The Colon Club

Bumping up

My question to radnyc from June 14 is still unanswered...

Sun June 16, 2019
radnyc wrote:
Bumping up

Fri Jun 14, 2019
LPL wrote:
radnyc, do you want caregivers and loved ones to post in this thread and not participate elsewhere in ColonClub?

Fri Jun 14, 2019
radnyc wrote:
Bumping up

Thu Jun 13, 2019
Colon Club Moderators Committee wrote:
.. This post will serve to bump this to the first page.

Ok Radnyc, I think we got it . Maybe the forum should state it’s a patient only forum .
Stu

ccmc wrote:To move a topic back onto the first page all you need to do is make a post into that topic, otherwise known as "bumping" a topic.

This post will serve to bump this to the first page. If members wish to keep it active, just keep posting into it.
It was not lost or locked, it was just inactive.

I think it also deserves to be noted that just saying "bumping up" in the text is not what was intended from the ccmc
ADDING relevant content, in context, IS how topics should be bumped if they are inactive, like this one was.
From my own experience here ( since 2008 ) "empty" bumps tend to get deleted, which just drops the topic back to it's last posting date.
IF someone wants to "bump" a topic, then please contribute to it meaningfully.

This forum is open for registered members to post into any open topic.
No individual member decides which topic is appropriate for another member.

THIS topic was started by a wife of a Stage IV husband.
Over the years MANY members from many different situations have contributed and that is the way it should stay.

CRguy

Don't want to put words into Radnyc's mouth, butt maybe he meant that sometimes caretakers need additional encouragement and it may be found from folks in a similar situation, I would bee very surprised if he wanted to discourage caretakers from the forum as a whole. It's a pretty small group here and almost everyone has something valuable to contribute

stu wrote:Ok Radnyc, I think we got it . Maybe the forum should state it’s a patient only forum .
Stu

Yes Stu, that is also how I interpret this.
Sadly..

"Fri Jun 14, 2019
LPL wrote:
radnyc, do you want caregivers and loved ones to post in this thread and not participate elsewhere in ColonClub?"

I have never insinuated that caregivers not post on this thread or anywhere else on the forum. My interest in bringing back to the top the Wives thread which apparently had fallen into the abyss, was to make sure that new posters know that there's such a place for them to reach out to people with similar concerns. Same goes for the Prayers thread.

Post on!

Peace.

Al

radnyc wrote:"Fri Jun 14, 2019
LPL wrote:
radnyc, do you want caregivers and loved ones to post in this thread and not participate elsewhere in ColonClub?"

I have never insinuated that caregivers not post on this thread or anywhere else on the forum. My interest in bringing back to the top the Wives thread which apparently had fallen into the abyss, was to make sure that new posters know that there's such a place for them to reach out to people with similar concerns. Same goes for the Prayers thread.

Post on!

Peace.

Al

Well,
It sounds as I must have misunderstood everything - your words/actions (but I was obviously not the only one.)

What made me think that you in fact had some motive was that sadly I still remember your words (that you deleted) in your thread ‘Never mind’
viewtopic.php?f=1&t=61982&start=15#p489508

Thank you for replying.

BUMP

I'm bumping this thread up in case there are any new caregivers here who might be interested.

This thread was started over 10 years ago and has had over 3,500 replies. For the past few years, however, the thread had been dormant.

Perhaps some members here would find this thread of interest since it has covered quite a wide range of issues that caregivers of all types have encountered over the years. It could serve as a sort of meeting place and support group for members who have concerns about the caregiving role.

Here is the first post on this thread in 2011:

https://coloncancersupport.colonclub.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=18704&p=141728#p141728

I would be interested. I am new here. My husband was diagnosed in Sep 2018 (stage 4, liver mets); in the last year, spots on the lungs. He’s been actively on treatment and his cancer is not under control. I refresh my clinical trials search each day, praying for a miracle. I came to this site in searching for some hope as I head into this new year. I have found it difficult to talk to people in person about my husbands situation because I end up crying. So just joined 2 message boards in the last 24 hours. It’s been both encouraging and depressing but I need a place. I’d love to connect with any fellow caregiver or person who can relate. I’m a mom to 3 school aged children and work full time. I’ve noticed over the last 4 years my friendships have become more distant due to combo my withdrawal and likely my friends feeling cautious to ask. It’s been very lonely as my husband has also become more withdrawn because he hasn’t been able to leave the house too much. The kids school and activities keep us busy and active but feel like I’m wearing a masked grin all day.

Hi Suelee,

I am also a wife. My husband was diagnosed 10/27/22. So I am fairly new to all of this. I do understand the feeling of isolation. People reached out when they first heard, but after that it just feels like they don’t want you to even mention it. I just feel like everyone gets uncomfortable. If you ever need to talk let me know.

nmorgen wrote:Hi Suelee,

I am also a wife. My husband was diagnosed 10/27/22. So I am fairly new to all of this. I do understand the feeling of isolation. People reached out when they first heard, but after that it just feels like they don’t want you to even mention it. I just feel like everyone gets uncomfortable. If you ever need to talk let me know.

Hi nmorgen,
Happy New Year and thank you so much for your note. I was at a pretty low point last week. But I have found it very comforting these last couple days reading the messages of so many strong people, those recently starting the fight and others who have been doing this for quite some time. I know this is less than an ideal way to meet others but I hope we can be a support system. The isolation from friends, family, etc. I know can vary with each family but this has been one of my biggest challenges lately. I read that your husband has recently started his treatment so I will be thinking positive thoughts for him and you this next week. My husband's last scans from 2 weeks ago show progression in his liver, lungs and continued thickening of the rectal lining. He'll be starting up on a line of chemo that he's had before where the cancer was mildly progressing compared to the last line.

I would love to connect with you and will send you a private message.

Sue

My DH was diagnosed in 2015. His last scan was in 2017. He was supposed to follow up with colonoscopy in the fall and never did. I saw blood on his shorts the weekend after Thanksgiving. He just needs to make the call, but he won't. He is very stubborn obviously. My nagging does no good at all. It took 4 months for him to agree to go last time.

What I'm struggling with is speculation. He has some days when he seems symptomatic, trips to the toilet, etc. He appears to me to have lost about 10 pounds or so (very overweight to begin with). Other days I think I'm going crazy. Honestly, I don't want to know if it's back either. I find myself making "plans" just in case.

Thanks for being there.

Wow pantufla, it really does seem like your husband is putting his head in the sand. I really hope he sees reason and goes and gets checked out. I can understand not wanting to go through the cancer stuff again, but ignoring it is not the solution.

Pantufla,
I hope that you were able to convince your DH to get for a an appointment. I know how terrifying the thought of even starting this all over again. And hopefully something is just irritated down there and not something off too concern. The weight loss is concerning though but not sure how long that’s been tracking.

I know what it’s like to have a stubborn husband. That same stubbornness though will also kick in when a fight is needed though too!!