O/T …. the softer YIN side ..FINAL update

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CRguy
Posts: 10476
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

O/T …. the softer YIN side ..FINAL update

Postby CRguy » Sun Jan 12, 2014 1:53 am

For my Father
and dedicated to all on the Journey.

this could be a requiem
for a life well lived

this could be a legacy
for what one had to give

to life
to live.

this could be in harmony
with discord drawing near
this could be the final gasp
of life's breathe
we can hear

this could be
every
thing

or nothing we hold dear

this could be our finest hour
with heaven

drawing near


This IS what happens
when life reveals it's truth
this is all we hope to be

only faith .. no proof

who we are
and what we do
do not exist

the only toll we take
is on ourselves
and list ….
the losses and the sorrow
the joyous and the great

let us tell each other
we are just us
and not too late

we have lived our lives with grace
outlived and loved,
our fate

be still my friends
I have not left

I'm just at heaven's gate

-CRguy


Be still Dad
I love you

here at heaven's gate
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
17 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far

so-scared
Posts: 1059
Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2011 12:53 pm

Re: O/T ….

Postby so-scared » Sun Jan 12, 2014 3:39 am

This beautiful CR!! I am so sorry about the reason that you wrote it. I wish both you and your father peace.
DH 51 yo
dx 5/16/11 stg 4 RC
mets both lobes liver & lung
6/11 chem/rad
FOLFOX 9-12/11
12/11 TME/liver resect/rfa (15 tumors)
more Folfox w/Avastin
5/12 innumerable mets liver
Folfox/Avas FAIL
9/12 FOLFIRI/Erb FAIL
HAI pump 12/12
Had to leave 5/23/14

User avatar
CRguy
Posts: 10476
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

Re: O/T ….

Postby CRguy » Sun Jan 12, 2014 3:49 am

Thank you for seeing the beauty in the tragedy.
Harmony
CRguy
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
17 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far

Marian1961
Posts: 278
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2013 10:44 am

Re: O/T ….

Postby Marian1961 » Sun Jan 12, 2014 5:09 am

Wishing you and your Dad much peace today. And thank you for a beautiful poem.
Caregiver 53 brother
Dx 09/13 stage iv, met liver
Emergency stoma
? Chemo 09/30

ams5796
Posts: 2298
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2009 10:07 am

Re: O/T ….

Postby ams5796 » Sun Jan 12, 2014 7:45 am

CRGuy, So sorry you're at this point with your Dad. I wish both of you peace and love.





Ann
Stage 3C (or 4?) Rectal Cancer 01/07
2/10 lung mets
3/11 VATS
6/11 VATS
7/13 lung met
2/14 SBRT
NED 8/14
5/17 scan and MRI found treated spine met

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BrownBagger
Posts: 7954
Joined: Fri Jul 24, 2009 2:56 pm
Location: Central NYS

Re: O/T ….

Postby BrownBagger » Sun Jan 12, 2014 8:47 am

Something we prepare for, but are never prepared for.

Peace.
Eric, 58
Dx: 3/09, Stage 4 RC
Recurrences: (ongoing, lung, bronchial cavity, ribs)
Major Ops: 6/ RFA: 3 /bronchoscopies: 8
Pelvic radiation: 5 wks. Bronchial radiation—brachytheray: 3 treatments
Chemo Rounds (career):136
Current Chemo Cocktail: Xeloda & Erbitux & Irinotecan biweekly
Current Cocktail; On the Wagon (mostly)
Bicycle miles post-dx 10,477
Motto: Live your life like it's going to be a long one, because it just might, and then you'll be glad you did.

skypup
Posts: 2598
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2012 12:12 pm

Re: O/T ….

Postby skypup » Sun Jan 12, 2014 9:11 am

This is what it means to be on the journey together. Thank you for being here with us, too.

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Maia
Posts: 2443
Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 8:00 am

Re: O/T ….

Postby Maia » Sun Jan 12, 2014 9:37 am

Beautiful.
Holding you and your father in light, my friend. May your dad have happiness and the root of happiness. Be free from suffering and the root of suffering. May he not be separated from the great happiness devoid of suffering. May he dwell in the great equanimity, free from attachment to those near and aversion to those far.
In the journey with you,
love
m.

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abuttigi
Posts: 669
Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2011 9:39 am
Location: SE Michigan

Re: O/T ….

