mCRC STAGE IV OR RECURRENT PATIENTS thread - ONGOING

[Ashlee H.]

Since DX, I've slowly been giving stuff away. If someone had shown an interest in something over the years, I'd give it to them. I had a very good friend visit me, and I had her go through the jewelry she thought she'd enjoying wearing. Somedays I walk through the house and look at something, realized I had no attachment to it and put it in a bag for donation. On some items I have placed a friend's name on it. My car will go to a single mother who is raising two kids. I've told the person who will be my Trustee anything that can go to a good cause to donate it. CD's and DVD's can go to a senior center. So often people don't want your "stuff". I remember how disappointed my mom was that no one wanted her china when she was downsizing. No one wants pianos anymore. I realized things that are important to me are usually not important to others. My goal is to get my house extremely streamlined with no clutter. I remember traveling in Europe where people live in smaller houses and just have what they need - no clutter. The project I started this week was to start to go through files and start the paper shredding process. I have my shredder out, and whenever I pass it, I feed it a few documents. I also realize I have to give all my access codes to the soon to be Trustee so she can get into my accounts. I'm canceling magazines. As far as my clutter, I often ask myself, if my place burned down, what would I miss the most - those items I keep for now. The others are slowly getting moved out of the house -either with friends or the donation box. My chemo clothes are donated - just don't want to see them anymore. I'm not going to need any of these things as I transition to my new life. I had to clean out a friend's house who died of cancer. She did do the paper shredding, but there were still so much to go through. How many candles, kitchen towels, and owls does one person need? And walls and walls of books. No one wants books anymore unless they are a first edition. After our deaths, people will figure it out. If they fight about it...well, that is kind of normal...sad, but normal.

[michelle c]

I shouldn't be on this thread but just popped in.

Ashlee, I admire you so much for thinking of others like this. It just shows what a wonderful, thoughtful and caring person you are. You are going through so much yourself but you are thinking of others. You know what - Don't worry too much about the "clutter" - sorting things out is not much fun. Focus on doing things that you enjoy and leave the clutter to someone else. It seems like you have thought about the main things and what's important.

I need to get rid of some clutter - I think we all do If something happened to me tomorrow, people would probably say - "What did she keep this for?" Saying that, my house is kept pretty much clean and tidy. I don't like clutter but, at the same time, I do find it hard to throw things out at times even though I know I should. That's me I guess

[jeanette57]

Thanks Candy

I appreciate the thought. I started doing shredding for my paperwork. My tables are piled high but working to clear out boxes. I have kept each paycheck since 17, to see my future through jobs I took. I have been going through my savings as I was without income for almost 2 years. I really freaked when I just paid 745 for last infusion. However said, I feel super rich as I have faith. I just got a note from my lawyer that I am now eligible for Medicare. wow! Life is good.

Mom is something else. I am the general or the leader of the clan. I have always be the leader even as a small child. I had a strong sense of right and wrong and commanding present. I think the time the men wanted to watch football after thanksgiving, when I told them the women were going shopping and I wanted the dishes done. I told them to put on table, but if not don't right - they were going to redo it!. I took my aunts and mom shopping and when we came home, dishes were done, bright and clean and nothing broken. I think mom almost fainted! That sealed my future. They still talked abut the only time the men did dishes in their lives.

My mom's house and mine have joined backyards. I have a gate and fence but if she wants she can walk over on the sidewalk. I live one one street and she lives on the other street. It is great with the dogs and nice to have them well taken care of. I am going to have to try and sneak things out. It will be something crazy but I have asked a few friends to help, I get them bagged and they come and take to Salvation Army.

Cremation is for me. I know it cost 750 so have been putting that aside to get it paid. I was asking to illegal put me in small pipe and fit me under my parents in military cemetery but we may just sprinkle me near if when we move dad closer to us at new place that opens late 2014! This sure is an unbelievable journey - wondering HOW MUCH TIME DO I HAVE... then trying to get things done.

Thanks... sneaky wins!

[Guinevere]

I have Skype on my computer and I'll figure out how to use it before December. Sounds fun!

I've gotten in the habit as I am going through stores or looking at catalogues, "I'm decreasing, not increasing" over and over again so I'm not tempted to add to the stuff DH has to go through. That said, I found the cutest iron butterfly side table in a catalogue the other day and I think I'd really like it. My granddaughter can have when she's older as it has a glass top on it. We'll see...

