I CUT MY FINGER... because of this cancer .... terrible pain

[Fede]

Hi everyboday

I have a terrible prolbme, imagine with one less finger what my gramatic awful and my poorr rethoric english , my teacher will not be happy... indcredible I cut my finger while I was preapearing my pizza (tipical from Italian family Sunday nithghts) now my notebook making cheering with my red blood over my band...the smartt doc ask me about what hhhapened, and I asked him, well dok i was cuting the cheese for my pizzsa and suddlendly the knife putttttttttttttttttttt it cut my fingerr a lot of bllood , fortunately it was red, but dok had to calm me down... now I am not wrriting well, so so sad not sure what i have to stop my blood and terrible pain...it is all due to the f....cancer because of I was thinking in it... my far cousin was all evening asking me about cancer... and it destrryoed my little mind... now I will be in this mode for some days, so I will try to write in the best mmanner I can... I hope everything pray for me because this s...t.. disease is destroying my poor life and now my finger
So so sad... fortunately my co-reserarcher and friend Frances suggested me to go to the hospital for 1 point... mmmm hate it...

A big kiss for everthbody and sorry if somebody can not read me for siome diays.

Fede

[justin case]

Actually, I cut off 3 of my fingers, while die cutting the blue piece of plastic, that was intended to go under Philadelphia Cream Cheese. Whoops The worst thing that ever happenned to me , until I got cancer
Regards,
Michael

[mackswife]

Fede, I am so sorry that this has happened to you! Cancer is such a distraction in our lives...I have to remind myself to focus when I'm driving, because if I start thinking about the details of what we call "THE CANCER PROJECT", my mind just wanders. It's hard to keep ourselves safe that way. I will be praying that your wound heals quickly. Pattie

[Ashlee H.]

I'd be happy with a cut finger. Cancer took from me- a foot and a half of my colon, my appendix, my spleen, my omentum, my hair, my skin, my teeth, my eyesight, my energy, my vacations, my normal life, etc. Cancer gave me horrible scars up and down my belly. Blood? Yup, have had a few transfusions.
I was in a car accident where I had to have foot reconstruction and a lot of physical therapy.....should I blame that on cancer? Accidents happen. Broken bones and cuts happen.
I found it upsetting you blamed cancer for this mishap. Sometimes we ourselves are to blame for our pain - I think a cut finger falls into that category.
Fede, I'm sorry you cut yourself and bled all over your pizza. But to say it was because of cancer....really?
Many of us deal with horrible pain everyday because of cancer.
I'd trade places with you any day....my cancer issues for your finger issue.
Trust me, you will live with a cut finger. At the worse, you may have to get some antibiotics and stitches - much better than chemo and surgery.

Fede - I would not have had a reaction to your posting if you just wanted to share the injury - you cut your finger real bad - there was blood all over - and you were in pain. But when you blamed cancer for it, that is when the emotions got involved. I will die from cancer. You will not die from your injury.

[SkiFletch]

Kitchen injuries suck Fede, especially when they involve finger tips. Keep the wound clean and hope it heals fast for you.

[hannahw]

Cancer doesn't just want to kill people, it also wants to take quality of life from patients, family, friends, etc. If you really feel like cancer is to blame for this incident, I'd suggest you take a step back and ask yourself whether you're giving the cancer too much of yourself. It's one thing to want to find new ways of defeating cancer, it's another to allow cancer to consume you to the point where it runs your life and you blame it for everything that happens to you. You're the captain of your own ship. If you don't like the direction you're headed, set a new course. Don't let the cancer dictate your path. It really doesn't deserve the power you're letting it have.

Also, from a perspective standpoint, while slicing your finger surely sucks, the thing that comes to my mind when you choose to post about it is: first world problem that many people would gladly trade for. I realize that it's not a competition and your stress doesn't come entirely from cutting your finger, but rather from the cumulative effect of all the pressure you're under from taking care of your dad, but as with many of your posts I really worry that you're not too far from going off the deep end. I hope you'll consider getting some help to deal with your emotions.

[michelle c]

Sorry you cut your finger, Fede. I do this all the time - and always seem to burn myself too when I'm cooking I have a burn on the tip of my finger now that I can feel whilst typing.

You sound very upset by it and this concerns me - try and relax - don't let the cancer win and get to you like this!

Hope you were able to enjoy your pizza!

[vickitwo]

Hoping that your finger heals fast.

