 to 6/9/17- Xeloda
6/17,12/17,6/18,12/18,6/19,12/19,12/20,12/21 CT Scan NED :D
CEA- 6/17- 3.6, 9/17- 2.8 12/17-2.8, 3/18-3.1, 6/18-3.0, 9/18 2.8, 12/18 2.5 3/19 3.1 6/19 3.1 9/19 2.6 12/19 2.8 6/20 3.0 12/20 2.7 6/21 2.9,[color=#000000]12/21 2.7[/color]
Clear Colonoscopy 10/17, 11/19,11/21 :D

Deb m
Posts: 558
Joined: Tue Jan 14, 2014 10:08 am

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby Deb m » Wed Aug 16, 2017 7:43 am

Your not alone there. My husband is almost 7 years out now and has been NED and the anxiety has gotten a little better, but still every time he gets a backache, stomach pain or anything I just freak out still. The anxiety the first few years was uncontrollable. There were days I didn't really think I was going to make it thru. My husband, when he was undergoing chemo was unable to work because he's a pilot by profession and he was grounded by the FAA till he completed all treatment. I also had the stress of financial matters because he was the main bread maker. I at the time was also trying to do what was best for our two sons who were 11&12 years old at the time. I tried many things, but being a very religious person, the only thing the calmed my was prayer. Know that I continue to pray for everybody on the board both patients and caregivers!

Wishing you the best,

Debm

Rainykatie
Posts: 35
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2017 2:58 pm

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby Rainykatie » Wed Aug 16, 2017 11:12 am

Hi there, you are not alone. Since my mom's diagnosis in April and me becoming her primary caregiver (she moved in with me), I have experienced a lot of anxiety. I had my first ever anxiety attack early on. I am the breadwinner in my family and I have two small children (2 and 4 years old) to care for.

I have struggled with my weight for a long time but had been on a good trajectory of weight loss. Since April though, I have gained over 15 pounds which is depressing as I was already very overweight. I am also a stress eater. I stopped exercising. My hair has begun to turn gray.

I feel like nobody is really focused on me or my health right now, the concern is all on my mom (which is probably should be), but my self care is faltering and my health is suffering.

So recently, I started sort of being able to pull myself together. I haven't had an anxiety attack in a while. I started exercising every day, no matter what I get at least 30 minutes of cardiovascular exercise. That is the deal I made with myself. I either jog or swim, or use the elliptical at the gym. It works- I feel A LOT better. I also start every day (if the kids allow it) with a quick 20 minutes of morning yoga. Taking the time to breath and stretch does wonders.

Being a caregiver is super hard, and heart wrenching, and agonizing, and anxiety-inducing. My social life is now non-existent, we can't really have our friends over anymore and we can't really go anywhere to leave town. Lately I've been trying super hard to plan little outings for our family and even a vacation next winter, to give us something to look forward to.

I'm sorry you are going through this too! We are in this together. Hugs.
Caregiver to my mom (73)
Dx Stage IV w/ liver, bone mets 4/14/17
Folfox started 4/25/17 - 8 rounds
Took a 6 week break to check some things off the bucket list - great response from chemo - everything shrunk and liver tumors virtually gone
CT scan 9/2017 showed spread to ovaries- laparoscopic surgery at MSK
Resumed Folfox 10/23/17 - 1 round
Surgery to remove primary tumor due to discomfort, 11/7/17. Trouble with recovery, numerous mets to abdomen area found
Passed 12/5/17

ashima2016
Posts: 36
Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2016 10:56 am

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby ashima2016 » Wed Aug 16, 2017 11:39 am

Sitting here, I have tears in my eyes reading your responses. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and your kind words. Hugs to each of you.

ashima2016
Posts: 36
Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2016 10:56 am

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby ashima2016 » Wed Aug 16, 2017 11:53 am

Rainykatie wrote:Hi there, you are not alone.


Rainykatie, thanks for sharing. Reading yours, I felt I was reading my own post. I gained 9 pounds since Jan, I grew so much grey hair now I seriously consider dying my hair (have small kids, and don't want other kids to ask, is that your grandma?), I have been postponing my annual exam for 6 months, waiting for the completion of the chemo, the first CT, the first colonoscopy, I couldn't focus at work, I also find frustrating that we won't be able to go away (really away away) for vacation.

I've been trying really hard to "rebalance" my life lately. According to the "oxygen mask" theory, we, caregivers, really need to take care of ourselves first. Little things like cutting down the candies, taking a walk during lunch time, all help. I also found so many hidden jewels in local area! Within 10 mins drive from where we live, I found several trails. Within 30 mins drive, there are several small parks we've never visited. I realize the disease really changed my perspective of life, little things like a pretty trail can make me happy now. Since I can't turn back the clock and change the fact that DH has the disease, I will have to look forward.

Thanks again for sharing. Best wishes to you and your family.

Lovenothate
Posts: 38
Joined: Tue Aug 16, 2016 3:13 am
Facebook Username: Emily.guzman

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby Lovenothate » Wed Aug 16, 2017 3:44 pm

I
ashima2016 wrote:
Dear board members, how do you cope with the anxiety? Especially as the caregiver?


I know it's probably not a good idea to do this... but I plan. My anxiety stems from the fact that we are not near a big cancer center and my mom is a single mother who was barely able to send me off to college. So I have locations and am now saving up money in case anything happens. But other types of planning such as meal prepping and activities real help.
... a small dose of Ativan... shouldn't be overlooked either.

Em
daughter to DM dx Stage IV CRC @47 July 2016
total hysterectomy b/c ovarian mets abscites 6/16
Colostomy
Folfox 7/16
Lung spots 2mm each 9/16
Xeloda & Avastin 1/17
Shrinkage to lungs spots! 4/17
Break from Avastin/ Xeloda continued 7/17
Omentum mets/ lungs mets stable(possibly not malignant)
Folfiri 8/17
1 lung spot all along-clear abdomen scans chemo break until 4/4/17

tater
Posts: 133
Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2017 5:53 pm

Re: Anxiety for Caregiver

Postby tater » Wed Aug 16, 2017 7:16 pm

One thing I did today was to give blood. My wife has a lot of surgery planned and I thought this is a small way to help even though my blood won't go to her I feel like I did what I could.
DH to 38 wife w/kids
Stage 3C DX 3/3/17 CEA 29
5-fu and radiation ended May 17, 2017
Stage 4 External iliac node July 17, 2017
FOLFOX + Avistan July 18 2017 CEA 2.3
Nov 9, 2017 Coloanal Anastomosis, Hysterectomy & External Nodes Removed W/ileostomy
Clear Margins NED
CEA 1.5 12/17, 2.1 2/18, 2.3 6/18, 1.1 9/18, 1.3 12/18, 1.8 3/19, 2.5 6/19
Clear CT and MRI on 2/5/2018, 9/18 Clear Scans
Reversal Surgery 6/26/18
Small Spot on right ureter surgery 10/30/19 adhered to artery
Dec. 2 start 12 rounds FOLFIRI


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