My mom and sisters came up Friday and spent the night and we all went for Chinese food and to see the Princess yesterday. What a blessing it was to get to feed her, burp her, sing to her and let her know what a miracle she is! I'm really pooped today but it was worth it.

I'm stunned by the death of Debzak! I knew she was having a hard time and I hope I was able to help her some but I had no idea she was doing as badly as she was.

Just letting you guys know you're in my thoughts and prayers.

God bless ~
Gwen

[scattered edge]

I have been cleaning clutter and shredding papers too. I am a lousy bookkeeper and filer. My husband will go crazy if I don't clean some crap out. We live an hour from the city, I have been loading things into boxes and bags placing them by the back door and anytime we go to the city I take a load to the Salvation Army. As I've been loading things for the thrift store I load other boxes with things to go to the garbage. I go to get my auntie every morning to go to town for "coffee" and take a box of garbage. I think if it weren't for the coffee group I would turn into a hermit.

Debzak scared me. I wasn't not ready for that

Ashlee you always continue to inspire me

Rosie

[jeanette57]

I think it will take a few years to get the clutter finished Wish I had them, but I can see the decline. It has been interesting also the brain is forgetting so much. Oh well.

Tomorrow is the new chemo, will hope for the best. I had this wonderful week of rest, and so enjoyed it. Now if I can handle this chemo will think to the next bucket list going to the hot mineral spa on the 8th of March then our favorite St pattys watering hole. They make the best corn beef and cabbage. They have wild home brew but I get soft drinks free as I am the driver. (lucky it is only 2 miles from home).

Well, Here is to working on clutter and enjoying the wonderful warm spring weather. Heaven here!

[Mommato4boys]

I'm also down sizing and spending much less on material things. We are going on a spring break cruise. My mom gave us unexpected $ for Christmas. I know we could have used it for home improvements or college( oldest son is a senior), but I want to make family memories, my littlest just turned 9 today. I just hope I feel well In April. My biggest goal is to go thru all of our pictures, and give each son a photo box of pictures. I made a binder of bills, passwords and important things my husband needs to know about the kids, finances and funeral wishes. I'm so glad we have this forum to share our feelings.

[Mard1012]

Hi
I lurk but i think this is my first post. I'm stage IV and have liver mets. Surgeon said liver looked fine. CAT said liver is covered. Everything one Dr says someone else says the opposite. I just had #8 of FOLFOX6 today but they reduced the 5FU because of hand and foot syndrome. It's starting already hopefully not as bad.
I too have been giving stuff away and selling on eBay. Since we moved 2 1/2 years ago after being in the same house for 32 years, lots were thrown out, recycled, donated, or given away. But there is still stuff to go. I don't want to leave DH with a lot of stuff. He doesn't call me a hoarder but a collector! After watching the TV shows, I'm definitely not a hoarder!
So hello to everyone.
Martha

[jeanette57]

Just coming into steroid high so not sure this is fragmented. New chemo today. I am so happy, but the gas has been expected and not fun, Ostomy bags are not gas friendly.

I have been to chemo every week for 18 months so glad this new chemo allows for every two weeks. What a crazy day ... went to bank to get cash for treatment. Then got there and they tell me my insurance is in place and I don't owe a dime. Hum.... blessings are great but some time confusing.

Horder on TV are terrible. I mean dirty, dead animals and small area. My mom is not that! She just has lots of things but mostly cloths. At 90 she has outfits from the 40 till today. I made her get rid of lots of things as a teen - hated the mink coats - really freaked me out in the desert where they shredded and I swear cause massive nightmare. Now she wants all my outfits. No way. She can wear my dresses and tops but I to tall for the pants, but she took them and cut off the legs (uneven and sloppy)

Today at the cancer center she started to cry when everyone was going WOW over her jewelry (another collection) and realized what she said. When I (mom) dies I get them, hell no, I gave her the look and said I am going first. It hit home. she has no one to give her jewelry who care its from 100 of years of family. I am sure my brother would love to melt it down. Oh well, not my issue - I have to focas on me.

