Beansmama Checking in

Please feel free to read, share your thoughts, your stories and connect with others!
User avatar
Posts: 959
Joined: Thu Jan 28, 2016 1:38 am
Location: North Carolina

Beansmama Checking in

Postby BeansMama » Wed Jun 14, 2017 2:55 pm

HI everyone,

Sorry I have been so absent. Quite honestly my life has kind of gone to hell in a handbasket the last few months. Well except on the CRC front, that is about the only thing that has been going positively.

It started mid February when I found out that my husband, who up until then I had thought was amazing (talk about having my head in the sand, totally missed the signs until it was too late) was having an affair, and had been for quite a few months. While I was going through all the chemo treatments, sicker than a dog, he turned to someone else. It began as an emotional affair then crossed the line.

To say I have been a bit of a wreck is putting it mildly. I have come to terms with it, and now with a pending divorce. We are living as room mates until I am healthy enough to do everything on my own. He knows he will be paying dearly for his choices, normally I am not that type of person but this time I am going to go for all I can. I need to think of kiddos security before my pride which would have me not take a red cent from him. We have not gone public with the divorce yet, which made things a bit more difficult for me. I had very few people I could talk to about it.

But, on to the good news, my oncologist told me yesterday that the treatment I got may be my last. I have a CT scan on the 26th, and see the surgeon again on the 27th. If she finally gives the go ahead for surgery he said Larry could be served his eviction notice as soon as the first week in July. He seems to think that now is the time to go in, I have gotten about everything I can get from the Keytruda. Thankfully the wait time is minimal unlike chemo, the surgeon said I only need 2 weeks after a treatment and they can operate. That time frame will be up when I see her next so I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

I have been doing really well, I have started driving again thanks to the ritalin they put me on to combat the fatigue. It also counteracts a lot of the effects of the pain medication so I am able to do a lot more than before. I started just going to the local coffee shop during the day to get out of the house. Now I go to most of my appointments on my own, go shopping etc. Have some plans for the summer with the bean, hopefully surgery doesn't impact them too much.

I hope everyone is doing well, I am still keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers.
41 yrs old
Tumor found 9/2015
Surgery 1 - 11/2015 LAR and colostomy
Surgery 2 - 11/2015 wound vac
Surgery 3 - 12/2015 revise resection, move colostomy
Mets to liver - tumor inoperable - one add'l met destroyed
Stage IVa (T3 N2a M1a)
Primary tumor 9 cm x 7.5 cm x 2 cm
Beginning Folfox 1/2016 - Failed
Beginning Folfiri and vectibix 8/2016 — Failed
Beginning Folfirinox + Avastin 11/2016 - Failed
Beginning Keytruda 1/2017
CEA drop from 345 to 7.3 after starting immunotherapy
Lynch positive 3/2016

User avatar
Posts: 10285
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby CRguy » Wed Jun 14, 2017 3:28 pm

" It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, ... " - Charles Dickens
Good news on the treatment front, very happy for you my friend.

Not so happy on the other front and very sorry for your new challenges ...
"Well wouldn't you just know my uncle always used to say...if it isn't one thing then it's another.." - Roseanne Rosannadanna

Sometimes life just sucks shit !

We are here for you, and with you homie

Sending all my best wishes your way
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
14 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far

User avatar
Posts: 651
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2016 12:49 am
Location: Europe

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby LPL » Wed Jun 14, 2017 4:19 pm

