Postby karin » Mon Oct 26, 2009 11:22 pm
My best friend, who is about 1 1/2 weeks post-op from cytoreductive surgery w/HIPEC, hates it when every person she comes into contact with says "how are you feeling?', so now she just says "like sh*t!!"....sounds crass, yes, but at this point.....well, be careful what you ask.....right? When people ask me how she is doing, I respond "Chemo is difficult, and/or surgery was painful, and/or being in the hospital means she is seriously ill and means being away from family, friends and work, so it is life-altering, even for short periods of time". It may sound harsh, but it is the truth.
I really agree with answering honestly when someone asks if there is anything you need or they can do: "yes, send money!!!!"..... It doesn't hurt to educate, about what CRC does to the person financially, I mean, set up an account for donations and carry around little notes with the bank name and account # and ask them to make a deposit, put the info on your facebook or myspace page, and send out a mass email....she had an account set up for her by her friends and so far it is working well....I mean, at first, friends just showed up with expensive gifts, or, services that would require a routine investment of money and/or time, etc., really nice all in all but, finally, we just asked for donations....a month of housecleaning services, for instance, or a pizza delivered once a week, would better serve her as a cash donation to pay toward her rent or to buy groceries!!! This is very important for some, in her case, she has been blessed that her employer has "carried" her, literally, kept her on the payroll (as a very part-time employee), so that she could maintain her health insurance, and her son's pre-K private school is being donated....but, she still has to keep a roof over their heads and buy food, and, until she gets much stronger physically she needs help.....and, as the saying goes "that's what friends are for" !!
Karin
BFF dx'd June09 w CRC & peritoneal mucinous carcinomatosis @ age 40
She beat cancer for 20 months!