The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

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Frenchie's Wife
Posts: 959
Joined: Sat May 04, 2013 1:01 pm
Location: Alberta, Canada

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Frenchie's Wife » Thu Jun 22, 2017 8:06 pm

Lee wrote:Hi Diane,


I also hope he can get one more day in at the casino.


Lee


Hi Lee,

Ron stopped going to the casino a few months ago as it was costing him to much money. He suddenly realized his brain was no longer clear enough to play the VLTs any more (I was so happy about his stopping) :D

Diane
Caregiver to DH 59 yr, male, Stage IV at Dx
Dx Sept 2009
Liver,bladder mets, 5 surgeries
Lots of chemo
Inoperable lung mets nov 2013
Stopped all treatments in February 2014 due to QOL issues
I am in God's hands now !!
Feb 2015 - too many new mets to count !
At peace July 9, 2017

Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Lee » Thu Jun 22, 2017 8:17 pm

Frenchie wrote:
Lee wrote:Hi Diane,


I also hope he can get one more day in at the casino.


Lee


Hi Lee,

Ron stopped going to the casino a few months ago as it was costing him to much money. He suddenly realized his brain was no longer clear enough to play the VLTs any more (I was so happy about his stopping) :D

Diane


Hi Diane,

Okay, disregard my comment, I was not aware of that. I still hope he can enjoy this summer.

All the best,

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

canadiandaughter
Posts: 676
Joined: Sun Aug 17, 2014 11:19 am

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby canadiandaughter » Thu Jun 22, 2017 9:59 pm

So sorry to hear things are not going well for Frenchie. That is so hard when the medicine that helps with the pain causes other issues. I hope they can get things sorted out for him to give him some relief.
I am not exactly sure where you live, but would he be able to get home care in to help you out? I know that my dad, like Frenchie, wanted to remain at home. They lived in Innisfail, which isn't that big of a town. We were able to get home care for him. We had a RN who was in charge of dads file. We were allowed 4 visits a day from the Health care aids to help with toileting, bathing and dressing. We could call 24/7 and talk to an RN instead of running to emerg. They would advise us. We had RNs come to the house to check on dad. They even talked to his doctor to change any pain meds etc or address any concerns. I know here in Alberta this is free, so that helps. The RN even helped make arrangements when we decided we could not manage dad at home, which was 3 days prior to his passing. It was reassuring to have that person you could get anytime we needed help. I know my moms biggest fear was that my dad would pass away and she would be alone with him, they even gave her their number to call should that have happened. We even had respite care come one day so we could get out. I believe we were allowed to have that 2x a week for 4 hours at time. I know they were SO accommodating and wanted to do anything they could to help us keep dad where he wanted to be. One thing that was nice, was that we did not have to take dad to appointments, the RN came to him and would deal with whatever problem he had. We did not have IV's or anything for dad. He had just started taking a morphine pill a week before he passed. We also had a occupational therapist come to the house and help us get the different bars etc in place that would help dad. We are so blessed here to have so many services free. I believe there was even a dietitian that came to help mom with a food plan for dad.
If it helps ease your mind at all, we felt so bad when we had to take dad to the hospital, but he knew it was best and was not angry at us at all. They know when they need more help then what we can provide at home. It is better for everyone, actually safer for everyone when the time comes. Hugs to you both. I hope Frenchie can enjoy some of these summer days now that is it finally here. Hopefully you are not getting this nasty wind down your way that we have been getting.
DD to 81 year old father
dx 24/07/14 iv cc mets liver/lung
folifiri started 19/07/14
shrinkage of all mets
growth in the liver,started folfox/avastin 80% 13/01/16
reduced to 70% due to side effects 27/01/16
First scan on folfox shows shrinkage in lungs, but liver just stable
6 rounds of vectibix-fail. 3cm growth and new spots showing Waiting for panel recommendations
At peace January 8, 2017

bitchslapped
Posts: 1538
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2014 3:23 pm
Location: PNW/USA

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby bitchslapped » Wed Jun 28, 2017 11:01 am

Yes, those are rough meetings, emotional meetings for patient & family. I find it quite amazing that Frenchie could walk that far a few months ago. He truly is a champion.

Sending best wishes to both of you.

BS
DSS,35YO,unresect mCRC DX 7/'14,lvr,LN,peri,rib
FOLFOX+Avstn 4 Rnds d/c 10/'14
Stent 9/'14
FOLFIRI+Avstn 10/'14
Gone From My Sight 2/20/15
Me:garden variety polyps + precancerous polyp, diverticulitis
Carergver x2 DH,DM dbl occupancy,'03-'10
DH dx 47YO mCRC,'04-'07, lvr, billiary tree fried x HAI
DM dx CC 85YO,CC,CHF,stroke,dementia,aphasia

Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Lee » Sat Jul 01, 2017 11:01 pm

HI Frenchie and Diane,

Thinking of you both. I believe it is Canada Day in your neck of the woods. Enjoy!

