A BIG HUG sent out to you Helen. I am swinging chickens for you, and hope your surgery goes well- without any hitches. I am glad you are having some fun & are surrounded by family & friends who are there for you. Worth it's weight in gold, for sure.
I am totally frustrated, in that my mom's house sale is STILL dragging out. We are now down to the final day(s). We thought it would be this weekend that final papers would be signed & a move out date carved in stone. I find it outrageous we are left hanging, and will be given the move out date (3 day window- BUTT have to give them the date in stone!) once the papers are signed..... hoping for Monday-Tuesday for paperwork. SO, here we sit through yet another weekend by ourselves, an hour away. So close, yet so far away from being together. We started this crap mid March/ April.
My heart is with you, in hearing you speak of missing your dear wife. I get hit out of the blue in the oddest moments. Particularly when I am facing a major financial decision (The economy is set for a not so rosey future & it has me up at night fretting). He was my sounding board, and I am anxious for my mom to join me, so I can bounce things off of an adult. My sons are pretty overwhelmed with learning/ gearing our business up to the next step. So I have backed off with financial details- which piles them all on my shoulders ALONE..... which plays out to missing Mike even more. As if just losing him was not devastating enough!
I have fruit, flowers and avocados in full bloom throughout my 3/4 acre. I am now thinking of buying some raised planters for tomatoes, bell peppers, etc to add to the mix. It will give me pleasure to attend to them & something for mom to do once she gets here. At 79 she is very active. I am heading out to the garage to gut out layers of crap to get rid of. Partly to make room, partly to fit mom's van into. I HATE disorder. My youngest son adds to the disarray, with his fishing gear. I now have two boats in my front yard. One temporary to get ready to sell. Drives me nuts & I have small piles everywhere..... my head has not been into this for at least 1 1/2 years. I feel it staring at me
So better sign off & get to it, on my one day off/ week. OH JOY!
I root for you that are looking for a new relationship. For me, I simply have zero desire and don't think I ever will. Mike was THE love of my life, my best friend of 35 years. I think in my heart of hearts that I would always hold up any other man in comparison. They would fall too short, in comparison. Once you had a soulmate, it is hard to think of settling for anything less. Striking lightning twice would be nothing short of two miracles, and I do not see that remotely possible. I will have mom for a companion- that is good enough for me.... at least for this stage of the game of Life. I have learned that situations change, and nothing is set in stone- as things do change, go in 360 degree opposite directions.... "in the blink of an eye".
A Big HUG to everyone.