Dear BeansMama,
I have been thinking very much about you !!
What a ... sad personal family 'thing' that has happened to you !!! No wonder you have been absent :!: My guess is that your husband will suffer for making this life changing desition - and at this time in your life?! To be a caregiver is not easy all the time but ... No, I do not get it.
I wish there was something that I/we here on Colonclub could do to help with that. When it happened to me (100 years ago and no kids) I drank half a bottle of whisky :cry: - No it did not help.
You sound very strong :) and driving again must feel so good! The words from your oncologist :) and the talk about surgery :) is like lovely music to all but Larry :mrgreen: The very best of Luck for the upcoming scan.
Sending a lot of warm hugs to you.
Kind regards /L
DH @ 65 DX 4/11/16 CC recto-sigmoid junction
Adenocarcenoma 35x15x9mm G3(biopsi) G1(surgical)
Mets 3 Liver resectable
T4aN1bM1a IVa 2/9 LN
MSS, KRAS-mut G13D
CEA & CA19-9: 5/18 2.5 78 8/17 1.4 48 2/14/17 1.8 29
4 Folfox 6/15-7/30 (b4 liver surgery) 8 after
CT: 8/8 no change 3/27/17 NED->Jan-19 mets to lung NED again Oct-19 :)
:!: Steroid induced hyperglycemia dx after 3chemo
Surgeries 2016: 3/18 Emergency colostomy
5/23 Primary+gallbl+stoma reversal+port 9/1 Liver mets
RFA 2019: Feb & Oct lung mets

Posts: 1461
Joined: Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:46 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby stu » Wed Jun 14, 2017 5:15 pm

Firstly I am delighted your doing well with your treatment. We so longed for that .
You sound strong despite your circumstances. I have no doubt you will come through but I am sad you have been disappointed.
Much love to you ,
supporter to my mum who lives a great life despite a difficult diagnosis
stage4 2009 significant spread to liver
2010 colon /liver resection
chemo following recurrence
73% of liver removed
enjoying life treatment free
2016 lung resection
Oct 2017 nice clear scan . Two lung nodules disappeared
Oct 2018. Another clear scan .

Posts: 817
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:33 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby jhocno197 » Wed Jun 14, 2017 6:23 pm

I am so happy treatment is going so wonderfully.

I am so very sorry about everything else. :(
DH - dx Dec 2014, stage IV with bladder & peritoneal involvement - non-resectable
FOLFOX failed
FOLFIRI failed
Tumor actually distending pelvic skin
Not a candidate for last-ditch pelvic exenteration
Stivarga finally begun 2/19/16
Tumor growing/fungating
Lonsurf started 11/18/16
Died 3/10/17

User avatar
Posts: 86
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2016 4:25 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby SEWHAPPY » Wed Jun 14, 2017 6:42 pm

Cheers for the good news about Larry. Hugs for the personal trials. Prayers for courage.
Female age 51.
CC diagnosed 10/13/16 at first colonoscopy.
Lap colon resection 11/21/16, removed ovary & fallopian tube.
T4N0M0, stage IIC.
Lynch negative.
Power port installed 12/19/16.
12 rounds FOLFOX done 6/16/17.

Posts: 249
Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2016 3:31 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby TXLiz » Wed Jun 14, 2017 8:36 pm

So sorry. Really super sorry about what you have been going through.

Praying for you and hope surgery goes well.

You are so strong. I hope things get better for you.
Vomiting and blockage 9/19/16 46 y F
R hemi colectomy 9/20/16
Stage 3 B CRC, located in cecum
3 out of 16 lymph nodes positive
perineural invasion/lymphovascular invasion
infiltrating, mod differentiated adenocarcinoma with a mucinous component
separate tumor nodules present in pericolonic adipose tissue
Baseline PET scan clear 9/16 CEA 0.5
FOLFOX 10/16- 3/17
April 16th, CT scan clear. CEA 1.1
Lynch "inconclusive"
Colonoscopy 10/5/2017 clear

User avatar
Posts: 513
Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2016 3:48 pm
Location: Central NY

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby WriterGirl1969 » Wed Jun 14, 2017 9:14 pm

When I first joined this group, it was something that you said that changed my perspective and gave me the point of view that has kept me going ever since. As I watched you on your journey, I think that I - like many others here - hoped and prayed for you to get some good news and find some relief to all you were enduring. When I found out about this new challenge you were forced to face... I was angry. Angry for you and that you had to go through MORE than you had already been through. But just like before, you have changed my perspective. I see your strength and determination in the face of yet another challenge, and I find my admiration for you has increased so much.

