so my surgery date got moved back and no one told me

[KellyW]

I showed up at 8:30 this morning for my pre-op appointment for my resection scheduled Feb 22nd and my surgery date got moved back to March 7th and no one told me.

seriously??? The scheduler told me a crisis had come up and things got moved and she forgot to call me. She was in tears b/c she felt so bad but I said, "You can't just tell someone 'you have cancer, now sit tight for a month and then we'll tell you if its bad or not".

You can see from my siggy- I had a cancerous polyp and the cancer was growing down the stalk and was 3mm from the resection site- so things look good for me.. but still. Isn't time rather important here???? Plans have been made- work arrangements made by my husband and my Dad. My mom is comin gpu and then my aunt and then my mother in law.

I just felt like this was the last check in the box before my surgery date. I'm just trying to make it through each day during this period of not knowing what I"m dealing with.

The surgeon will be in later today and the scheduler said she will talk with her about moving things back up again and will me. I just don't get it.... My dad said to get a new surgeon but by the time appointments are made and all of that jazz it will likely be the same time frame.

I am just stunned.

[NWgirl]

I'd definitely talk to the surgeon about this. It's possible the scheduler made the call (meaning she decided to rearrange the schedule) based on this 'emergency' but the surgeon may have his/her own thoughts on where your surgery falls in the priority dept.

I know my surgery was squeezed in late in the day (not an ideal time I know) - tacked on after what normally would have been my surgeon's last surgery. But when she saw my file and knew what was happening, she didn't want to waste a day - so she got me right in.

I don't blame you for being upset and I think it was good you spoke up. You definitely have to be your own advocate and communicate what you're feeling to your doctors/staff.

[KellyW]

rescheduled for Feb 29th, so one week later than originally planned. clinically its likely fine. emotionally? harder....

seems lame, but next week was perfect b/c it was the kids' school vacation and it was going to be easier on them as well as my husband and my Mom. I know that's a little thing, but having my routine has been good too- vacation means no routine and that's harder.

[esk2poo]

Kelly,
I know the waiting is the hardest part sometimes. It is also probably not growing fast enough where an extra week will do any harm. This situation realy stinks but just enjoy the week vacation now that you will have with your kids per surgery. Time really is so precious and so is family. Just try to enjoy them. My whole outlook on life has realy changed over the last couple of months and some things are more important and time is too short to really worry about things we cannot control.
Good luck.
Allen

[eitter]

Welcome to the CRAZY world of Cancer, this may not be the first goof up and there are several lessons from this.

First this is NOT your doctors fault, what you HAVE TO DO, is call the Office Manager and explain what happened, they need to know!

Second, DO NOT STRESS out about this, that is not what you need right now!

And lastly....actually routine would be good for you kids, maybe take off the day of your surgery, but then your kids can go to school and be in their routine rather then be home worrying about you all day. Of course this is my very humble opinion!

[KimT]

That's really frustrating and I would call the office manager so they can be aware. That is really inconsiderate.

One week or even a few weeks isn't going to make a difference in the grand scheme of things. Colon cancer is generally a very slow growing cancer. My first surgery got pushed back for maintenance on the pet scan machine. I was in a study at Ohio State. I could have gone ahead and foregone the study but I wanted the extra pet scans (at no charge to me) I understand the frustration though, you really can't rest easy knowing that cancer is inside of you. Waiting to do something, anything is hard. When we flew back from thailand, I had to wait two weeks to even see a surgeon and two more weeks later for surgery. I was anxious to get the ball rolling.

Ds was out of school for the first surgery and I scheduled my second resection on a Monday during a school week for him. He actually did better going to school and doing normal things. He wasn't as nervous and scared for me. He went to school every day, my maid would pick him up, get his homework done and shower him before bringing him to see me at the hospital. He hung out with me until dinner time and he would go home with dh. He was really scared for me the first time but much more settled the second. I think doing the normal daily things was good for him. I'm glad to hear your family is going to be around so you can rest and recover.

[NWgirl]

Okay, so one week later; better than what they originally set out with the March date. I have the same opinion as Liz as far as the kids go. Enjoy their time off from school. Do something fun!