I have to write up a new beneficial deed - but have to find something called a typewriter (smile). The form is ready but have to get it verified and taken to court house. Hope this new chemo lets me have that week off in better energy and I can get more done.

[Guinevere]

Welcome, Martha! Hope you're up to posting more since you've already taken the first step.

The hand/foot really ramped up last night for some reason. Yesterday, I had a tiny crack on each foot. I woke up this morning to hurting feet and the sides and balls of my feet look like railroad tracks! I've used liquid bandage and super glue. If I wear socks and remember to wear my new,house shoes, they don't hurt that badly. If I forget... I told DH that it may that I walked more yesterday. I did lotion my feet before putting on my socks but that might not have been enough.

DH and I got to babysit the princess yesterday. I turned on the 70s jams and sang to her after she ate and burped. We had a fabulous time! Grandma almost went to sleep too! Our DIL has been having some uterine bleeding all of a sudden starting last Friday evening. Two hospitalizations which included 2 blood transfusions, antibiotics and pitosin and she's home and doing fine. However, I don't mind saying it all scared us.

I've been going through old software and DVD s and CDs I've made over the years. Good grief! What do you do with games and programs that you can no longer run??! I don't know...some, I 've thrown away but others like Myst & Riven and some photography software I can't seem to make myself get rid of. At least I'm still working on decreasing instead of increasing.

God bless ~
Gwen

[Candyys03]

Hi Martha! Welcome!

Jeanette,
I'm glad your insurance kicked in.

Bev,
How are you doing?

I had my 4yr old grand daughter, my joy, yesterday and she took a nap on my lap and I started dosing off too. Grand children are such a blessing.

Well, I have finally used up all of my signature. Have figure out how to edit/shorten it more.

Candy

[jeanette57]

New chemo really did a job on the bladder, up 7 times. Yicks I am happy to lose the water weight I got from hospital stay so not complaining. I did feel bad but took my dogs bed away from my place in the living room, she wanted to crawl in bed with me, but no! I was afraid I would trip over the bed in my rush to restroom. That hospital bed is small. I then but all in my old bedroom and made her stay there. She has to get extra treats today.

I don't know what it would be called anywhere or if they operate outside AZ. World Care - they send old computers and CD and any type of educational material to 3rd world countries. They are the only place you can take your medications to send overseas. Those 250 buck drugs that nearly killed me were given. I gave them 100 pds of text books,
They have some supplies for local teachers and many do community work there. They also back Red Cross with stuff.

wild blessings were extended to again! I sure am confused but happy, confused again. I went to bank took money out to pay for treatment. Got there and by blessing magic, my insurance is in place I don't have to pay a penny. Wow! I am surprised, no one email, phone or notified me I got it back. So keeping my prayer and hoping the next year is covered.
I also have to hide the cash - but going to see about more imported meals (Chinese delivery - yum). Ok, need to eat, getting tummy rumbles...

[Guinevere]

Jeanette, my old chemo brain read, "I'm going to look into more imported meds (Chinese, YUM!)" and thought, "Why in the world would she like Chinese meds??!" Then, I reread the sentence and it made a whole lot more sense!

DH and I enjoyed his weekend off. We didn't get to see the princess. She was out and about with her mama. I was glad the DIL was feeling up to being out. We'll, hopefully, get to see her on Tuesday - chemo day. It'll be my last one for at least a month. I'm really ready to take a break. The fatigue is just debilitating now.

The weather here has been gorgeous. Yesterday was in the low 70s. I know,we'll have at least one more bad cold front before spring springs but it was nice to be out and about for a while yesterday even if I'm not up to doing much.

God bless ~
Gwen

[jeanette57]

Great - no Chinese meds for me, just food. I love Chinese food.

I have been so tired with the new chemo about not sure what happened. I am having bladder issues, so either I got a bladder infection or chemo is effecting bladder. I almost don't make it to thrown. The yesterday the GI blues became scary. So today went to mom's watched a little Sochie stuff and made myself a drink. Been a long time but it is a dr pepper-jaggermiester drink. Yum/

Now buzzed so going to bed! Sweet dreams and heater blasting as I am cold at 70's/ need the 90's for a warm night sleep.

[Candyys03]

Gwen try acupuncture. I haven't but those that do say it helps for the pain.
Candy