Some people complain when they get stuck in traffic. Some (myself included) feel sorry for themselves when something goes wrong. Then someone like you comes along and shows us all what we are capable of facing. What we are capable of enduring.

You are my hero.

Hugs and prayers from me,
DX 3/4/2016 Colon Cancer; age 46 Mom of then 4-yr-old
Stage IIIB: T3N1M0
3/31/16 Surgery
4 to 10/2016: Xeloda Monotherapy
CEA: 10/16 0.56, 1/17 0.54
CT CLEAR: 3/6/17; 4/17/18; 4/16/19
NED 3 years
“If I can help somebody as I walk along, then my living shall not be in vain.”

User avatar
Rob in PA
Posts: 2005
Joined: Wed Dec 09, 2009 9:16 pm
Location: Pennsylvania

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby Rob in PA » Wed Jun 14, 2017 10:54 pm

BeansMama, I predict good things for you in future....stay strong and get through this mini storm. What an ass he was.

Best to you
dx 11/07 crc IIIb @ 39
Xelox/Rad/ temp colostomy
LAR/J-pouch/ temp ileo
Failed reversal
2/09 liver mets; liver resect/ileo reversal
Folfiri/Avastin - 12
2/11 5 lung mets
Folfiri/Avastin 2011
SBRT 3/12
Lung met 5/13/ said NO to more chemo
SBRT 8/13
2 lung mets 5/14, VATS 8/14, NED

Posts: 98
Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2016 6:16 am
Location: Hong Kong

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby LMighty » Wed Jun 14, 2017 11:12 pm


Really sorry to hear the situation you are going through but delighted to know treatment goes well. Your strength is inspiring and I hope things get better and better for you!
Supporter to my mom (64 yr); KRAS wild type; MSS

2012: DX Stage I, rectal cancer; resection and colostomy
5/16: DX Stage III, mets found; right groin lymph node and soft tissue
5-6/16: Radiation + Xeloda
7/16: DX Stage IV, pleural effusion; cancer cells found in fluid
7-12/16: Xelox + Avastin X 6
1/17: Clean PET scan, NED
2/17: Pleural effusion; recurrence
4/17: Iri + Erb X 3
5/17: Ascites; Chemo failed
6/17: Keytruda X 1
7/17: TECENTRIQ (atezolizumab) + COTELLIC (cobimetinib)
9/17: At peace

Posts: 241
Joined: Wed Sep 09, 2015 3:31 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby AnnClare » Thu Jun 15, 2017 7:46 am


Oh, my dear. My heart goes out to you! I echo Tracy (WriterGirl's) sentiments.

I am THRILLED for your good news on the CRC front, yet I am angry for the turn your personal life has taken.
You are strong. A warrior. A champion. An ass-kicker! I cannot begin to fathom how you feel, but you WILL get through this latest challenge, and you will continue to thrive! Your spirit and fortitude are immeasurable.

While we here are not a replacement for friends and family, you know you can always come here to vent, yell, curse, scream, cry, all you want. We are here for you, my friend. Be it on the board or PMs. We love you, your spirit, and are cheering for you at every moment.
42 yr. old female
Rectal cancer Stage 3C T3 N1 M0 - Sept 2015
28 rounds radiation w/Xeloda - Nov - Dec 2015
2/17/16 - Surgery to remove rectal tumor, lymph nodes (2/20+), ovaries & fallopian tubes, temp. ileostomy
3/28/16 - 9/26/16 -12 rounds FOLFOX w/full oxi
Ileo reversal 10/27/16; Port removed 12/1/16
Lung mets confirmed 2/6/17
March-May 2017 - brain mets; brain rad. 5/9-5/29/17

Posts: 273
Joined: Sat Jul 02, 2016 10:26 pm
Location: Syracuse, NY

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby fumaros » Thu Jun 15, 2017 8:12 am


