Best Friend Just Diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer.

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Donna
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Mar 10, 2006 2:44 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Best Friend Just Diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer.

Postby Donna » Fri Mar 10, 2006 3:19 pm

:( , Hello everyone,
I just got news two days ago that my best friend of 30 yrs was diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer. This is her second time around. Four years ago, at the age of 45, she had her original diagnose, she had surgery, chemo, and was cancer free until now. The cancer has spread to both her liver and lungs. I wanted to find out more about her type of cancer, and through my research, I came upon your wonderful web sight. I have been reading some of the entries and I found some very encouraging responses. Since I live in Minneapolis and she in Austin, Texas, I don't get to see her often. When I speak to her on the phone I feel as though I get tongue tied at what to talk about. Everything I say seems so trivial compared to what she is dealing with. She has assured me though that conversations that don't include cancer are much appreciated. She has an amazing outlook and spirit, and I cannot state enough how much respect and admiration I have for her right now. And I don't want to burden her too much with how this is affecting me. That is why I am grateful I discovered your web sight. I can provide her with as much support and encouragement as she will need, and she has an amazing circle of friends close to her in Austin that will assist her with this journey. I guess though for those of us who will be taking care of her we will also need a soft place to rest and talk about our feelings. So is it o.k. for me to do that here on this sight? I know that those of you that have survived stage IV colon cancer, and those of you who are currently fighting for your lives, and for those friends and family members of those cancer patients I have much to learn from. I humbly would appreciate any guidance and knowledge you have to share.
Thank you so much.
Donna.

Carol Connell
Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:17 am
Location: NH

Postby Carol Connell » Sat Mar 11, 2006 8:20 am

Hi Donna, yes you are welcome here. This site is for patients and
care givers. I too have stage IV with mets to the Liver and Lungs.
I have been on and off Chemo for almost 2 years now, I am 64.

Your friend is doing the same thing I did in the beginning, asking
everyone not to talk cancer. I soon reached a point where I needed to talk and cry. The main thing you can do is to let her know that you
are there and when she wants to talk or cry, just tell you. It might
be easier for you to write a letter and tell her how you feel and what her
friendship means to you. Visit this site everyday if you can to learn
what we do to help with side effects and what treatments we are on.
Tell your friend she is not alone and to stay pro-active in her care.


Carol

Holly
Posts: 537
Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2005 11:06 pm

Wow

Postby Holly » Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:00 am

Donna,

Welcome to the Colon Club. I hope that you find support and encouragement as I have over the past year!

Above all, I want you to remember that ALL things are possible! This coming from a stage IV survivor who was given little hope for survival. I am cancer free!

Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers!

Hugs!

Holly

Donna
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Mar 10, 2006 2:44 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Postby Donna » Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:06 am

Carol Connell wrote:Hi Donna, yes you are welcome here. This site is for patients and
care givers. I too have stage IV with mets to the Liver and Lungs.
I have been on and off Chemo for almost 2 years now, I am 64.

Your friend is doing the same thing I did in the beginning, asking
everyone not to talk cancer. I soon reached a point where I needed to talk and cry. The main thing you can do is to let her know that you
are there and when she wants to talk or cry, just tell you. It might
be easier for you to write a letter and tell her how you feel and what her
friendship means to you. Visit this site everyday if you can to learn
what we do to help with side effects and what treatments we are on.
Tell your friend she is not alone and to stay pro-active in her care.



Carol


Carol,
Thank you for your insight. I always knew I could be present for my friend and support and listen to her, but I am a bit surprised by my emotions. I guess one never knows how they'll feel or respond until an situation like this occurs. Sometimes I just want to scream to the heavens and ask "why". I am humbled by my friends strength and positive attitude as she faces this cancer for the second time. She really is my hero. I will be going to Austin the first week in April to be with her, she starts chemo on the 3rd. When she was originally diagnosed her treatment did not affect her dramatically, she did not get sick or loose her hair. I'm not quite sure what type of chemo she will receive this time around, but she said that she will loose her hair. What are some of the other side affects from chemo, physically or emotionally? I will be grateful for any information you or any other person that wishes to share their experience.
I have already learned a few things from reading the entries on this site; that one has to be aware of the various treatments available, be pro-active about their treatment, deal with the side affects and emotions that surface, and try to have some semblance of a life. It must be overwhelming Carol, I cannot imagine.
Again, thank you for your wisdom.
God Bless.
Donna.

Dana

Some give up

Postby Dana » Fri Mar 17, 2006 5:20 pm

:) Hello,
my mother was diagnosed in october and passed away in february. Unfortunately it was too late as her colon cancer stage IV was in her liver and lungs and a small cell in her brain too. We live in Italy (my mum was Irish) and did everything we could possibly do. She had a surgery and all her colon was removed. She started chemo: Xeloda (preparing for Oxaliplatin) but it didn't reach the liver, the chemo just went through her body. We never told her she had little time to live, and always tried to give her hope. She lived extra months as the first diagnosos only gave her 3 months.
Unfortunately it was her liver that was covered over 90% by the tumor.
Had she been diagnosed earlier....
Never neglect your symptoms, she had all. Most of all she had high sugar levels in her blood and low iron (her doctor put her on a diet for diabetes so she lost a lot of weight and was already weak when daignosed with cancer).
Be strong and positive as this helps to give strenghth and hope to your dear ones and what they need is to be surrounded by love.
This was the only good advice given to us by doctors: a positive attitude can make miracles. We had ours: an extra two months with her.
My love goes out to you all still fighting.
Dana

Tallgirl_5_11
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Mar 20, 2006 9:40 am
Location: Howell, Michigan

Postby Tallgirl_5_11 » Mon Mar 20, 2006 10:48 am

Hi Donna,
I am new to this website and I think it is wonderful. I am a 37 year old mother of 2 with stage IV colon cancer. I went through 1 round of chemo and surgery last year. I was off chemo for about 5 months and it started to grow again in my liver and I am on chemo again as of February. My friends and family have been such good support for me to make my life feel normal again. I get so many phone calls from friends asking me how i am feeling. My goal one day is for a friend to call me up and we don't even talk about cancer. Trying to get back to "normal" is now my goal. I am not letting cancer take over my life. I enjoy life too much and have too much to do to let cancer take over. I am glad you are there for your friend and she needs you to make her laugh and feel "normal" again.
Lynn


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