I've gone on Hospice

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Yellowbird
Posts: 143
Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 10:00 pm
Facebook Username: Laura Yarbrough Abbott
Location: Texas

I've gone on Hospice

Postby Yellowbird » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:30 pm

I made the decision Monday to go on hospice. The ct of my head didn't show any "ABBY NORMAL' stuff but the CT of my chest has been delayed for some reason. The nurse who has been following my journey all along, who knows me well, suggested it was time, after seeing the CT of my abdomen and pelvis.

I am incredibly short of breath...have developed a serious strange cough...and I'm oh so tired.

My faith in God is leading me to really turn my life over to Him and place my life, literally, in His hands. You can call me a fool if you'd like. Its common knowledge that any further chemo will not cure me and no one has told me if it will extend my life for even a day.

But for me, chemo steals my joy, my peace, and changes me into a person I do not like. If my days/weeks/months here are few, than I want that time to be at peace.

Blessings to all my CC warriors in their continued fight.
Dx stage III July '10
Colon resection August '10
8 rounds Folfox
dx stage IV peritoneal carcinoma May 11
HIPEC Aug 11
Mop up folfiri with avastin
July 12, liver mets multiple metastases

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raym
Posts: 1263
Joined: Sat Apr 16, 2011 11:08 am
Location: South Central PA

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby raym » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:35 pm

so sorry to read this :( wishing you peace and comfort and prayers
3/11 IIIC +/FOLFOX
4/12 HIPEC
6/12 Chmo/Rad
9/12 XELIRI+Avast/Zltra
9/13 Plvic Absc,stpd chemo
11/13 Tumr rmvd frm Lap Port incis
12/13 Xeloda
1/14 Cardiac Issue no Xeloda/5FU
3/14 Irinotecan
6/14 Stopped chemo
8/14 Clin Trial
9/14 Infectn - Stpd Trial

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Yellowbird
Posts: 143
Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 10:00 pm
Facebook Username: Laura Yarbrough Abbott
Location: Texas

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby Yellowbird » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:39 pm

Thank you Ray. Please keep on fighting.

And please keep spreading the word about Cytoreduction with HIPEC. Dr. Sardi is a angel here on Earth.
Dx stage III July '10
Colon resection August '10
8 rounds Folfox
dx stage IV peritoneal carcinoma May 11
HIPEC Aug 11
Mop up folfiri with avastin
July 12, liver mets multiple metastases

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WorriedWife
Posts: 1125
Joined: Tue Jul 24, 2012 5:41 pm

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby WorriedWife » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:46 pm

Dear Yellowbird,

I am so sorry you are not doing well :( I am sending you tons of prayers. I am wishing you many peaceful days ahead to enjoy your family and friends.
Hubby
CC Stg. 2b
Dx 6/12
surgery & reconnect
opted out Folfox
Pet Scan Aug NED
abscess/fistula for over a year
ongoing Dec 2013
Praying for each and every one of you

NWgirl
Posts: 6659
Joined: Sat Feb 02, 2008 3:24 am
Facebook Username: Belle Piazza
Location: Battle Ground, Washington

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby NWgirl » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:50 pm

I hope that whatever time you have left, long or short, is peaceful.
Belle - "Don't Retreat - Reload"DX 10/07 Stage III Rectal
Surgery 11/07; 27 of 38 nodes
Perm Colostomy 8/11
12/10 recurrence lungs & LN's
VATS Jan 2011
Radiation Oct 2013
Chemo for Life
2012 Colondar Model

Sassyplantgirl
Posts: 14
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2012 9:20 pm

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby Sassyplantgirl » Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:50 pm

I keep telling myself that when I'm ready and had enough, I will know and make that choice in peace.

Enjoy every minute, you have fought and battled and you are making this choice in peace and leaving it in HIS hands.

No one is here to judge...I just wish this terrible disease did not exist. My brothers last few weeks and days were some of he best we had with him.

Leave nothing left unsaid and my continued thoughts and prayers will be with you.

Cody
Stage 3 colon cancer 11/11
Folfox
Lynch syndrome
Hysterectomy 12/12
Stage 4 mets to ovaries 12/12
Folfiri & Avastin 1/23/13
CEA rise-new tumor-abdominal wall surgery 10/13
Folfiri & avastin 12/13
Radiation 6/14
Hospice 10/14
Screw you cancer
Clinical Trail Nivolumab 2/15-?

janklo
Posts: 1567
Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2010 11:10 pm
Facebook Username: JanetKlostermann

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby janklo » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:10 am

You are making the right decision for you. I know you will now be pain free and can enjoy life again. Wishing you the best times doing what you want!
Mom to 28 yo daughter
colectomy 2/22/10, stage 3C, signet cell
7/2011 peritoneal mets
HIPEC September 2012, difficult recovery
Hospice 10/31/2012, Died 11/16/2012

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Rob in PA
Posts: 2022
Joined: Wed Dec 09, 2009 9:16 pm
Location: Pennsylvania

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby Rob in PA » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:11 am

Peaceful journey yellowbird...peaceful journey. Prayers are with you.
Rob
dx 11/07 crc IIIb @ 39
Xelox/Rad/ temp colostomy
LAR/J-pouch/ temp ileo
Folfox-8
Failed reversal
2/09 liver mets; liver resect/ileo reversal
Folfiri/Avastin - 12
2/11 5 lung mets
Folfiri/Avastin 2011
SBRT 3/12
Lung met 5/13/ said NO to more chemo
SBRT 8/13
2 lung mets 5/14, VATS 8/14, NED

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Ashlee H.
Posts: 2435
Joined: Fri Oct 09, 2009 11:50 pm
Location: Southern California

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby Ashlee H. » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:11 am

I was so sad to see your post tonight. But I understand how you feel. I've always posted when the joy is gone, so is the chemo. I will not die with chemo in my veins. I'm glad you have Faith. I know God is with me every step of the way, and He will be with me at the end, as He will be with you.. I've gotten so I'm so looking forward to seeing Heaven. I was privileged enough to communicate with Tim Hood who made the decision last year to stop treatment - and he had a pretty good last year. As someone recently mentioned, you are just finishing your race, not losing the battle.
You are a brave, wonderful woman and have been so encouraging to others, especially in regards to HIPEC. We will be here for you. Peace to you Yellowbird.
Stage IV w/liver met dx 7-1-09
KRAS Mutant
Member of the HIPECKERS (2011) and OLYMPHIANS (2012)
2/14 - standard chemo has stopped working
3/14 - Stivarga
LIVE LIFE!

so-scared
Posts: 1059
Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2011 12:53 pm

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby so-scared » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:15 am

I wish you peace, tender moments, and love.

DeAnn
DH 51 yo
dx 5/16/11 stg 4 RC
mets both lobes liver & lung
6/11 chem/rad
FOLFOX 9-12/11
12/11 TME/liver resect/rfa (15 tumors)
more Folfox w/Avastin
5/12 innumerable mets liver
Folfox/Avas FAIL
9/12 FOLFIRI/Erb FAIL
HAI pump 12/12
Had to leave 5/23/14

skypup
Posts: 2598
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2012 12:12 pm

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby skypup » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:16 am

Yellowbird wrote:My faith in God is leading me to really turn my life over to Him and place my life, literally, in His hands. You can call me a fool if you'd like. Its common knowledge that any further chemo will not cure me and no one has told me if it will extend my life for even a day.


It's been shown that continuing chemo too long shortens life and adversely affects quality of life. You are in my prayers. I feel so lucky to know you and to have shared our journeys. Your spirit shines through.

May you have peace and comfort and beautiful time with your family and dog and friends.

Gentle, soft, long hug,
Theresa

michelle c
Posts: 1929
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2009 3:58 am

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby michelle c » Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:57 am

Your faith sounds like it give you incredible comfort and peace. May this continue for you. I can understand completely regarding the chemo. Know that we are always here for you.

God bless,

Love and hugs,

Michelle
May 25 2009 Dx with CC (sigmoid colon) 2 days after my 44th b'day
CEA prior to surgery 4.7
Jun 3 2009 LAR - Stage III 3/10 lymph nodes
Jul 6 - Dec 10 2009 - 12 cycles FOLFIRI
Genetic testing - inconclusive for Lynch
Jul 2012 port removed & hernia repair

DaniMags
Posts: 105
Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 2:10 pm
Facebook Username: Dani Johnson Magnuson
Location: Lehigh Valley, PA

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby DaniMags » Sat Feb 02, 2013 1:31 am

I must say I have and still do admire your strength. You have been open with us throughout your journey which was of extreme help to me and, I'm sure, countless others.

You fought hard, Yellowbird. I will say prayers for you to have peace and comfort ahead.

Dani
DX 12/09 St IIIC
1/10-6/10 FOLFOX
9/11 mets omentum/abd; 10/11 FOLFOX/Erb
1/12 Alimta/Herc
3/12 mets to liver -FOLFOX/Erb
5/12 FOLFIRI/Erb
8/12 FOLFIRI/Avastin, 1/13-Temodar/Avastin
3/13 widespread progr inc. lungs
4/13 - Stivarga (failed)

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Yellowbird
Posts: 143
Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 10:00 pm
Facebook Username: Laura Yarbrough Abbott
Location: Texas

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby Yellowbird » Sat Feb 02, 2013 1:35 am

If you would all like to connect with me on another level...you can find, and friend me on Facebook under Laura Yarbrough Abbott.

Blessings....
Dx stage III July '10
Colon resection August '10
8 rounds Folfox
dx stage IV peritoneal carcinoma May 11
HIPEC Aug 11
Mop up folfiri with avastin
July 12, liver mets multiple metastases

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CRguy
Posts: 10473
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:00 pm

Re: I've gone on Hospice

Postby CRguy » Sat Feb 02, 2013 2:08 am

Sending prayers and peace with you on the Journey.
In Harmony
CRguy
Caregiver x 4
Stage IV A rectal cancer/lung met
17 Year survivor
my life is an ongoing totally randomized UNcontrolled experiment with N=1 !
Review of my Journey so far


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