We are all solidly behind you if you ever need us. I am so glad the Keytruda treatment is working, and despite the circumstances you are getting your life back. Sorry to hear about your husband of course, it is a terrible realization to have. I pray and wish you great strength to keep fighting the many battles life throws our way. All the best with July, i really wish larry gets his eviction notice. Stay strong.
Diagnosed 4/8/16, age 29
Colectomy 4/20/16
Stage III, T4bN1 Tumor 7x6.5x2. Muscinous Adenocarcinoma with SRC features
2/16 lymph nodes
Stage IV, Peri mets 5/2019
CEA 4/14/16 - 16.8
CEA 6/2/16 - 1.9
CEA 6/17/16 - 0.87, 7/16 - 1.33, 12/16 - 1.14, 4/17 - 0.6, 7/17 - 0.5, 10/17 - 0.9, 3/19 -5.8, 4/19 -10
FOLFOX began 6/24/16 - 11/25/16, FOLFIRI - 5/10/19
10 round FOLFOX, 2 round 5-FU & Leucovorin, 1 round FOLFIRI
MRI & CT 8/16 - NED, CT 12/16 - 10/17 - NED

Posts: 6202
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby Lee » Thu Jun 15, 2017 8:38 am

Well crap!

So glad to hear about Larry's eviction. Butt BM I am so sorry about your marriage. Your DH is being a real a**hole and karma will bite him some day soon. Had a neighbor, husband cheated on wife and like your DH, he wanted a divorce. It was less than 6 months later and he was living with girlfriend when he realized he had made the BIGGEST MISTAKE of his life. He ended the affair and stopped divorce proceeding, butt the damage was already done. Last I heard from her, they were still married, butt living 2 separate lives in separate homes. He was still hoping to win her back, as far as she was concerned it was over. They were still married because it helped her financially, butt she was done with him and men in general. Someday your DH will realized what he did, and he will regret it.


rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

Posts: 50
Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2017 6:13 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby inorganic8 » Thu Jun 15, 2017 10:08 am

Oy! Beansmama, we've never conversed, but I think about you often. I am a caregiver, not a patient. I can't imagine that additional level of stress on top of the overwhelming stress of getting through each day with cancer. Here's what I hope and pray and wish for you:
1. Next month you will be NEL (No evidence of Larry)
2. You will do whatever other treatments you need and just keep feeling better and better until you are officially NED.
3. You live a long, happy, fulfilling life.
4. It would be nice if this jack wagon realized the magnitude of his mistake and the hurt he caused you, but you'll be too busy with item 3 on this list. Success is by far the best revenge.
5. If some multi-billionaire falls madly in love with you, that's just icing on the cake.

Wife to DH with CRC
Stage IV Diagnosis 1/27/17, Mets to Liver, Omentum, Peri
KRAS Mutation, G12, MSS
Folfirinox 2/8/17
Folfiri 6/14/17
Nov. scan - disease progression
1/24/18 15-hour HIPEC surgery.
June 2018 It's back, starting Stivarga
Aug. 2018 stopping Stivarga
Sep. 2018 clinical trial of Keytruda and ibrutanib
Dec. 2018 disease progression, stopped trial
Jan. 2019 small bowel obstruction and surgery
Mar. 2019 clinical trial TAK-164
May 2019 deteriorating rapidly
June 12, 2019 At Peace

Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2016 12:27 pm

Re: Beansmama Checking in

Postby Dan95 » Thu Jun 15, 2017 10:30 am

Good to hear you're finally doing well on the cancer front. You are an inspiration.
Your husband threw away something good. He'll soon regret it.
64 yo Male
Stage IV adenocarcinoma SRC
Diagnosed 08/16
CEA: 9/16- 32.6, 10/21- 23.7, 11/18- 21.8 12/16 24.4 5/17 30.0
Neoadjuvent Folfox start 09/23
CT 12/16 tumor modestly reduced, but Pulmonary Embolism discovered. Start Lovenox
3/17 Right Hemicolectomy scheduled but aborted. HIPEC scheduled. Loop ileostomy.
4/17 Right hemi, duodenum resection, numerous tumor removed from peritinium, HIPEC delayed.
6/17 Start folfiri

Return to “Colon Talk - Colon cancer (colorectal cancer) support forum”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests