those who have made through treatment, need advice

[jeanette57]

Well Group
Made through week 3 for 5fu/24x5 and 180 radiations five days. I am doing ok, got a nasty radiation burn on my tail bone and to wait until this weekend to smear Baby Butt Paste, followed by Destiny extreme followed by some really heavy stuff out of Germany. I am doing ok.
Now most of my family and most of my friends want me to put my old dogs down (two chinese crested 14 yrs/13yrs) and my friend (wants my crazy cat for good) She feels that I am not well enough to take care of this kitten/cat. I never had a cat so trained her like a dog, fetches for hours (have to hide her ball), I pet her like a dog, walks on a leash, lets me cut her nails, opens her mouth when I ask so I can pop a pill or goodie if I need to. She loves to shower with me (that I do not like)., Ok, she is a love bug but she now has to stay outside in a 10x20 cattery. She loves to play hard and can give me something called "cat scratch fever, and she loves the darn long hose that follows me around in my chemo pump. Nurse said I would die if she bite through it and allowed her spit to go to my heart area. Hum.
My great friend has 2 dogs with her (me) she came to live with me for 4 weeks while I go thought this stuff. Nice hubby to let her come.
I sent her out dancing, I am here with cat trying to decide about killing my dogs, and adopting my cat out. I am not sure what the future holds, so trying to do what- sleepless and sick to my tummy (oh that was the pie they brought me). My cancer food is all wild things people are bringing me. I haven't cook since Jan. Neighbor doing juice veggies (some really wild tastes) but guess I am blessed. I do like the pies, cakes, cookies, pastas etc. Smile.
Jeanette57

[CRguy]

First : I am a veterinarian of 30 + years.
Second : what do YOU feel about all this ; not your family, friends and nurses ....YOU ?
Third : with regards to your "nurse" and the cat scratch thing...??? have you ever become sick from this cat in the past ?
Fourth : why should old dogs be put down because you are sick....sounds to me like they give YOU joy in your life...???

Great if your true friends will actually help YOU in caring for your beloved pets if that is what you decide you need to do.
NOT good if others are trying to impose their will on you for what they think you need.

If someone tried to take away my pets..... they would be found in a heap outside my door the next morning...not the pets...the people.
Just my opinion.
PM me if you want to talk offline
CRguy

[weisssoccermom]

Jeanette,
I also have a question....WHY should you put your dogs down??? Another question....do you have any idea what that entails and/or how it affects you???

When I was dxd, my cocker mix (Precious) was 16 and my beagle (KC) was 14 ....by most vets standards....old babies....but dang did those furbabies give me unconditional love and attention when I needed it most. I also had Lesley (beagle - aged 5) and Roxy (beagle age 2). I didn't consider ANY of them old and absolutely loved the fact that they also needed ME...yep, needed me. Most of us want to feel normal....we want to try our best to do the things in life that we were accustomed to. Did getting dxd with cancer mean we were somehow overnight incapable of taking care of ourselves or our lives?? I needed my furbabies...all four of them....just as much as they needed me. They were there to shower me with kisses, to be there at my side, protecting me when I napped. The fact that they needed to be fed and played with were great distractions for me as well. It forced me to get up, to get their dishes and go through the motions of being their provider.

I think you'll find most of us have never once regretted the dogs, cats, and other distractions that we have/had in our lives. They give us a sense of purpose....a reason for getting through each day and honestly looking forward to the next day.

Jeanette, you have to live YOUR life. You can get through this and you have to do it YOUR way...not the way others think you should. Don't let others dictate to you how you should feel or make you feel that somehow because you have cancer that you can't deal with other things in your life that give you pleasure. I seriously doubt you would have the two dogs and cat if you truly didn't love them. Why should you give them up because you have cancer? While I'm sure your family/friends are well meaning, they truly aren't doing you any favors by implying that you're going to be some sort of an invalid or can't take care of things because you've been dxd with cancer. You're just beginning this journey and you'll need all the love and help you can get....and trust me, those animals will HELP you by putting a smile on your face.

I agree with Crguy....if someone told me that I should get rid of my furbabies....well, those people would be toast....not my girls. Unfortunately, my two older girls have passed away (Precious and KC are gone) but I will always remember how they slept with me or besides me, how their 'happy dances' brought a smile to my face and how they were the ones who stayed by my side at night and comforted me as I cried in fear. When I was scared and didn't want my kids/husband to know, my furbabies were the ones that I cuddled with and held as I cried. Your pets are oftentimes the ones who are more astute about what you're feeling and are the ones who really 'get it'. Don't deny yourself the opportunity to have those wonderful creatures be there with you and helping you as you get through the next phases of your treatments.

[so-scared]

I am a caregiver not a patient. My husband has stage IV rectal cancer and was diagnosed last May. At the time we had two Samoyed dogs, Beauty and Snowball. My Beauty was especially helpful to me during those first dark days. To just lay and be comforted by the only animal on the planet that loves you more than itself was very therapeutic. Unfortunately, we lost our male, Snowball, in Sept and our female, Beauty, in October. They were both old and I miss them dearly! I really needed them and so wish I still had them to comfort me. My husband showed up with a 7 week old Chow Chow puppy as a surprise for me about 6 weeks ago. When he walked in with this little ball of black fur I thought he had lost his mind! The timing is not great with all that we are dealing with. Bad timing or not, I am in love with my new little man and he brings us a lot of love and joy. I believe this is very helpful to our whole family (we have four boys). So, in my opinion, unless your dogs are failing and suffering you should snuggle up with them and let them help you through what lies ahead.