[Bev G]

Cancer doesn't just want to kill people, it also wants to take quality of life from patients, family, friends, etc. If you really feel like cancer is to blame for this incident, I'd suggest you take a step back and ask yourself whether you're giving the cancer too much of yourself. It's one thing to want to find new ways of defeating cancer, it's another to allow cancer to consume you to the point where it runs your life and you blame it for everything that happens to you. You're the captain of your own ship. If you don't like the direction you're headed, set a new course. Don't let the cancer dictate your path. It really doesn't deserve the power you're letting it have.

Also, from a perspective standpoint, while slicing your finger surely sucks, the thing that comes to my mind when you choose to post about it is: first world problem that many people would gladly trade for. I realize that it's not a competition and your stress doesn't come entirely from cutting your finger, but rather from the cumulative effect of all the pressure you're under from taking care of your dad, but as with many of your posts I really worry that you're not too far from going off the deep end. I hope you'll consider getting some help to deal with your emotions.

Yes.I am very concerned for YOU, Fede. Your finger will heal, and I suspect soon, but will YOU? i care so much about you!

[BrownBagger]

Actually, I cut off 3 of my fingers, while die cutting the blue piece of plastic, that was intended to go under Philadelphia Cream Cheese. Whoops The worst thing that ever happenned to me , until I got cancer
Regards,
Michael

I agree. Actually having cancer really sucks.

[Laurettas]

Yes, Fede, you are right, cancer does take a toll on us even when we are not the ones with it. The circle of people that have been affected by Jake's illness and death is huge. And, we are still affected in very real ways in our every day lives. I know that my brain in not functioning as well as it should so I need to be extra careful when driving and doing other dangerous things. I have to limit the amount of stress that I take on right not because I know I have been on overload for a year and a half and it wouldn't take much to put me over the edge.

And it's not just me. Our daughter is affected very much, her children, Jake's siblings, mother, other family members. And they weren't even involved in his caregiving. One counselor friend of Jake's sister told her that it would take at least 6 months to a year for her brain to begin functioning normally again. I figure if she, who wasn't even involved in the day to day affairs and whose life was not dramatically changed will be affected that long, it must be at least 5 years for me!!!

So, yea, I can sympathize, cancer is tough on everyone and in many, many ways that we don't even realize at the time. Hope the finger heals quickly and it will be a gentle reminder for you to take care of yourself, too. A kiss for you!

[Nellie]

I could probably cut my fingers quite easily - due to the neuropathy, due to the chemo, due to my stage IV cancer ......

[Rob in PA]

I ruined my daughters favorite pair of fuzzy pajama bottoms because I didn't set the washer on "cold/delicates". Dang, guess it was my cancer. C'mon Fede, put yourself in some of our shoes....let the anger go. I don't think your Father would want to know how much angst his disease is causing you.

and, sorry you cut your finger. Hope it didn't ruin your pizza.

Here's hoping for a better day for you.

Rob

[alanams]

Good afternoon Fede,

I'm sorry you had that mishap. Sometimes, these negative happenings come one after another, and you have no choice but to be philosophical. Try not to think too much about what cannot be changed.

Just enjoy your pizza, and other of life's simple pleaseures.

Get better soon1

Regards, Alan

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
50 yr old M, metastatic adenocarcinoma of colon
colon bypass surgery performed 7/2012
PT/CT scans showed tumor cells in liver, lungs and lymph nodes
Fulfox started 9/10/2012, Fulfox and Avastin administered subsequently
CT Scan after 6 infusions, splenic enlargement, some decrease in size of liver and lung tumors.
Spenic infarct present; Avastin discontinued.

[hannahw]

One day your Dad is going to die, as all Dad's eventually do. How do you want to spend whatever time you have remaining with him? Under constant stress, hating so many things and so many people? Sharing experiences with your Dad that will bring you both joy and lasting memories? These two things are not mutually exclusive, but I've found in my own experience that there is a finite amount of energy available to me. Some of it I spend on research and advocacy. But a lot of it I spend on enjoying the time I have with family and friends. It's important to have some balance.

There may not be a way to quantify the value of happiness on health, but there seems to be significant evidence that demonstrates high degrees of stress and anxiety do not help, and probably harm, your health. My Dad can sense my stress and it troubles him. The last thing he wants is to feel like his children are being destroyed by his cancer. Me being anxious does him no favors. I'd much rather contribute to his happiness than to his distress. Think about the way you're spending your own energy and also what sort of energy you're returning to the world around you. You do have choices. It doesn't have to be all rage and blame and frustration all the time.