scottyg wrote:He said that while he never wants to see combat again he missed that feeling of being so very alive. Life goes on.
There was a person a couple of years ago that spoke of this. He was flamed badly by some people that I respect. He was accused of being ungrateful, of being insulting to
those still in active treatment. I realized then that what I was / am going thru was not part of the accepted dialog around here.
lilacbreastedroller wrote:I'm with you on the stopping posting. I don't understand why healthy people, or caregivers whose partners have died, still post here!! And on other cancer boards. I can see them posting for a few months, maybe to sort out their grief (caregivers) or people who are NED with scanxiety and want to express it to people who understand, but after being NED for several years. Go! Walk out that door! Dont' come back to bother me (that's a song - from I will survive.) If I'm ever NED (not likely), I am NOT hanging around. I want to reclaim my life, or new life as you've described - not quite the old one but alive and not sick all the time.
I've seen people who've been NED for five years post once a day on these boards. Another woman was stage II and NED for ten years and posted a lot. Get a life! Seriously. Why do they not want to join the "land of the living" as I call it? And they aren't particularly helpful on the boards because their cancer experience is outdated. They haven't taken the new chemos, they aren't up-to-date on the new ablation techniques. Ditto with the caregivers. Go! Your husband's been dead for two years, MOVE ON!!! I've seen some former caregivers who live on these boards still. This not healthy, I don't think. Same problem with outdated info.
Sure, those of you who become NED maybe might want to check in once a year. Another board, CSN, does the semi-colon roll call when long-term survivors check in around Christmastime. That is inspirational because people like you, who have survived Stage IV, tell their stories and say "I'm Still Standing" and give the rest of us hope. That is amazing.
but to stay on these boards continuously, as a well person, and be part of a community of people with cancer, when you don't have cancer anymore (yay!) - why dwell in the past, particularly in a painful part of your past you'd rather not dwell on?
So congrats on your NED status, and I totally understand why you don't want to post anymore. Get on with your life! As you said, it's a different life, but it is yours! You've earned it. Caregivers with dead husbands or wives - move on too. Focus your energies on something other than cancer as it no longer rules you.
Karin
lilacbreastedroller wrote:I'm with you on the stopping posting. I don't understand why healthy people, or caregivers whose partners have died, still post here!! And on other cancer boards. I can see them posting for a few months, maybe to sort out their grief (caregivers) or people who are NED with scanxiety and want to express it to people who understand, but after being NED for several years. Go! Walk out that door! Dont' come back to bother me (that's a song - from I will survive.) If I'm ever NED (not likely), I am NOT hanging around. I want to reclaim my life, or new life as you've described - not quite the old one but alive and not sick all the time.
I've seen people who've been NED for five years post once a day on these boards. Another woman was stage II and NED for ten years and posted a lot. Get a life! Seriously. Why do they not want to join the "land of the living" as I call it? And they aren't particularly helpful on the boards because their cancer experience is outdated. They haven't taken the new chemos, they aren't up-to-date on the new ablation techniques. Ditto with the caregivers. Go! Your husband's been dead for two years, MOVE ON!!! I've seen some former caregivers who live on these boards still. This not healthy, I don't think. Same problem with outdated info.
Sure, those of you who become NED maybe might want to check in once a year. Another board, CSN, does the semi-colon roll call when long-term survivors check in around Christmastime. That is inspirational because people like you, who have survived Stage IV, tell their stories and say "I'm Still Standing" and give the rest of us hope. That is amazing.
but to stay on these boards continuously, as a well person, and be part of a community of people with cancer, when you don't have cancer anymore (yay!) - why dwell in the past, particularly in a painful part of your past you'd rather not dwell on?
So congrats on your NED status, and I totally understand why you don't want to post anymore. Get on with your life! As you said, it's a different life, but it is yours! You've earned it. Caregivers with dead husbands or wives - move on too. Focus your energies on something other than cancer as it no longer rules you.
Karin
lilacbreastedroller wrote:I'm with you on the stopping posting. I don't understand why healthy people, or caregivers whose partners have died, still post here!! And on other cancer boards. I can see them posting for a few months, maybe to sort out their grief (caregivers) or people who are NED with scanxiety and want to express it to people who understand, but after being NED for several years. Go! Walk out that door! Dont' come back to bother me (that's a song - from I will survive.) If I'm ever NED (not likely), I am NOT hanging around. I want to reclaim my life, or new life as you've described - not quite the old one but alive and not sick all the time.
I've seen people who've been NED for five years post once a day on these boards. Another woman was stage II and NED for ten years and posted a lot. Get a life! Seriously. Why do they not want to join the "land of the living" as I call it? And they aren't particularly helpful on the boards because their cancer experience is outdated. They haven't taken the new chemos, they aren't up-to-date on the new ablation techniques. Ditto with the caregivers. Go! Your husband's been dead for two years, MOVE ON!!! I've seen some former caregivers who live on these boards still. This not healthy, I don't think. Same problem with outdated info.
Sure, those of you who become NED maybe might want to check in once a year. Another board, CSN, does the semi-colon roll call when long-term survivors check in around Christmastime. That is inspirational because people like you, who have survived Stage IV, tell their stories and say "I'm Still Standing" and give the rest of us hope. That is amazing.
but to stay on these boards continuously, as a well person, and be part of a community of people with cancer, when you don't have cancer anymore (yay!) - why dwell in the past, particularly in a painful part of your past you'd rather not dwell on?
So congrats on your NED status, and I totally understand why you don't want to post anymore. Get on with your life! As you said, it's a different life, but it is yours! You've earned it. Caregivers with dead husbands or wives - move on too. Focus your energies on something other than cancer as it no longer rules you.
Karin
lilacbreastedroller wrote:I'm with you on the stopping posting. I don't understand why healthy people, or caregivers whose partners have died, still post here!! And on other cancer boards. I can see them posting for a few months, maybe to sort out their grief (caregivers) or people who are NED with scanxiety and want to express it to people who understand, but after being NED for several years. Go! Walk out that door! Dont' come back to bother me (that's a song - from I will survive.) If I'm ever NED (not likely), I am NOT hanging around. I want to reclaim my life, or new life as you've described - not quite the old one but alive and not sick all the time.
I've seen people who've been NED for five years post once a day on these boards. Another woman was stage II and NED for ten years and posted a lot. Get a life! Seriously. Why do they not want to join the "land of the living" as I call it? And they aren't particularly helpful on the boards because their cancer experience is outdated. They haven't taken the new chemos, they aren't up-to-date on the new ablation techniques. Ditto with the caregivers. Go! Your husband's been dead for two years, MOVE ON!!! I've seen some former caregivers who live on these boards still. This not healthy, I don't think. Same problem with outdated info.
Sure, those of you who become NED maybe might want to check in once a year. Another board, CSN, does the semi-colon roll call when long-term survivors check in around Christmastime. That is inspirational because people like you, who have survived Stage IV, tell their stories and say "I'm Still Standing" and give the rest of us hope. That is amazing.
but to stay on these boards continuously, as a well person, and be part of a community of people with cancer, when you don't have cancer anymore (yay!) - why dwell in the past, particularly in a painful part of your past you'd rather not dwell on?
So congrats on your NED status, and I totally understand why you don't want to post anymore. Get on with your life! As you said, it's a different life, but it is yours! You've earned it. Caregivers with dead husbands or wives - move on too. Focus your energies on something other than cancer as it no longer rules you.
Karin
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