Postby abuttigi » Sun Jan 12, 2014 10:37 am

O CRGuy, I'm so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful tribute to your father.

Angie
Daughter to George (64)
Dx'ed Jan '11 Stage IV CC liver and peritoneum, KRAS mutant
Folfox
Folfori, Avastin
SIRT
Aug '12- progression in liver, mets to lungs
Oct '12- mets to bone, Regorafenib
Nov '12- Hospice
12/10/12- Became my beautiful angel in heaven

tammylayne
Posts: 2177
Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2010 9:24 am

Re: O/T ….

Postby tammylayne » Sun Jan 12, 2014 10:49 am

So beautifully thought and felt....so beautifully said.

So many twists and turns on this journey we call life, so many feelings and emotions. Thank you for always sharing yours in a way that makes us think and reflect.

Wishing you much peace and harmony at this time...and gentle hugs.
51 F
'06 Stage 1 CC,
'10 Stage 3 Rectal

"You never know how strong you are until you have to become your own hero."

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Voxx66
Posts: 1844
Joined: Wed Jul 24, 2013 10:22 pm
Facebook Username: Michael Void Ward

Re: O/T ….

Postby Voxx66 » Sun Jan 12, 2014 11:22 am

I'm sorry CR and I appreciate your ability to find beauty and peace even when dealing with an issue like this.
DX and resect 10/2012 age 46
Stage IIa CRC
liver mets both lobes 8/2013
CEA 28
FOLFOX + Avastin 8/26/13 3 rounds
Folfox only 3 rds + rd 8
platelets low round 7,9,10 5FU only
1/14 CEA 1.0 y90
5fu
10/14 mets lung and peri
1/15 Folfiri

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Bev G
Posts: 5856
Joined: Thu Jan 07, 2010 11:19 pm
Facebook Username: Bev Golde
Location: Quechee, VT

Re: O/T ….

Postby Bev G » Sun Jan 12, 2014 11:29 am

WORD. But no words. My heart is with you, CR.

Love,

Bev
58 yo Type1 DM 48 years
12/09 Stage IV 2/22 nodes + liver met, colon resec
3 tx FOLFIRI, liver resec 4/10
9/10 6 mos off chemo, Neg PET&CTC CEA nl
2/11 finished total 10 rounds chemo

9/13 ^17th clean PET/CT NED for now

NWgirl
Posts: 6659
Joined: Sat Feb 02, 2008 3:24 am
Facebook Username: Belle Piazza
Location: Battle Ground, Washington

Re: O/T ….

Postby NWgirl » Sun Jan 12, 2014 11:37 am

Thinking of you during this difficult time my friend.
Belle - "Don't Retreat - Reload"DX 10/07 Stage III Rectal
Surgery 11/07; 27 of 38 nodes
Perm Colostomy 8/11
12/10 recurrence lungs & LN's
VATS Jan 2011
Radiation Oct 2013
Chemo for Life
2012 Colondar Model

User avatar
Guinevere
Posts: 3358
Joined: Tue Oct 11, 2011 4:19 pm
Location: NE TX

Re: O/T ….

Postby Guinevere » Sun Jan 12, 2014 12:46 pm

Oh, CR, what a lovely and brilliant tribute to your dad. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I'll be praying for you and the family. You know we're here for you.

God bless ~
Guinevere
Hrt atk - Feb 11
CRC4 DX - Apr 11
APR liver rsct, procto - Jul 11
Folfox/Avastin - Sep 11
Xeliri - Nov 11
Iritux - Jun 12
Break - Jan - Mar 13
Iritux - Mar 13
Stivarga - Aug 13
Folfiri - Oct 13
Exhausted treatment options - May 14

JJ2212
Posts: 268
Joined: Mon Oct 14, 2013 3:54 pm
Location: Montréal, QC

Re: O/T ….

Postby JJ2212 » Sun Jan 12, 2014 1:25 pm

Beautiful CR. I wish you and your Dad peace and harmony.
Rectal cancer dx 04/13 @ 42, MSS, KRAS positive
T3N2M1 (1 lung met)
5 weeks xeloda+radiation finished 07/13
APR 9/13 (permanent colostomy), 27/31 nodes positive :-(
12 rounds of FOLFOX 04/14
Lung met growth 11/14
26 cycles Regorafenib (Stivarga) from 11/15 to 01/17
New lung met and chest/neck lymph nodes 01/17
1 cycle Folfiri


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