It was two years ago today that I had my colonoscopy and woke up to the doctor saying "It's cancer. I'll be sending it out for tests to make it official, but I can tell just by looking at it that's it's cancer." I was hoping it was a sick April Fool's joke one day late, but nope, it was cancer.
I've been through a lot in the last two years and I've learned a lot, too.
I'm glad I kept a journal during those first few months because even though it's hard to read, I'm glad I have that plus my posts on here and my FB posts to remind me how I felt and what I was thinking through all the steps of this journey. One thing I know for sure, the members here kept me sane (well, sane might not be the best description for me, but as close to sane as it's possible for me to be
Through every new and scary step, from the overwhelming first days, to difficult decisions, through radiation/Xeloda, through surgery and my open wound, through problems with my ileostomy and my bad reaction to Folfox, and now through the issues with reversal, members have been supportive and kind and full of helpful advice each and every time. Having cancer was a horrible experience, but it would have been at least ten times worse without the information and support I found here at Colon Talk. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart and especially from the bottom of my colon. Your friendship helped the pain in both places.
And just in case there are other weirdies like me out there whose CEA scores are super high but their doctors can't find any sign of spread, I want you to know that despite my scary CEA's in my signature, two years later my scans are still clean and my CEA hasn't been over 3 since my LAR, so you aren't alone. Despite what the internet will tell you, you can have a CEA over 100 and not have spread to other organs.
Thank you to those who started Colon Talk and to the moderators who keep it running and to the members, new and longterm, who make it such an invaluable place for those with colorectal cancer, their caregivers, people who fear they might have the disease, and those coping with the aftereffects of the treatments. I know you've touched more lives and helped more people than you'll ever realize.