Post when you can,

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

User avatar
Frenchie's Wife
Posts: 959
Joined: Sat May 04, 2013 1:01 pm
Location: Alberta, Canada

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Frenchie's Wife » Tue Jul 04, 2017 10:18 pm

Hello everyone,

Canada Day has come and gone here but we were graced with a visit from Ron's daughter for 5 days. Ron felt guilty that he could not do anything with her, butt she was here just to be with him. All in all it was a good visit. Prior to that we have a visit from his grandson and girlfriend. That was a treat for sure.

Sunday I packed up Ron and we drove out to the campground to see his brother. I was a warm day BUTT in the shade it was nice. Seems it was still to warm for Ron as he was sick about 3 hours after we got there and all the way home. Puke city into a couple of shopping bags with the windows rolled down so I didn't join him...lol

Today was follow-up with doctor, I was not able to go so I had an update from the home care nurse. He has another bladder infection, has stumbled on his way to the bathroom during the night (he still won't sleep in our bed which is closer to the bathroom) so the doctor once again talked in length about the benefits of palative care. They also cover everything that can be done at home for him BUTT his health has changed so much in two weeks, since his last visit with the doctor, that she is thinking 4-6 weeks. He can stay at home as long as it is possible BUTT at some point the palative unit will be where he will have to be.

I have to say it was an emotional day for me, I am ready for this BUTT reality still bites.

Diane
Caregiver to DH 59 yr, male, Stage IV at Dx
Dx Sept 2009
Liver,bladder mets, 5 surgeries
Lots of chemo
Inoperable lung mets nov 2013
Stopped all treatments in February 2014 due to QOL issues
I am in God's hands now !!
Feb 2015 - too many new mets to count !
At peace July 9, 2017

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LeonW
Posts: 358
Joined: Sun May 03, 2015 4:59 pm
Location: Amsterdam, Netherlands

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby LeonW » Wed Jul 05, 2017 5:11 am

Thanks Diana for the update.

I think I realize how difficult and hard it must be to write about the way things are progressing, but do know how much we appreciate being aware how things are developing for our friend Frenchy. Tell him that we care.

Wishing Frenchie, you and his family/friends strength in these difficult days.

that there may be more summer days that he may enjoy in company of his loved ones.
Leon
Dec 2012 - CC 2 unresect liver mets, CEA 41.8 (MM 65yrs)
Jan 2013 - colectomy @ spleen 2/26 nodes IVa T3N1bM1a
Feb-Jul - 1x Xelox-7x Xelox/Avastin, shrinkage from #3
Aug - 2x PV embolization (both failed)
Sep 2013 - R liver resect, 25d hosp (liver failure/delirium, lung emboli, encephalopathy), no living cancer (pCR)
2014/15 - recovery, scopy: 2 polyps
2016 - new town/life
2018, scopy: 2 polyps
2018/20 low (1.0-1.4) CEAs/clean CTs: 4x2014, 6x2015-17, 3x2018-20
next June 2021!

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Sharon Brent
Posts: 288
Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2014 5:19 am
Location: London England

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Sharon Brent » Wed Jul 05, 2017 10:48 am

Hi Diane,

Thanks a lot for the update, it's a hard time for the both of you, but your doing an amazing Job and Ron is always ready for a fight when it comes to Cancer.

Sending you blessings, kisses and love
Piyagarn
DH, 47yo, Dx Stg IV, mCRC, lvr, lng 1/14, Tx Capeciabine 9 rnds
Children 5 & 1
DH 48th Birthday 6 November in Hospital
Home palliative care on 12 November 2014
Called back to Jesus 4pm 15 November 2014
Life Celebration in Nigeria 8 January 2015

canadiandaughter
Posts: 676
Joined: Sun Aug 17, 2014 11:19 am

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby canadiandaughter » Wed Jul 05, 2017 1:25 pm

Thank you so much for the update Dianne. I know you are dealing with all of your own emotions at this stage and it is so kind of you to keep us updated on how Frenchie is doing. I am so glad he is getting some time with family, that is so important for him and them. I remember how my dads face would light up when people stopped to visit even though it is very hard for them to do given the circumstances. This heat wave we are in right now must be so hard on him, I hope he is getting some relief. I know where I am, there is no rain or cooler temps in sight in the 14 day forecast.
I am sorry to hear he has another bladder infection. I know my dad had no pain with his, we only knew because he was acting out of sorts and then his legs wouldn't work properly. I am glad to hear you have homecare in place, they can be a lot of help and peace of mind for you the caregiver.
Please give Frenchie a gently hug from a fellow Albertan. I pray for strength for you in the coming weeks and that they can keep Frenchie as painfree and peaceful as possible. You are all in my thoughts. Remember to take care of yourself to! Hugs.
DD to 81 year old father
dx 24/07/14 iv cc mets liver/lung
folifiri started 19/07/14
shrinkage of all mets
growth in the liver,started folfox/avastin 80% 13/01/16
reduced to 70% due to side effects 27/01/16
First scan on folfox shows shrinkage in lungs, but liver just stable
6 rounds of vectibix-fail. 3cm growth and new spots showing Waiting for panel recommendations
At peace January 8, 2017

Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Lee » Wed Jul 05, 2017 1:38 pm

LeonW wrote:I think I realize how difficult and hard it must be to write about the way things are progressing, but do know how much we appreciate being aware how things are developing for our friend Frenchy. Tell him that we care.


