rsb wrote:Let's get real here. Anyone frightened of a(possible) diagnosis is freaking out and needs medical advice. Why would anyone experiencing abnormal bodily functions ignore obvious (or not-so-obvious) warning signs? If something doesn't seem right with your body, have it checked out. Common sense should tell you that when you've live 20-60 years without ever bleeding out of your ass, there might be a problem if we have a stream coming out. Why do we need someone on a web-site to tell us to have it checked out?!! This is a SUPPORT forum, not a diagnostic one. My vote is to have a rote reply for all general inquiries: "Please seek medical advice", and do not personalize a reply until they have a specific post related to the forum.
CRguy wrote:I don't specifically recall the post threads you might refer to, but "stageism" is a non-issue....we have folks here who are not patients..i.e. NO stage ! and they are welcome as important members of this forum ... So are you.
The choice to post or not is yours alone. If some posts ( or PMs ) bug you then don't reply, or if they are truly offensive or threatening,report them to a moderator. Strongly opinionated posters do NOT determine the forum's policy. I think you will find that is well set out in Molly's "Welcome" Announcement . If you have been reading since Feb 2011, then you know there are lots of folks here with whom you will be able to have a discussion, and some you may not... just like other forums, and as I have found, just like real life.
This thread is about seeking unauthorized medical advice online. You sought medical advice and have since gotten a good diagnosis and are being followed up. I don't see anything wrong with that ????
The choice to post is yours alone. Hopefully you will decide to continue to contribute to the forum.
KimT wrote:I'm going to blow this wide open as I've gotten pms from people who agreed with me and were glad I said what I did. And for others who have posted in this thread. There IS a problem with stageism on this board. Just because you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
Gaelen wrote:KimT wrote:I'm going to blow this wide open as I've gotten pms from people who agreed with me and were glad I said what I did. And for others who have posted in this thread. There IS a problem with stageism on this board. Just because you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
Actually, I have to agree with KimT - her entire statement. "Stageism" has come up on and been an undercurrent on this board (and on some others) pretty much ever since I've been reading it since about 2006 or 2007. It ranges from as subtle as someone like Bradyr wanting to people to temper their replies based on the poster's stage to as overt as late stage patients openly admitting that they didn't understand or had a hard time with long-term early stage survivors continuing to bemoan that they'd had cancer decades after their treatment. And just like cancer - ignoring stageism or saying it doesn't exist because you haven't personally seen/read it doesn't make it go away.
This isn't the only forum where stageism happens. And frankly, sometimes it slips into a post without an actual intent.
I didn't go all the way back to February - but this thread from June of this year is a pretty good example of stageist conversations that we've had here from time to time - warning! don't read the thread if you're feeling fragile about being here with a stage 0-1 diagnosis! That doesn't mean the posters opinions aren't honest, but at some point in the thread I'm pretty sure a couple stage I and stage II posters noted how uncomfortable the "rant" was making them. And to their credit, some of the stage IV posters also noted that they weren't always proud of the their feelings when stageism crept in...but at least those posters had the stones to admit it happens, and try to figure out how to deal with it.
I do think stage-ism is a topic for a different thread, though - this one is having enough trouble figuring out how to effectively help and address people's questions without offering medical advice.
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