Thanks for all your input. I really appreciate it.
I feel like I live a life of constant contradiction; one day good, one day bad, one day happy, one day sad. One day he feels like his days are limited, the next he acts like nothings wrong. Sometimes I think our friends think I'm a dramatic - but, they only see us on "good
Blake saw the Palliative doc yesterday & we spoke about Hospice transition. She feels that if he's able to get his pain under control, he'll improve substantially so she increased the pain patch to 100 mg. She doesn't feel like it's "time" although felt that things were odd during her neurological exam so she's ordered a brain MRI. IF something shows up, it will explain a lot.
He also had chemo yesterday. His Neutrophils were low (1.3) but the Doc said "If Blake wants it, give it to him." Last night, he was about to pass out - was white as a ghost. I was able to get him into bed; he slept for a bit & then was up most of the night on a steroid high. Today? He's at work. This guy won't give up which I absolutely admire but it also scares me. The 'what if's'
just drive you nuts don't they?
Again, thanks friends. Sorry I've been absent lately - I read daily and care deeply.