From my own personal experience (my kids had just turned 5 & 7 when I had my first big surgery); I found school to be very helpful in keeping the kids on schedule and giving them some sense of normalcy in their lives. I was in the hospital almost 2 1/2 weeks and I was really sick. It was a long drive to the hospital so we decided to have the kids stay with their grandparents during that time so my husband could work during the day and visit me in the evenings. At their ages then, it worked out well.

Once I got home from the hospital, my husband took a week off to care for me. The grandparents still helped out some with the kids, but after not seeing me for so long, the kids really wanted to be home with me; which again, worked out well.

If you haven't already talked to the kids teachers and the school principal about your situation, I'd suggest you have those conversations. The teachers and principal were some of the first people I told when I found out I had cancer. I wanted them aware of the situation so they could help my kids accordingly, be prepared for any changes in behavior (and let me know about it), utilize school counselors if necessary - all that stuff. The school teachers and principal have been a tremendous help in keeping my kids lives as normal as can be hoped for. Something to keep in mind as this school year ends, I always have a sit down with the school principal and discuss how important it is that my kids receive the appropriate teacher based on their personality's, learning style and my health situation. I always figure if my health starts to deteriorate, it's extra important that my kids have supportive teachers in their lives. We have a big school, so there are as many as 3-4 classes for each grade level.

I know it seems like forever to have to wait for the surgery and if you're like I was, I just wanted that monster OUT of my body NOW!!!! But it sounds like you have a good plan in place. Good luck and keep us posted as you feel up to it.

[KellyW]

thank you!

I have told my son's kindy teacher so she knows, as well as my younger ones' preschool teacher. I had originally planned to take the boys to CT to visit my parents over vacation so we are going to do that. I have my pre-op appointment on Wed and then I'll drive down there and my mom will drive back up with me on Saturday and then stay for a few weeks. The boys are excited to go visit them and it will be good for me to get out o fthe house for a bit.

I'm more at peace w/ waiting the extra week. Waiting 3 more weeks seemed emotionally impossible. The surgeon did call me to apologize for the miscommunication. My GI is awesome. I called her just to vent b/c she said, "call me anytime" and she has the best bedside manner I've ever encountered. She was frustrated for me b/c she jumped through hoops to get me in immediately- like when she called me, she had me in the next day for my tattooing and then the next day for my surgical consult, etc. she said she was going to call this surgeon on my behalf. She said, "this surgeon is very good at what she does, but is newer to this hospital and I want to gently whisper to her that rescheduling to a later date for a newly diagnosed cancer patient is very traumatic."

[Future_Med]

She said, "this surgeon is very good at what she does, but is newer to this hospital and I want to gently whisper to her that rescheduling to a later date for a newly diagnosed cancer patient is very traumatic."

I LOVE this! Clearly a great GI And absolutely true. Glad she understands how tough the waiting (and waiting longer even) is and is going to go to bat for you. When I first saw my surgeon the first week of December 2010, the first available surgery date my surgeon had was January 13th 2011. In his own words, that length of time waiting for surgery (over a month) wouldn't make any difference medically and had the added bonus of allowing me to spend the month visiting with family, and especially spending time with my dad who was flying out for a month... but he also said that if I was just going to worry and stress for the whole month, then he would get me in before Christmas. At the time I told him I'd be fine waiting as I had a great support system, but he told me if I changed my mind to just call his assistant in the morning... he clearly knew me better than I did, because after talking it over with my family that night I decided that I truly would just be stressing the whole time (I wanted the cancer out now!) and called his assistant. Well he wasn't kidding, he did get me in before Christmas... the morning of December 24th I was headed to the OR A lot of times when I tell people the date of the surgery, they make a sarcastic comment about what a lovely christmas present that must have been. The truth is that getting in for surgery 3 weeks early was truly the greatest gift I could have received. Like you, waiting those 3 extra weeks seemed emotionally impossible.

Glad you're getting in only a week behind the original schedule. Good plan going to visit family, I know the 2 weeks between when my dad came out and my surgery were made a lot more bearable (although still hard) by the fact that I spent a lot of time doing things with family. Hope everything goes smoothly for you from here on out

Aideen