Checklist for spouse upon my demise

[BrianMc7]

Not a really positive post, but it does concern me.

When I was first diagnosed 4 years ago, an Oncologist suggested that I "go home and get my affairs in order". I've done some of that like getting a living will and my wishes that no heroic measures to be taken (sorry forgot the formal name). But more practical, what should my wife do if I don't wake up tomorrow? I posed the question to our HR department today and they said to call the main office number and ask for HR. Other things I worry about are things like our cell phones. My daughter went in the other day to get on our plan, but couldn't because I, as the account holder, wasn't with her. I know things like cell phone accounts are unimportant in the long run, but I would like to make the transition for my wife and children as painless as possible.

Does anyone know of a checklist of things that I should look into "taking care" of before the actual date of my passing?

Thanks,
Brian

[juliej]

There is a long doc (46 pages) at the U.S. State Department that's meant to contain all the information your family needs to know in case you become "incapicated." It has sections for things like logins and passwords for utilities, etc. You might take a look at it.

What it's missing though is the more mundane stuff that husbands often do for their wives, like how to turn off the water to the whole house, etc. I would like to see a doc include those kind of things.

http://www.state.gov/documents/organization/154946.pdf

[ktwmn]

Brian, Interesting that you should post this because I have thought about all those things. I dont have any advice--I don't have anyone living with me but perhaps family of origin would take care of selling the house etc. But now paying bills has become so complex (as you write about your daughters cell phone) I would have to print out every monthly bill and indicate the user name and password for each so that the living can access the account to make a payment and also to eventually cancel the account.

I think in your case making sure they can access things like banking, insurance and retirement are the main things. As I said I considered a list of all monthly quarterly and annual bills, user names and passwords. It will be interesting to see what others have to say. Just saw Julie's post, excellent!

[BeansMama]

I would do as everyone said above, but also regarding the cell phone - call the companies customer service department. Our cell bill is in my name, I have added my husband as an authorized person on the account, all he needs is my ssn (which of course he has access to) and he can make changes to the account. Having your wife as a user like that should make it easier for her to change everything over.

We have that setup for car payments etc as well. With me being sick he handles all the bills now, it was easier to set it up like that in case there is a problem. He can call and deal with issues with any of the bills that are in my name.

[janklo]

When our daughter was sick at the end, we had a legal power of attorney so we could access her accounts and such. She kept all her account info in a spreadsheet in her computer with the website, account info and password. In the last few weeks, she was unable to make decisions about bills and things, so I was able to do it.

I work in payroll and we do handle all the final paycheck, insurance and retirement details. We've had a few employees pass suddenly and we are happy to help their families with anything.

[wwroam]

Now that my partner is seeing good results from her 2nd line chemo ( Folfiri + Erbitux) there is less urgency in getting affairs sorted. She still owns her own house which is being prepared for sale .The proceeds will be split between her 2 adult children. After that her superannuation fund will have to be cashed in and also split amongst the children.
At home there is nothing to be done. I'm trying to slow her down as it all seems so final but she doesn't want me to be left to finalize her affairs.

[BrianMc7]

There is a long doc (46 pages) at the U.S. State Department that's meant to contain all the information your family needs to know in case you become "incapicated." It has sections for things like logins and passwords for utilities, etc. You might take a look at it.

What it's missing though is the more mundane stuff that husbands often do for their wives, like how to turn off the water to the whole house, etc. I would like to see a doc include those kind of things.

http://www.state.gov/documents/organization/154946.pdf

Awesome, thanks juliej.

Brian