As far as cats go, we have two of them also. Rupert is very mellow and just not a problem in any way. Houdini, on the other hand, is the cat from hell at times. This is said with love. He is an absolutely beautiful long haired cat with a personality like no other. He is one of the coolest cats ever. We have been concerned about him biting through the chemo line too. This has not happened though. DH makes sure the line is tucked into the pack with the smallest amount necessary out to avoid a problem. At night we make sure the plastic closure thing is tucked away as that is what is so tempting to him. We have not had a problem. We have not been told that if he bites through it it could kill DH.

I guess the bottom line is that this is your decision and yours alone. Please do not let others sway you as you may have a very hard time later. These are your pets and no one feels the way you do about them. I wish you the very best!

So-s

[RayGirl]

To some people a dog is a just an animal, to others a dog is part of the family. If your pets are family, which is what you seem to imply, why prematurely part from them? Which group are the people making you decide in? Have you asked a trusted veterinarian's opinion if there are health concerns for the older dogs?

Now I know when my pets have neared their final days I have had to rely on my husband's opinion on when their quality of life had diminished to the point it was neccesary to make that decision. Yea he is a vet, but since he grew up raising farm animals; he tends to fall more in that other group that I don't understand. I know he is super sensitive to my feelings and he doesn't ask the question until he really feels it is time. Looking back both times, I know he procrastinated asking me much longer than he would any client (then again he can monitor ours much more frequently) I definitely would have a hard time making the call if I didn't trust his opinion completely.

On a side note I too had a cat that loved water. I really hate it when he'd jump into a bubble bath!!! I had to lock him out but otherwise he would open the closed door.

[Terry]

Reading that just breaks my heart Are your dogs sick? If not why should you put them down? Is your friend willing to just take temporary care of your cat? This HAS to be something your comfortable with and not just because you feel forced into it. Please, please give this some consideration, my babies (2 chihuahuas, yellow lab and mut that passed recently) actually helped me to get through all of this.

I pray for strength for your decision.

Terry

[disco nap]

One thing about chemo and cancer: it really skews your decision making because you are run down and emotional.

I made a lot of weird decisions on chemo, most minor but now I look back thinking...hmmm why on EARTH did I do that?

So, my advice is to delay any decisions of that magnitude for awhile. I'm not going to give you any advice but to wait.

[BrownBagger]

One important thing I've learned about dealing with this disease is that while it's important and often helpful to plan ahead, it's not helpful to over-react or rely too much upon the advice or experience of others. Some people, like me, are able to lead pretty normal lives though treatment, etc. Others find their lives turned upside down and find they have to make dramatic adjustments to be able to continue. You could be at either extreme or somewhere in between.

Euthanizing or otherwise disposing of your pets seems like an over-reaction to me, at this point. Sure, make plans for them if it turns out you can no longer provide the care they need--by all means--but don't assume that's going to happen. It may well not come to pass, and as others have suggested, you might get great benefit from your pets during treatment and recovery.

So, be prepared, but take it one step at a time. Try not to get ahead of yourself. It's a long journey, and one that you're going to have to learn to adapt to, one way or another.

Good luck!

[jennyjojjr]

Wow, this sounds just crazy. I have 8 cats and no one suggested I get rid of them. None of them tried to bite my tube, but if they did I would have just clamped the tubing shut, thereby stopping the infusion. Everyone has an opinion of course, but I think this is ridiculous.

[Lee]

We already had 2 cats and adopted a 3rd one while I was on chemo. I never had a problem. If there is a concern, is it possible to keep the cats confined to a special room on those days you are on chemo?

Lee

[jeanette57]

iAM BACK- 7 weeks chemo/radiation done- listened to all of you- dogs and cat are great! I just played it day by day! I am on bed rest for one fully week because IV infusion so cold hammered my heart! Heart spasms from hell! Now 7 weeks healing then surgery! My babies are so happy and animal loving friends jumped in - over feed and brushed- fat and happy!

[weisssoccermom]

Glad to hear that everything worked out ok. You'll learn that with this 'journey' it truly is a 'one day at a time' mentality. You'll fine that by two weeks from now you should be doing so much better!! Just in time for spring, too.

Enjoy those furbabies. They'll give you so much love and attention....something you don't want to try and live without.

Jaynee

[Lee]

Glad to hear you made it through chemo/radiation. And that your babies are still with you.

Furbabies are AWESOME!! They will have you feeling better in no time.

Lee

[jeanette57]

ha ha no fur on my dogs - hairless Xolo - PIO's and chinese crested--google -60 pds pio/xolo.

[esk2poo]

Way to goo!
My dog sort of diagnosed me. 12 YO lasapoo. Before diagnosis, he would not leave me alone. A real pain in the arse. He was always under my feet/chair where I was sitting and would bark like mad if I left the house. He does not do this to my wife or kids. I also go to bed early and he goes right to bed with me. He has been b me ever since and scares me sometimes. He looks at me and I actually ask him if there is stil something wrong, like he knows before scans or tests. I know they are training dogs to smell lung cancer.
Good luck and God bless.
Allen