Chemo has stopped working - update 2/26/14

[kiwiinoz]

Ashlee
When I came on to this board you were one of the stoic members of the club and I always appreciated the way you faced up to the reality of this disease. The disease my be progessing, you may or may not go for clinical trials, but I consider how you faced this adversity a source of hope and an example of how cancer my dominate one's body but not your spirit.
Best wishes with your decision
Kiwi

[Maia]

Ashlee, may each one of your days be full of life, lived at its fullest -love, laughter, joy, peace.
All my love to you ((hug))

[mymom]

I am so sorry. I am thinking of you.

[stephh]

I'm so sorry to hear this Ashlee. You are one of the toughest people I know in this battle. You've been through so much. I completely understand your decision though. I think I'd do the same as you if I were in your situation. Enjoy the time you have which I feel will be longer than the doc expects. I imagine you will physically feel great being without chemo. Eat and drink how you feel! I've not been able to eat in over a year and a half due to surgical complications with this crappy cancer. I'd give anything to be able to eat anything again-including junk food! It's all about what I want at this point-not about what's healthy for me. Perhaps that's a bad way to look at it? I don't know. But I want to enjoy the time I have left as well.
Please keep us updated. We love and care for you.

[Rob in PA]

Keep proving them wrong Ashlee! U just never know.

Prayers with you friend.


Rob

[Lee]

Ashlee,

I'm so sorry to read this. I hope you have many goods days ahead.

I truly respect your words and wisdom! But as others have said, I secretly hope your Onc is wrong.

Thinking of you and hoping and praying your upcoming scan can have some good news for you.

Lee

[edinaman]

Ashlee, I am so sorry for your news. We are here for you on your journey, and support what choices you make.
Jeff

[tammylayne]

Ashlee...like so many others I am saddened by this news. May you have much, much MUCH more time then anyone knows, and may your days be gentle and kind to you. Live it your way....I can't imagine you doing it any differently.

[lauragb]

I am sorry to see this subject line but when I read down further I am picturing you enjoying some good quality time off the chemo and I hope that time
lasts for a good long while.

Laura

[weisssoccermom]

Ashlee,
I know that while this isn't the news you wanted to hear, you were prepared for it nevertheless. As you told me once, you knew that someday you would be presented with this news....you just didn't know when. I totally respect and understand your decisions...you've thought them out and you have to live your life the way that you want to. You truly are an amazing woman who has battled this disease with grace and dignity and I have no doubt that you will continue to do so in the upcoming days ahead. I hope that you are able to enjoy many chemo free days finding happiness in whatever activities and adventures that you choose to pursue. Please remember that we are here for you no matter what and I hope you will continue to frequent this site and keep us updated.
Hugs,
Jaynee

[chrissyrice]

Ashlee, you always said you would know when it was time to stop, so I am hoping that you have some good quality of life for the time that lies ahead.

I can tell you that you have always been one of my favorites on this board and I admire your choices in all that you have been through.

All of us will at some point follow you down this path to the end of our lives in this world. You have a wonderful legacy to leave us with. It is your legacy that matters most and what you have shared of yourself with others.

Whatever your beliefs or choices I support you with my kindness thoughts and prayers.

Much love,
Chrissy

[horizon]

I have nothing but respect for you and how you handle yourself in the face of this disease. You're one of my favorite people on here.

[Choijk]

Ashlee I have been following your posts since I've found this forum. I appreciate your realism and practicality. May you enjoy your chemo free days. Sending you blessings and positive thoughts.

[michelle c]

Dear Ashlee,

Thank you for the update. I have noticed your absence - you have been missed here. I wish the news was different for you. I'm assuming that your tumor markers have gone up. I'm sorry to hear your news and that you have to give up working. I know that you are a realist, and that you will do what you need to do for you. Continue to live life. You are in my thoughts and prayers, Ashlee.

Michelle xx

[CRguy]

I know I haven't been around much lately. For those of us who are dealing with the end stages of this disease, the deaths of Gloria, Kathryn, plus so many others the last few months have really sucked out a lot of the hope. I know some newbies and NED posters get upset when bad news is posted. I wish everyone here could say they are NED and never have to deal with cancer again.
My chemo has stopped working. There is nothing else to try. I'll have a scan next week just to see where I'm glowing. I'm now preparing to quit work which was a very hard decision to make. The ONC gives me 6 months. I know he isn't God - I could be gone in 3 months or 18 months. From other friends I've known from this board, they had some pretty good months once they stopped treatment. That is my intention as well - to enjoy days without chemo in my body and just be in the moment of living. -Ashlee

I haven't been around much either Ashlee. I would read but not post too much … just did the Mod thing in the background.
Vicariously I have just lived what you speak of, with my father.
It is a very surreal dynamic, in so many, too many, ways to even describe.

Newbies and NEDs notwithstanding my friend, while I would not rub anyone's face in reality, I'll be damned if I would sugarcoat it.

It IS what is … not what if.
Quality not quantity.

Life on your own terms …. damn the torpedoes … full steam ahead.

Peace, Love and Harmony,
on every Journey

CRguy