Postby Oneeyeddog » Thu May 09, 2013 4:35 am
I'm a newbie to all this. Post resection. T3N2M0. Chemo starts next week. Most of my friends have been lovely and, while sometimes not knowing quite what to say, have just been honest about it and said, they don't know what to say but they're thinking of me. That's enough for me, to know people are thinking of me. It doesn't matter whether it's a long e-mail or a text that just says, 'what's up dude."
I could write a book about the weird things people have said to me and I'm only 6 weeks after diagnosis. The most common refers to weight lost, or my favourite, "good job they caught it early" or "you'll be fine, if caught early, the cure rate is very high." Funny to me because 1) they didn't catch it early, although thankful it's not later. and 2) i think most people with cancer make themselves aware though docs, or the internet, what their chances are, so no need for people to tell you that.
of course, i shouldn't be Mr. Cancer Manners and i know it is an awkward situation for people and they do indeed mean well. i feel guilty for getting annoyed with people and am sure im just projecting my bad energies.
My favorite message though, after I posted about my cancer on Facebook, was from someone telling me 1) about a close friend they just lost to colon cancer 2) their own concern about their own rectum and whether he thought he should see a doctor (er, yeah) 3) morbid pseudo-spiritual reflections about the grand meaning of it all as if i had just announced i had terminal cancer. " It's the leaving the party first part of death that is the hardest part to take, I find" and then he ended with a flourish and an Eric Idle quote."you come from nothing, you go back to nothing and what have you lost? - nothing!"
Forget the cancer, after reading his message, I wanted to end it all myself there and then.
Sorry for the rant. It is a happy rant.
Positive thoughts to all,
OED
Colon cancer Stage 3c (dx April 2013) at age 36
Resection and temp ileostomy (4/17)
12 rounds of FOLFOX (May-Oct 2013)
NED (August 2014)
http://www.theoneeyeddog.com