Thanks everyone. We live in Europe, so everything is a bit different here, but I'll take all the advice I can get
My mom is taking meds to stop the diarrhea, it hasn't kicked in 100% yet, but hopefuly it will. She's started to feel slighty better, probably because she's now able to get some nutrion/calories from the food and drinks she gets. She's still way too skinny, weak and frail and I have no idea how she's going to be able to make it to the chemo treatment that is supposed to start next week.
My mom has a rectal tumor that really bothers her. Passing gas and stools is incredibly painful and she has lost control of the sphincter muscles, so she's wearing diapers. She never knows when, how much and whether diaper will leak. Sorry if I'm being too literate. But because of this, it's completely unthinkable for her to leave her home. She won' even let me take her for a drive. Also painful for her to sit up because the rectal tumor is now so close to the av and there are no muscles or fat left on her butt.
Docs have said that exercise is good and that it's important she's stays active. However, my mom has never been physically active and the past couple of months she has been lying in bed, only getting up when she needed to go to the bathroom. I try to drag her out of the bed, urge her to walk a few rounds every so often, but she is not easy to work with. She doesn't have any energy and her muscles have completely disappeared, so there's a huge barrier for her to get out of that freaking bed. Really frustrating and I don't know what to do.
I've read a lot about diet and supplements on this board. I've also talked to a nutritionist about what to cook for her to help her gain (or keep) weight. I've done a lot of research and really want her to benefit from everything that I've learned, and also follow doctors' and nutritionist's advice, but it doesn't always feel like my mom and I are on the same team. She's soooo reluctant to get up on her feet, move around, eat or drink the energy-protein-vitamin-loaded food and drink I serve for her. I serve very small portions, I know that's the way to go. I try to be very positive with her - encourage, cheer and applaud, being careful not to criticize - but when I get home, I'm soooo frustrated that I want to scream. One day when she must have sensed my frustration, she snapped at me saying "I'm doing everything I can". But my problem is that honestly, I don't think she's doing enough. To me, it looks like she's hardly doing anything at all. I know I may sound like a terrible and disrespectful daughter, but I really needed to vent those feelings. Maybe I need to see a counselor. Has anybody has similar issues, would like to hear from you.