So good to see your post.
As someone who lost a parent in the Vietnam War, yes holidays can be "rough". So HAPPY to read, you will be with a friend. Please take up that friend offer. My family spent our 1st Christmas (with dad death) in a 2 bedroom house with 8+ people
Believe me, I slept on a floor that x-mas eve and was happy for the love/support from everyone making sure all was good. Actually we did that for 2 yrs before we could do it as a family alone. Today that other "mom" is always welcome to my house, all expense paid.
Know that you are stronger than you realize. Sorry for the car incident. So glad to hear the memorial went well. Dear son sounds just like dear old dad. Wonderful sense of humor. Your Dh husband had it.
Thinking of you and one other person (who lost someone close recently) this holiday season.
Thoughts and prayers to you both,