Could not have said it any better.

Diane, yes thank you for the update on our dear Frenchie. You both are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope and pray there are still some good days ahead. And that you both find comfort and support from family and friends in the days ahead.

(((Diane)))

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!

User avatar
Frenchie's Wife
Posts: 959
Joined: Sat May 04, 2013 1:01 pm
Location: Alberta, Canada

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Frenchie's Wife » Thu Jul 06, 2017 9:19 pm

I know the topic of this thread is about "the grim reaper taking another swipe at Ron" but I fear that the grim reaper has gotten his hooks into him and is not letting go this time.

Ron's daughter said her dad is like a cat with nine lives, but I told her he has used all of those nine lives to get to where he is today.

I see him slipping further and further away from me each day. He is now talking about going to Palative Care, I don't mind that if that is what he wants.

I just found out he has a son that has been keeping his family in the dark about his father's condition and how fast it is going. He has even kept his family from coming to see Ron. This last month when Ron had family visits I would take pictures of him with them for my memories and theirs, but I have none of the wife and two daughters of this one son. He wants to bring them down in two weeks, but I fear Ron will be bedridden and not in a communicative state.

Family is always so complicated when it should not be.

Diane
Caregiver to DH 59 yr, male, Stage IV at Dx
Dx Sept 2009
Liver,bladder mets, 5 surgeries
Lots of chemo
Inoperable lung mets nov 2013
Stopped all treatments in February 2014 due to QOL issues
I am in God's hands now !!
Feb 2015 - too many new mets to count !
At peace July 9, 2017

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CRguy
Posts: 10472
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby CRguy » Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:51 pm

Frenchie wrote:Family is always so complicated when it should not be.
Diane

WORD !

I feel you and Ron, Diane ... BTDT

WHAT is right for Ron is what has to happen.
What others "think", is what they will have to deal with after he is gone
and pretty much does NOT matter.

Those who love Ron ... without putting restrictions on what that means .. WILL be in his corner.

WE HERE ... are ALL in Ron's corner, and yours

Tell him I said so

HARMONY to you both
on the Journey
CRguy
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
17 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far

User avatar
Frenchie's Wife
Posts: 959
Joined: Sat May 04, 2013 1:01 pm
Location: Alberta, Canada

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Frenchie's Wife » Fri Jul 07, 2017 1:49 pm

CRguy wrote:
Frenchie wrote:Family is always so complicated when it should not be.
Diane

WORD !


WE HERE ... are ALL in Ron's corner, and yours


CRguy


Thank you all for that, you don't know how much that means to Ron and I.

The decision has been made and we are moving Ron to the Palative care unit in about half an hour. I can't believe how fast things have gone this week and overnight as well.
I hate to think that before to long I will be letting you all know of his passing as it seems to be moving in that direction so quickly.

He has fought a very long and courageous battle with this monster and I am so very proud to have been here with him. I will be there at his side to the very end :(

Diane
Caregiver to DH 59 yr, male, Stage IV at Dx
Dx Sept 2009
Liver,bladder mets, 5 surgeries
Lots of chemo
Inoperable lung mets nov 2013
Stopped all treatments in February 2014 due to QOL issues
I am in God's hands now !!
Feb 2015 - too many new mets to count !
At peace July 9, 2017

peanut_8
Posts: 2340
Joined: Sun May 25, 2014 1:31 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby peanut_8 » Fri Jul 07, 2017 2:13 pm

Thanks for the update Diane. Wish it was better news.
Please send my love to Ron, and save a bit for yourself.

Terri
female, diagnosed Jan 14, RC stage 2a, age 56
MSS
April 14, 28 chemo/rad with Xeloda
June 14 adjuvant Xeloda 6 rounds
currently NED

Lee
Posts: 6207
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2006 4:09 pm

Re: The Grim Reaper took another swipe at me !!

Postby Lee » Fri Jul 07, 2017 2:45 pm

Hi Diane,

Yes please pass along my love to Frenchie as well. I pray he is not in pain and still has a few days where he can spend quality time with family and friends.

Take care of yourself, know that we are here if you need to vent or what ever. (((Diane)))

Love you both,

Lee
rectal cancer - April 2004
46 yrs old at diagnoses
stage III C - 6/13 lymph positive
radiation - 6 weeks
surgery - August 2004/hernia repair 2014
permanent colostomy
chemo - FOLFOX
NED - 16 years and counting!


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