Postby Val*pal » Mon Jul 20, 2015 12:07 pm
I'm so sorry that your little girl has to go through this. As others have said, I would recommend speaking to a child therapist to find the best way to help her deal with what will happen.
One thing I think that is important to keep in mind is that life is full of loss. None of us can escape it, not even precious 5 year olds. Adults do children a disservice, in my opinion, in trying to paint a picture of life always being fair and happy. I'm sure your daughter by osmosis has already come to realize that life can be tough. It's how she is taught to deal with the loss that is important.
I was raised with a somewhat unrealistic understanding of life. Whenever I felt I had failed at something, it caused me so much shame because I believed that it must be totally my fault since life should be perfect. As life will, it finally taught me that to be human means you will have joy, happiness, and love, but you will also have tremendous sadness, loss, fear, and failure. This is the human condition.
I'm a mom and I know how much we want to protect our children. It will hurt so much to see your daughter hurting, but keep in mind that it is one of life's hurdles. It will make your daughter into the person she will be. As long as she realizes that life isn't one endless fairy tale, she'll survive and thrive. Just let her talk about her feelings.
DH dx'ed May '11, age 62
Jul '11: resection Stage IV
10/11: 6 mo Folfox
8/12:thyr canc, surg/tx
2/13: peri mets
2/13: Firi/Avas
6/13: Ok
8/13: break
10/13: Lung, peri, mets
10/13: Firi/Erb
1/14: Erb Fail; spread
5/14: Tx stopped
6/20/14: At rest