3shewolf8 wrote:Hello everyone. Now it has been over a year since I posted on here. My friend decided to retire and spend as much time as she has left enjoying her grandkids. She has basically disappeared from my social circle. She posts on FB every now and again, but when I text or message her, she replies with one word responses or not at all. I found out that she is in a trial to see if the doctors can buy more time for her. At her last test, the tumors are growing again. over 21% growth was shown after a few months on the trial. She is unable to process the contrast due to her low kidney functions. She is not being social at all, rarely leaves the house and stays inside. after I sent her a message on FB telling her that I missed her and asking how she was doing, she unfriended me. I am taking this as the final "push away" or "please don't contact me" not so subtle message. From my earlier posts, you can see that she pushed me away before, and some of your replies said that maybe I am a reminder of the life that she no longer has. I agreed, but then she reached out to me. Now, she is closing me off all the way. I am not overbearing, I didn't "bother her" very often, and had commented only positive messages on any of her FB posts. She was posting pictures of her grandkids, or talking about how much she loves spending time with her family, very rarely did she mention her cancer, and I didn't either. I want to thank you all for your suggestions and comments to me on how to handle losing her as a friend. I will never be able to understand what she is going through, so I am following her lead.
I'm sorry you find yourself in this situation. People have different attitudes towards the end. I've seen at least one case like your friend. She cut the strings with everyone except her close family. On the opposite road, there was a man that, when given days to live, asked all of his friends to come to see him at his deathbed... We're all different and only God knows how we'll react when our time comes.
Personally, everyday is different for me... Although I'm not terminal yet, I'm severly ill. There have been times when I didn't want to talk to my friends because, as other have said here, I couldn't stand the thought of them going out and about, living their lives, whereas I was planning my funeral... However, other times I enjoy talking to my friends and learning what they're up to...
Hugs.
Paola
DX 2019 Adenocarcinoma Sigmoid colon. PC + ovarian met.
Obstruction. Temporary colostomy.
Folfirinox + Avastin: 6 cycles. Scans: partial response.
Surgery (CRS + HIPEC) 04/29: too much disease, surgery cancelled. Right ovary removed.
2nd ptotocol: IP chemo (oxaliplatin) + IV chemo (Folfiri + Avastin). 8 cycles
10/31/2019: 11 hour-long Hipec + 6 weeks in hospital
12/30/2019: liver met
02/05/2020: reversal surgery. New peri mets discovered
March 2020: 5fu+Avastin
May 2020: fistula
Back to 1957: 5fu.