Another day - I'm thankful to still be here, fucked up right arm & hand, and persistent dizziness aside. Continuing to count my blessings as things could be worse, as we know all too well on this board!
I remain ever grateful for the lovely folks on this forum - your cheer-leading helps me more than you know! Last night as I was prepping dinner (a friend made turkey & sausage gumbo - yum! which I had over that 'evil demon' known as white rice - gasp!) it
really, truly dawned on me how MUCH I value quality of life over quantity. Yes, I've said it before, but for some reason last night it really struck me. What's the point of being on this planet if you're going to feel constantly deprived, grumpy, in pain/discomfort/misery, what-have-you? Make the effing most of each day and live it as fearlessly, joyfully, and without regret as much as effing possible, I say!
My 'energy healing friend,' during our visit that evening while I was in hospital (the same night she insinuated I was digging my grave with my teeth if I didn't change my evil dietary ways!) told me of a woman she had worked with, but then refused to. The woman was from a large Italian family and commented that she'd ''rather die than change" her diet. Well, damnit - that's her choice. If someone can be happy living his/her life while denying him/herself favorite foods or entire food groups, more power to them. But that's not for everyone. And as it's been pointed out, we can't ever be certain dietary changes are responsible for remission, cure, etc.
We each have our own little path on this unfortunate, unwanted walk we must take, and I think listening to our inner voices, doing what PLEASES us at a time when
so few things do, is CRUCIAL. Trying to control
anything in life, particularly something as unfair, erratic, and complicated as cancer, is futile, and will only result in wasting precious energy that is better spent elsewhere . . . like drinking a cold glass of chocolate milk, taking time to pet my dog in the morning, reading a book, doing laundry, or watching frivolous but
wonderfully distracting You Tube videos.
That's my two cents for the day.
Cheers to my co-warriors in this fight - hope y'all are all having the best day possible! Let's kick some cancer ass!!!!!
42 yr. old female
Rectal cancer Stage 3C T3 N1 M0 - Sept 2015
28 rounds radiation w/Xeloda - Nov - Dec 2015
2/17/16 - Surgery to remove rectal tumor, lymph nodes (2/20+), ovaries & fallopian tubes, temp. ileostomy
3/28/16 - 9/26/16 -12 rounds FOLFOX w/full oxi
Ileo reversal 10/27/16; Port removed 12/1/16
Lung mets confirmed 2/6/17
March-May 2017 - brain mets; brain rad. 5/9-5/29/17